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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-25-2005
New here
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Mon, 01-22-2007 - 4:41pm
Hi all. I'm new here. My mom passed away on Dec. 24 from lung cancer. She fought for 3 years. It was terrible watching her go through chemo and radiation. She was so miserable that I am glad she is no longer suffering. But I still miss her. It's been a tough few weeks. I am almost 28 and the oldest of three children, so that means I'm the one everyone comes to for strength and support. I have two boys, 2 1/2 and 6 months. I'm now on Zoloft for depression. Luckily I was able to get help before mom actually passed, so the medication has definitely helped. However, today I feel like I'm losing it again. I'm not in the best of moods and am really irritable. I was sitting here thinking about why I'm feeling like this when it hit me that Wednesday will be one month since mom's death. Maybe that is why I feel like I'm slipping back into my pre-Zoloft ways. I guess I'm still having a hard time dealing with this. I thought I was doing better. Today is my dad's birthday. Yesterday I had everyone over for his birthday. Next Monday is my birthday. I'm sure the family will be over again. It's so hard when we all get together and mom is not here. Maybe that is also what has me down today. I know people say things will get easier, but is that really true? I just don't know what to do when I have these bad days. I feel like I have no control over my emotions at this point. I try to put on a brave face for everyone else, but it's hard when I'm by myself. I guess these milestones are tough to get through. How have you all dealt with your grief? How did you get past the one month anniversary?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-25-2005
In reply to: flowers_mom_1
Mon, 01-29-2007 - 6:03pm
I'm sorry for your loss. It is so much harder than I expected to lose a mother. I thought I was prepared because she fought the cancer for 3 years, but I guess you can never really be prepared for such a significant loss. The people on this board are wonderful. Feel free to post anytime about anything.

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