new and really need someone to talk to

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-31-2006
new and really need someone to talk to
16
Fri, 02-09-2007 - 6:42pm

HI everyone,
I don't think I've ever posted on this board but I really need to talk to someone who might understand what I'm going through right now.

Here's my story;
One week ago yesterday I learned that I was having my 4th miscarriage.
I am totally shocked and confused and quite honestly don't know how I should feel.
Now I am a seemingly perfectly healthy 26 year old and all of the preliminary tests are showing nothing wrong so these m/c's are unexplainable.

The thing that is frustrating is that everyone in my life keeps telling me "well so-and-so had (insert number here) miscarriages before they had a baby and you will be fine. ARGH!!!

Someone please tell me that I'm not losing my mind and that somehow I'll get throught this, because right now it's not looking so good.
Thanks for letting me vent

Pages

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-03-2007
Fri, 02-09-2007 - 8:27pm

I'm so sorry for what you are going through and I only hope that it helps you to know that there so many here who truly care about what you are feeling.I wish that there easy answers for what you are going through, but there aren't.

One thing I have learned though is research, ask questions, understand as much as possible and realize that you are not to blame. I have really been struggling with blaming myself, but everyone tells me that is typical. I lost my son Henry this past Dec. 15th at 5 months, and I can tell you that the miscarriage and stillbirth boards are wonderful, even if all you do is read the posts.

As far as the future and what it holds, I won't be one of those "it's all for the best" or "what's meant to be will be", but I do have a friend that lost three babies, had her neautiful son, lost two more and then had a gorgeous little girl. Just have faith in yourself


Theresa
mom to Jessica 8-14-1990,
Ryan 8-29-1991
and our angel Henry born still 12-15-2006




Edited 2/12/2007 11:50 am ET by mom_to_henry

[img

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-31-2006
Fri, 02-09-2007 - 8:53pm

TY for your reply and I am so sorry for your loss, I know from experience that nothing can numb the pain but as bad as it sounds it's nice to have someone to talk to who knows how it feels and understands your pain.

I've been trying really hard not to blame myself but after the 4th time it's not easy to NOT wonder what did I do wrong?
I think I might stick around here for a little while

again,TY




Edited 2/10/2007 1:31 pm ET by soon2bmrsh
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-09-2007
Fri, 02-09-2007 - 11:35pm
You're not crazy. It's not a matter of having one someday it's a matter of not having this one now. People who haven't been there don't know anythimg about it. They mean well but they should just stick with saying they're sorry.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Sat, 02-10-2007 - 4:23pm

I'm so very sorry to hear

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-26-2004
Sun, 02-11-2007 - 1:27pm

I want to extend to you a belated welcome to our board, (((((Soon2bmrsh))))).

AcornLeaves
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2003
Sun, 02-11-2007 - 9:43pm

Oh, I am so sorry for you. My eldest daughter had

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-26-2004
Mon, 02-12-2007 - 3:36pm
Welcome, (((((Marilyniv))))).
AcornLeaves
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-31-2006
Mon, 02-12-2007 - 6:17pm
TY all for taking the time to respond.
I'm in this mood today of why did this happen to me? Everyone around me is having a baby and I'm stuck here wondering why I'm defective.
I did some nosing around and found out that my maternal grandmother who had 4 children also had 5 miscarriages in the process, everyone else in my family has had no problem having children so that's the only genetic link I can find.
I think I mentioned that we are starting treatment with a specialist in May.
I am praying that we will find out what is causing this to happen to me and hopefully the problem is reversible and we can finally have the baby we so badly want.
again thank you all for taking the time to respond
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-11-2004
Tue, 02-13-2007 - 3:09pm
Welcome. I can't add more than what the others did, but I wanted you to know you are so very welcome here.



Beth
Proud to be co-cl for


Avatar for klmuc
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-30-2003
Tue, 02-13-2007 - 4:33pm

To want a child so much & to have gone through so many losses is just heartbreaking. I am so sorry. I am glad you are here.

Karen

Pages