Thinking of Mom...
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| Fri, 07-13-2007 - 1:53pm |
Haven't posted here in awhile but I check the posts from time to time...
For those of you who don't remember me, I lost my mother last November - I actually took care of her for years before. She was on a ventilator and couldn't really walk much so we would have a nurse during the day and I would care for her at night and weekends. I adored taking care of her and she always felt guilty so i would try and ease the guilt by saying how she took care of me when i was little and that i was just returning the favor...
Anyway, she ended up going into cardiac arrest at home and was revived and rushed to the hospital where she lay for days completely out of it until we just started stopping her meds, then fluids and finally her vent. Ironically she was breathing on her own for almost half an hour before she finally passed...
Anyway - today for some reason I have her on my mind...I have her picture at my desk at work that i glance at but today is different. It's like no matter what is going on at work (someone telling me a story, joke, etc) i am reminded of her. It's not her birthday or any special "date" just any other day.....I just miss her so much.
I didn't really date much while I cared for her which was fine, but I have been seeing this wonderful guy who treats me like a queen. He is always there for me and goes above and beyond boyfriend duties.... The other day was our 5 month anniversary and it just got me thinking how I would have loved for him and my mom to meet...she would have loved him too! She would always say I need to go out more, meet someone, but at that point in my life, she was my focus and I was satisfied with that.
Anyway, just wanted to share that...does anyone else have days like this?? It's not like I don't think about her everyday, it's just today it seems like EVERYTHING leads right back to her somehow....
Vicki
CL-Crohn's Disease and Colitis


(((((Vicki)))))
I am sorry for your loss. I lost my mom Dec of 2004, and yes, I know exactly how you feel. Even now there are times when it just hits me and I wish this and I wish that. Its ok to feel this way. It sounds like your boyfriend is just what you need sweetie. Go with the flow sweetheart. Your mom knows and you know she would want you to be happy. She is always with you and I am sure as you said she has already fallen in love with your boyfriend.
I am glad you wrote to let us know how your doing. Just remember your ok and your feelings are ok. Please post again to let us know how your doing, we all care.
Love ya
Gail
xoxoxoxoxo
Hi Vicki
I know what you mean. There are days that I would just love to call Mama. When the Magpie does something outrageous, I would love to hear Mama laugh. Just think of these days, like I do, these are the days I can feel Mama's love the best.
So...you are dating, huh? That is great! How pleased your Mom must be that her princess has found a prince!
Thanks for much for the wonderful replies!!
(((((Vicki))))), thanks for updating us.