Painful sex for years

Avatar for missourigrl
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Painful sex for years
2
Mon, 08-11-2008 - 10:16am
 

Hello!  I'm 28 and have been having painful sex for years (5 or 6).  It's a burning and sharp pain and penetration is very difficult even though we use lubrication.   I've been with the same man but as you can imagine it has put a huge strain on our relationship.  I should mention that I have been with one other person before my current boyfriend and sex was not painful then and it was not painful with my current boyfriend for the first couple of years.


One doctor I went to said I have vestibulitis.  She confirmed this by touching the area just inside my vaginal opening on the left (which is where the pain is) with the fluffy end of a q-tip and it hurt.


I've been to several different doctors (gynos) and have tried everything they've suggested from using olive oil on the affected area, to removing all perfumes and dyes (soaps, laundry detergents etc) from my life, to using lidocaine on the area.  I've done much more than that but those are just some examples.  Nothing has worked and we are both fed up.  I have no interest in sex and he does of course.  It's awful when I have to lay there in pain while he has an orgasm.


I've been on the pill since I was 19 and even my yearly gyno exam is painful.  My boyfriend searched online and said maybe I should try a dermatologist instead of another gynecologist.  Has anyone had this problem?  Has anything worked for you?  Do you think I should see a dermatologist?  I don't know what to do anymore, I feel like I'm dumed to have painful sex for the rest of my life.  Any thoughts and suggestions are greatly appreciated!!!  Thank you for listening.

 

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-23-2004
Thu, 08-14-2008 - 11:57am

Welcome missourigrl.


I'm sorry to hear you are suffering from painful intercourse.


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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-26-2006
Thu, 08-14-2008 - 6:51pm

Hi there,

Have you tried going off the pill to see if that helps? It could be causing vaginal dryness, which will make sex and gyn exams very painful. You could try doing that, and taking Vitamin E capsules to help rejuvenate the vaginal tissue. Aloe vera gel may help as well, or an intimate lubricant that is designed for every day use, rather than just sex. I found a product called Sylk quite good, because it is a natural product, so without added chemicals, it didn't upset already irritated vaginal tissue.

Also, because the pain has been ongoing for so long now, there is likely to be a psychological aspect to it too. You will be expecting it to hurt, so it will hurt, and probably hurt more than it otherwise would. Your vaginal muscles can clench up against penetration, and with the lack of lubrication in the vaginal tissues, it will cause a lot of pain.

Ideally, you need to find a gynecologist or specialist that specialises in vulva issues. Unfortunately, they are quite hard to find, and may not be covered by insurance.