I am depressed today....
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I am depressed today....
| Mon, 10-06-2003 - 3:15pm |
I didnt work yesterday (so i have had a week off!!) We hada cook-out at my sisters in Clearwater because my Mom is MOVING to Indiana this Friday.I know its a good thing for her--my poor sister has been so overwhelmed w/ doing so much for her here..i have a younger sis in INDY & there is an assisted living there that she is going to try-out.If she likes it she is staying!!!I feel so guilty..I wish that I could AFFORD to quit my job,buy a bigger home and be there totally for my mom..but it is not going to work.I have kids that still need me,and Mom can be a full-time job sometimes.But I still feel like I am failing her..but I cant fail my family..I dont know who should come first.I am really depressed today,We did have nice day yesterday..and I am going to drive to Clearwater on Thursday to take her to lunch b-4 she moves on Friday.Mom really wants to leave florida--she HATES the heat..the only reason she moved here in the first place is because of the grand-kids living here--but now the kids are getting older..and so is she.So Here I sit feeling sad and GUILTY for something that is out of my control.I just wish things were different.... Mel


**Hey Bud, This Aussie knows exactly how you feel when it comes to parents :). You should be feeling sad, it is a sad situation. It IS really hard sometimes watching parents grow older and you are right there is nothing you can do about it. Also remember that they have had their time and unless they have to should never expect to move in with their children. No matter how much you love your Mum, your husband and sons come first. Just imagine if she did live with you!!! I seem to remember her visiting for just a few days a while ago!
Just hang on to the fact that your Mum is doing what she wants to do and be proud of her for making the decision to move into assisted living and where the climate suits her better. I don't know the geography but hopefully you will be able to see her regularly. I am heading rapidly there with my parents although they are still in pretty good shape considering. Hilary
Aw Mel - - You KNOW you've done the best and all you can.
{{Mel}}
Aww hon, it's aways so hard when our parents keep aging to the point of needing help and we feel helpless.
Don't feel guilty hon, your mom wouldn't want that...she's going to a climate and place she really wants.
Don't feel guilty hon .. YOu have done what you could when you could.
You do have your own life with your children now.
Your Mom understands.
"Mel on Wheels"
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"Mel on Wheels"
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put her 2 cents in also.
Your Mom is doing EXACTLY what she wants to do. At least she is going to be near
Nancy & Andy & their daughter, rather than in Mississipppi, as was a possible plan.
Be thankful she still has the mental capacity to make her own decisions....at 75,
that is wonderful.
Through tons and tons of em's & im's w/your *real* big sis, where she cried and sighed
and vented to me about the trials & tribulations w/your Mom, Tina, I ABSOLUTELY believe SHE needs this break. She has a daughter who NEEDS HER this final year of high school.
And you need a break from the guilt of not making that drive to Clearwater more often.
So..........BE HAPPY, not depressed & guilty. You HAVE given your mother so much joy
over the years as she watched Andrew & Logan grow from babies to young boys.
Let's just keep our fingers crossed she can find some bridge partners she likes ,
food she likes , and good medical attention at this assisted-living facility.
Always know you have been a GOOD daughter....well, once you got out of that bratty,
sassy, rebellious stage...ha ha!
xoxo stel
* Stel *
"Mel on Wheels"
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