How many of you . . .

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-01-2004
How many of you . . .
21
Fri, 09-10-2004 - 2:51pm
When I fell in love with gf and decided that I'm a lesbian, I thought that I was the only straight woman in the world who fell in love with a woman and out of love with all men practically overnight. Obviously I am wrong about this, because I have found all of you . . .

Since I'm new here and don't know all of your stories, I was just curious how many of you were in heterosexual relationships when you discovered you wanted to be with women? Many of you have advised me about dh and my upcoming divorce so I am assuming that it's quite a few of you. I am just curious as to how widespread this (wonderful,) epidemic is?

Scarlet :)

Scarlett
my blog

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Avatar for tookie12
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Fri, 09-10-2004 - 3:00pm
*raises her hand and waves it wildly*

Me Me Me Me

took me 20 years of marriage to finally smarten up....not the brightest bulb in the tulip patch am I.....

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

my blog....where i scoop the poop

htt

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-15-2004
Fri, 09-10-2004 - 3:07pm
Well, I am 35, and divorcing my second husband. Throughout my life I have always been attracted to butch women, but I never said a word. I also had frequent dreams of making love to women, I ignored them. I think part of me was in denial about my sexuality because my sister is gay, I didn't think there could be two in one family. How's that for a stupid reason? Anyway, now that I finally found the courage to kiss a girl, as well as all the other things we do, I can't imagine why I would ever want a man in my life again. I absolutely LOVE living with Jen. We have problems, but they are outside issues, Jen and I love eachother. Well, I am getting off the subject.....put me on the list as a "heterosexual" woman that discovered she wanted to be with women pretty late in life. Sandra

Afterthought: Sometimes I am jealous of Jen because she is really different than me. She always knew she was a lesbian, she doesn't wear makeup or dresses, she is good- no awesome- at sports,her gestures are masculine but her body is oh so feminine. She is THE perfect woman for me. She knows exactly who she is and has few sexual regrets. You probably don't know this but my girlfriend is only 18 years old, I really hate telling that but I have a point: some women always knew, and the world can tell who they are just by looking at them. I feel like I have lived a lie so long, and look too femme for anyone to take me seriously as a lesbian, like I am not a "real" lesbian. If I would have only done things differently....I would feel like I am something, not a big question mark.

Sandr

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-16-2003
Fri, 09-10-2004 - 3:13pm

>>look too femme for anyone to take me seriously as a lesbian, like I am not a "real" lesbian<<


I've often thought that about myself. In a way I want people to think "lesbian" when they see me. But, I also know that I am most comfortable and happy being me (the femme), and all that matters is that I have someone who knows exactly who I am inside and out and loves me for that.


Ting 

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-15-2004
Fri, 09-10-2004 - 4:19pm
It's pretty hard to be taken seriously when you have looked and acted one way your whole life, and then everything changes. I guess all that matters is that Jen knows, but it makes "coming out" even harder when the response you get from family and friends is "whatever". It's not like I should have to go around defending my "lesbianism" anyway. (is that even a word?) My own daughter doesn't even believe me! Sandra

Sandr

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-16-2003
Fri, 09-10-2004 - 4:35pm

In my case

Kim
Check out my

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-01-2004
Fri, 09-10-2004 - 6:00pm
I had dreams about making love to women too. I thought every straight woman did this, am I wrong?

Also, I really wanted to sleep with Angelina Jolie and Gwen Stefani, but also thought that everyone wanted to sleep with them, male or female.

Was I ignoring the markers in the road?

???Scarlet

Scarlett
my blog

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-01-2004
Fri, 09-10-2004 - 6:02pm
Sandra,

How old is your daughter? Do you have other children?

Scarlet

Scarlett
my blog

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-15-2004
Fri, 09-10-2004 - 7:39pm
I have only one child, she is 15 years old. I had her when I was only 19, we kinda grew up together and are very close. I have parenting issues because of this. She accepts me for who I am, although she finds it hard to believe because my sister, who is her aunt and Godmother, is gay and we aren't alike at all. I try to tell her that everyone who is gay is not butch, but since she saw me act straight all of her life, she thinks this is a phase for me.

How old are your girls again?

Sandra

Sandr

Avatar for themadhugger
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-21-2003
Fri, 09-10-2004 - 7:49pm

And I love every part of the femme that you are Baby!

*hugs ~ Caly

Avatar for themadhugger
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-21-2003
Fri, 09-10-2004 - 8:11pm

Hi hun,


To fill you in on my story, I was in a Heterosexual relationship for 14 years but I was Never heterosexual. I have known deep down since High school that I was a Lesbian, but I chose to marry Jeff at the time because it was the "normal" thing to do for one, and I wanted children and most of all I thought it best to please my mother.

*hugs ~ Caly

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