My father is driving me crazy!

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-15-2004
My father is driving me crazy!
15
Thu, 09-30-2004 - 9:10am
Hi everyone, I didn't post much yesterday because I had a bad day. My sister offered to find me a place to live in PA since I didn't want to fly up there to look for something. We talked about what I needed and wanted, things like the school district I wanted to live in and stuff like that. She spent all her free time, which she doesn't have much, looking, taking digital pics and sending them to me, and calling me. We finally found a nice townhouse and filled out the application, I was very relieved (please pray I get it!). Then my retired father who is bored out of his skull finds out and decides to "help" by asking his slumlord friends if they have any places available, gee thanks Dad. What luck, his friend has a small apartment that is a couple hundred dollars cheaper than what we found. It's in the wrong school district, he said we could lie and use someone else's address to get her in the school we wanted - I don't want to do that and its too small to fit all of our things, which he wants us to store in his garage. He is also looking for a job for me. I talk to my Dad very little, although I email my mom everyday she doesn't share our conversations with him and he honestly doesn't know me very well. I haven't lived near him in 8 years so he doesn't know what I do, or what my qualifications are. He is trying to pick my new life and he thinks its helping. When my sister told him we already found a place and that I need to find a job myself he said "you kids think you have all the answers" and he is mad. First of all we aren't kids, we are 31 and 35 yr. old parents. Second, we are the only 2 of his 5 kids that have a college education. We are his youngest so I guess we are always going to be the babies. Then he took the opportunity to remind us that if we are so smart then why are we both divorced? He has alot of nerve saying that since my parents have been married for 49 years but he has had the same mistress for 49 years. The stupid woman never married or had kids, she waited her whole life for my dad to leave my mom, which he still hasn't done. He should not give me relationship advice. If I say anyhting to him he "disowns" me, temporarily. Oh I forgot another thing, he was quizzing my sister about my divorce settlement, and she lied and said she didn't know. What do I do when he asks me? I don't think how much money I have is his or anyone elses business but lets just say I didn't get a lawyer(I have no debt) and I don't have to worry about getting a job immediately. I know he is trying to help, but I didn't ask for anything, his opinion included! I take that back, he is keeping my little dog for me until I can buy a home or find a place that allows pets. I couldn't bear to leave her behind. So, if I make him mad my precious angel will be homeless. I LOVE this dog and if she stays with my parents I can at least visit her and pick her up for visits at my house. What do I say to my father? He is being such a pain and has always been a know it all control freak. Wait until he tries to get me to go out with his friends sons and I tell him I am a lesbian - that will be awful. He disowned my older sister for 7 long years when she came out to him. He doesn't have 7 years to live I'm sure, I wasn't going to tell him at all. Help! Sandra

Sandr

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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-15-2004
Thu, 09-30-2004 - 12:39pm
Pam, Let's hope so, my Dad is a tough old German. Sometimes its hard to accept that his blood is running through my veins. I am having a better day, I got the house in PA that I wanted, maybe that will shut him up. My sister already gave the deposit, haha Dad. LOL Parents, can't live with them (no matter what age we are),can't shoot 'em! He, He, Sandra

Sandr

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-15-2004
Thu, 09-30-2004 - 12:45pm
Not soon enough, Oct. 12-13th. I am packing already - things I don't really use. My house is trashed. It takes alot to sort through 12 years of shared belongings, I am glad I started early. Also, my ex and I owned a business together so I am setting up new computers and teaching someone else my job, what a pain! I can't wait to get out of here and lead a simple life......have a great day! Sandra

Sandr

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Fri, 10-01-2004 - 1:19am

Congratulations Sandra!


iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Fri, 10-01-2004 - 1:21am

>Parents, can't live with them (no matter what age we are),can't shoot 'em!


LOL Sandra!

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-15-2004
Fri, 10-01-2004 - 9:12am
Thank you!I'm so excited...it's going to be quite an adjustment but I can't wait! Sandra

Sandr

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