My heart is broken, literally...

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-24-2003
My heart is broken, literally...
35
Fri, 10-08-2004 - 10:53pm
This must not be my year. I have not been feeling very good. I have been diagnosed with diabetes and needing surgery and a knee replacement.

This week I found out that I am in congestive heart failure. I have been at the V.A. Hospital and am now waiting to see if there is any other damage to my heart and what will happen when the echo pics of my heart come back.

They asked if I ever had a heart attack before. I said there were a couple of times when I said I thought I was having one but figured it was something/anything else but that because I am to young. They say it is possible to have had a heart attack in my passed.

I am only 44 years old and thinking what the heck???

Diabetes and heart problems are a problem on my mom's side of the family, but I am the only one in my immediate family with these problems. I thought I would be spared these health problems at least until I was way older.

I have to continue on water pills, execise, strict diet and wearing those lovely white hose up to my knees when just sitting around. (I'll bet victoria secret does not make any of those.) lol

I have to quit smoking and let me tell you this has been the toughest thing of all.

They said at least cut back to half for now while losing weight. So I am really trying hard.

I have been afraid to just sit around but to tired not too.

I feel like a ticking time bomb and lastnight I just finally broke down and cried.

G/f was strong for me and got me to stop and calm down.

I keep feeling like eventually she will leave me for a healthier more active person like I used to be.

She swears not.

I have been able to talk to some people living with "CHF" that is the lingo for congestive heart failure. SO in a way I feel like I have a chance to get my self together for some good quality years ahead.

I do not know what they will do about my surgeries now though.

Wow! I hope there will be no more bad health news for me. I am hoping to work through this and turn in to a more physically fit person so that I can live at least a while longer the 5-10 years. Alot of people with "CHF" do. I have heard.

G/F has been off work to be with me. She has to go back tomorrow then off on Sunday.

I am pretty scared right now. I feel like I am in some big trouble health wise.

Well that is the low down on me for now. I need to catch up with the board.

Hugs,

Laurie
Laurie

My web pages
http://homepage.mac.com/lauriedav/PhotoAlbum1.html http://hometown.aol.com/didoangst/myhomepage/photo.html

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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-15-2004
Fri, 10-08-2004 - 11:03pm


{{{{{{{{{{Laurie}}}}}}}}}}.

Awwww, Laurie, I'm sorry. I'm glad you're g/f is there to support you when you need someone to be there, but remember we're here for you too.

Gentle hugs.

 


Hugs,


Sebastian


 


http://www.facebook.com/sebastianbruce

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-25-2004
Fri, 10-08-2004 - 11:34pm
I'm very sorry Laurie. I was actually thinking about you tonight wondering where you had been. I'll keep you in my prayers. I'm so sorry!

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Laurie}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

Your partner loves you.

Big hugs,

rj

rj

Franco Harris of the Pittsburgh Steelers in 197

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-24-2003
Fri, 10-08-2004 - 11:41pm
{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Laurie}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

Not much I can say that will ease the fear, I remember dealing with such fear 18 years ago... Pam knows the med stuff, and I'm an amateur... we'll leave that part to her. Just know you have cyber shoulders here to lean on, and we will gladly listen and chat as you wish.

Sending ya good thoughts, positive thoughts and that big hug.

nelle

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-29-2003
Sat, 10-09-2004 - 12:29am
Ohhhhhhhhhh (((((((((((Laurie Hon))))))))))))) So very sorry you are going through all this.. I am so glad you have your sweetheart with you and there for strength..
Do believe her when she says she would not leave.. She sounds like ~S~ and thats a

 C  >^. A .

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Sat, 10-09-2004 - 12:36am

((((((((((Laurie))))))))))


Sweetie.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Sat, 10-09-2004 - 12:49am
{{{{{Laurie}}}}} listen hun, I am echoing all of the responses thus far. I will keep you in my prayers and send out all of the healing vibes I can muster for you. But I needed to bring up one thing in your post...>>>G/f was strong for me and got me to stop and calm down. I keep feeling like eventually she will leave me for a healthier more active person like I used to be. She swears not.<<< Laurie hun, please give her more credit than that. She loves you. Gawds if my partner were going through anything like this...nothing on this earth would change the way I feel about her, let alone take me away from her. And I honestly believe that's how she feels. Okay, I've said my peace on that subject, so now I'll step down and give you my warmest xxxxx's and ooooo's. ~~sadie

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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-24-2003
Sat, 10-09-2004 - 2:53am
Thank you gigi! It really helps to be able to come here and type things out. things that are on my mind, especially at night when there is no one to talk with. I keep thinking and I cannot sleep. It is good to write here and get things off my mind before bed.

Hugs,

Laurie
Laurie

My web pages
http://homepage.mac.com/lauriedav/PhotoAlbum1.html http://hometown.aol.com/didoangst/myhomepage/photo.html
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-24-2003
Sat, 10-09-2004 - 2:58am
Thank you rj. And thank you for thinking of me. That was a warm fuzzy for the day.

I think I will treat myself to a new pair of walking shoes since that will be a new daily routine for me.

I know ting is the cute shoe expert, but I figure you are the athletic shoe expert. Any suggestions would help. I plan to go to Dicks maybe.

Hugs,

Laurie
Laurie

My web pages
http://homepage.mac.com/lauriedav/PhotoAlbum1.html http://hometown.aol.com/didoangst/myhomepage/photo.html
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-24-2003
Sat, 10-09-2004 - 3:14am
Thanks nelle,

What fear did you go through 18 years ago? I hope it is ok to ask?

Is everything ok now?

I know you have a wicked sense of humor so I will share this story.

When we found out that I was in "CHF" (LINGO)

I wanted to take some videos of my dogs etc, but the motor on my camera is not working so it will be cheaper to by a new didgital video camera.

So I said, "Mom, since I am sick, and might not be here for Christmas you could buy me a new camera now maybe,

and my dad said, Heck if she won't be here for Christmas, save the money and buy her one of those throw away cameras.

Dad and I had a good laugh and mom got upset with us for making jokes about it. So things are staying pretty normal here. lol.

Hugs,

Laurie
Laurie

My web pages
http://homepage.mac.com/lauriedav/PhotoAlbum1.html http://hometown.aol.com/didoangst/myhomepage/photo.html
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-24-2003
Sat, 10-09-2004 - 3:22am
Thanks cat,

Yes it is good to have you all here at LL.

My g/f is so good to me I don't think they get any better than her.

She is very supportive and will not let me get to down.

I must have done something right to have her in my life.

If ~S~ is like that then you are very lucky too...

Heyyyyyy wait a minuet, ~S~ and Sheila? Hmmmmmm... could it be the same pers... nawwwww

I watch to much court tv. lol

Hugs,

Laurie
Laurie

My web pages
http://homepage.mac.com/lauriedav/PhotoAlbum1.html http://hometown.aol.com/didoangst/myhomepage/photo.html

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