Giggling schoolgirls?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-24-2003
Giggling schoolgirls?
50
Tue, 10-26-2004 - 3:52pm
My day... (we need an eyeroll icon!)

I am in a training class for a position with the state. When hired, I told the interviewer (my supervisor was one of the interviewers, a woman who was retired was assisting her) that I was a transsexual. Our class is training in an adjacent building to where we will work, and we are now... 12 days into training. Today my supervisor asked to see me, and she outlined how there are rumours circulating about me. She was an absolute sweetheart, and was very upset with this happening, that I was one of the ones she insisted on hiring, and she does not wish me to leave. She told me they were calling a meeting to tell everyone it was none of their business, and I would assume remind them of what being professional means and what state regulations are. She also told me that if anyone gives me a hard time to let her know, because it is discrimination.

Wow. I don't wish to be the cause of problems, just wish to do my work, be a good person and colleague, and the only way to win them over is to do and be just that.

How they know is uncertain... the only way people can tell usually is by my voice, if power is required behind it it will give me away. There are 5 women and 2 men in my class, and of all of us... one guy is from the department where this started, and they were having him take this class... there was something about his attitude that seemed off, though I could not put my finger on it... how he interacted with our trainer, his insistence on breaks, etc... like an institutionalised employee. Where I come from, there was no such thing as breaks, though when working for myself worked late and took breaks when I felt the need.

I talked with the women in my training class, explained what was happening, they were all wonderful... spoke with the trainer and she wanted to choke someone. So while this is only speculation, speculation I'll only share with friends, family, or in this way... this is a shining example of how some guys are so damn immature about human sexuality, it's like they've never gotten past 16. And to think there is a stereotype of giggling schoolgirls... I submit that there are giggling grown men out there as well.






Edited 10/26/2004 3:56 pm ET ET by rayeellen

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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-15-2004
Fri, 11-05-2004 - 8:31am
Said gently~~~~~~

>>>>I too think we're all bisexual to some extent<<<<


I know for myself that I am not bisexual. I know exactly what I am. Although I have a friend that is bisexual and I respect that.




Edited 11/5/2004 9:34 am ET ET by igentleheart

 


Hugs,


Sebastian


 


http://www.facebook.com/sebastianbruce

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Fri, 11-05-2004 - 9:06am

Well, you're entitled to your opinions.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Fri, 11-05-2004 - 9:08am

I have "known" Raye for a long time and would never have had an inkling that there were gender issues if she had not told me.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-24-2003
Fri, 11-05-2004 - 2:38pm
Thanks! Someone on another board had a signature I really liked... "i became gay the same day you became hetero..."

In reality, we are all unique creatures, and how we get here is unique... this uniqueness is what makes life so damn interesting!

Don't be too hard on yourself... I have run into women who tear themselves to shreds due to guilt over what they feel inside. You seem like you do fine, but for anyone who does struggle... please! post about how you feel so that your sisters can be here for you!


Edited 11/5/2004 3:41 pm ET ET by rayeellen

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-24-2003
Fri, 11-05-2004 - 2:48pm
Thanks Pam! The thought of me as a guy was hard for me too! Seriously, thinking back on my life at 6 or 13 or 16 or later... those school years were *very* tough. I spent a whole lot of time worrying about being laughed at if found out, of even being sent to a state hospital. My dad told me I was sick at 6, and that stayed with me, the knowing that something was wrong, and not acceptable to society.

School days were spent with that fear, but alternating with daydreaming. I think most lgbt people have wonderful imaginations, it is a release that allows us to overcome not being able to be who we are inside, and that was me all the way. Daydreaming and wishing to fit in also means you aren't doing in school what you are supposed to be doing in school. I was an average student grade wise, but... like so many, grades hardly matched what I'm capable of, for the above reasons. This is why it is so important to me that we make things better for our young, so that they can be who they are and thrive.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-03-2004
Fri, 11-05-2004 - 9:02pm
i'm ok. thanks for sharing, raye... i really did need to understand...
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-03-2004
Fri, 11-05-2004 - 9:04pm
gak, didn't mean to offend anyone here. i just, if there's one thing about me is that i tend to just say what i think... and i haven't learnt to *edit myself aw much as i oughta... cheers, pam.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-03-2004
Fri, 11-05-2004 - 9:12pm
i will keep in mind the things i learn here... i used to not be very tolerant of ppl very different from me, if they don't get me, or i don't get them within a certain time frame but i'm trying to be more patient--i think this is a big weakness here, that's why i ask so many qeustions, and try to undertstand stuff. this helps, raye...

cheers, jules.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Fri, 11-05-2004 - 9:22pm

You didn't offend me not_str8.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-03-2004
Fri, 11-05-2004 - 10:11pm
okies! n/t

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