Mommy Vs. L Word

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-05-2004
Mommy Vs. L Word
10
Wed, 02-02-2005 - 8:55pm

I'm wondering what others think this may suggest...


Tonight I invited my Mom to catch a glimpse of what really goes down in the world of Lesbianism...About a month ago I came out to her and so far I've been impressed with how she's handling things.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-10-2004
Wed, 02-02-2005 - 9:44pm

My mother has never said the "L" word, let alone watched the show !

 

 

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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-05-2004
Wed, 02-02-2005 - 9:51pm

~~LOL~~


I think you're right... I'm being to hard on poor ol' mommy!

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-15-2004
Wed, 02-02-2005 - 11:08pm

So far she is handling things very well IMO!


Don't cross bridges until you get to them. Like Barbara said, that generation is going to be hard to convince that being a lesbian is about alot more than sex.


Sandra

Sandr

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-29-2004
Thu, 02-03-2005 - 12:34am

R2L

Give her time it's all new. I really think that when she becomes confronted with your life, that her views might change when it hits home. For now, the show caused her to react, and those are people who are not real to her. When she really likes your partner, and sees the love first hand; I think her opinion will change with time. For now, count the blessings that she came to be with you and watched the show. Wow. So, don't worry about mom. Stirring the pot was a great way of finding out where she stands. Now you have some control of where you take it next. You could have a family like mine; their only claim to fame is that they have a sister who's gay! woo hoo! lol

hugs
halo

hugs

halo

Avatar for themadhugger
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-21-2003
Thu, 02-03-2005 - 6:57am

Hey there!


I think you are sooo lucky that your Mom is at least as accepting as she is.

*hugs ~ Caly

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-23-2005
Thu, 02-03-2005 - 8:23am
You've gotten some great advice so far. I also think it was smart of you to sort of "feel your mother out", in a way. Now you know that she does have some underlying issues, which opens the door to discussion between you and her (once she is ready for that, of course). I commend your mom also on setting her beliefs aside for her daughter. That really says alot about her character, and gives hope that someday she will accept your lifestyle for what it is.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-31-2005
Thu, 02-03-2005 - 9:43am

You are very lucky to have a mom who is so understanding. I came out to my parents almost two months ago, when my divorce began. It all happened very fast and was forced, definitely not the way I wanted it to happen. My parents have been absolutely incredible, though. I'm sure your mom is still adjusting to finding out you're a lesbian. She's also probably struggling a bit inside to reconcile the difference between who she thought you were and who you really are. I have been talking with my parents about it in bits and pieces, and most of all I have shown them how important Caly is to me. I don't think you did the wrong thing by inviting your mom to watch the L Word with you, but it probably triggered something that she's been thinking about but hasn't come to grips with yet.


I'd look for openings and opportunities to bring up your being gay in a subtle way. Watching the L Word was a good way to introduce her to the community, but I wouldn't be worried or get too upset if she has a similar reaction to something like that in the future. Sounds like it's just gonna take some time, but she'll come around.


Hugs!


iVillage Member
Registered: 07-24-2003
Thu, 02-03-2005 - 10:26am
I think my mom still thinks I am going through a phase also and I came out to her over 6 years ago. I was pregnant when i did so that made it a little less believable. She accepts it but is unsure if it is true. She went through a "phase" and thinks everyone does. as far as being a Mommy... I just had my 2nd 6 months ago with Brandi and both of our immediate families are very supportave but some extended arent so. In fact, my aunt (crazy aunt shirley) told me that God was gonna take her from me for doing such an irresponsible thing...blah,blah,blah! I say if God didn't want me to have her I wouldnt have had her! I have said that from the beginning. I wasnt sure if I could even have more babies cause I had a miscarriage between my kids. It took me a long time to even try but as soon as I did I got prego the first time! And now I have the 2 most beautiful kids in the world. I think we are good moms! Even Jeremy's dad told what a good job raising him we are doing...now that says something. He wouldnt have said that a few years ago! Not that what "he" says matters but it makes me feel good for anyone to say it!
Moms need a little time to adjust to new things in their kids lives. Give her time, it already sounds like you have come farther with her than most would and she seems to be doing better with it than most would! So good luck and keep an open mind to what she thinks also. It is new to her.
mandi
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-05-2004
Thu, 02-03-2005 - 11:36am

Thanks for everyone's advice.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-01-2004
Thu, 02-03-2005 - 8:10pm

My Mom watched the last episode of The L Word with my g/f and I.

Scarlett
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