After eight months...
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After eight months...
| Tue, 03-15-2005 - 2:11pm |
After eight months of waiting for Ashley for make a decision about what she really wants; it looks as though she has.
| Tue, 03-15-2005 - 2:11pm |
After eight months of waiting for Ashley for make a decision about what she really wants; it looks as though she has.
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Wow, what a hard and painful situation. I can understand not wanting to be someone's second choice. And yet I imagine it's very hard to let go of a relationship that has meant so much to you. Sounds like you are trying to look at this with your head instead of letting your heart overwhelm you. I think that is a wise thing, and yet such a difficult and painful one as well. I wish I had some good advice on boundaries for you. Unfortunately, I do not. If I were in your shoes, I think I would have to put some space between me and the other person for a while ... because it would be too hard for me not to slip back into our old ways and accept that place of second choice, even if knew it would always bother me. But maybe you are stronger than that -- it sounds like perhaps you are. So I guess all I can really offer is good luck. I hope you find the way that is best for you.
Jules
Jules
This just stinks, all around. I don't know you, Scarlett, but I sure feel for you. I do know that I, too, am not as strong as you sound. I would definitely need to set some serious boundaries, in an attempt to keep from going back to the place I once was...that is IF I decided to go that route.
I don't know what else to say. I do not post very often, because I feel I seldom have very good advice, and I unfortunately don't at this time either...however, I felt an urge to respond, because your post really hit home, and I am so very sorry.
~P2JoJo
She needs to get over Kelly before she can give herself fully to you or anyone else.
Or did she choose Kelly out of guilt. Due to the family thing.
Maybe you should find out. Or just keep her at bay while she gets over Kelly before she comes running to you.
I am glad that you will not be second choice, that would always make you wonder wear you stand with her.
Keep us posted. Sorry it has become so painful.
Laurie
co-cl of Lesbian Life Message Board
Email- didoangst@comcast.net
http://messageboards.ivillage.com/iv-bhlesbianlif/
http://homepage.mac.com/lauriedav/PhotoAlbum1.html
Thank you ladies for your support and kindness, (as usual.)
Re:
Scarlett
my blog
Scarlet, one of the greatest lessons learned in life is that we don't always get what we want. This seems to apply to all three of you. Kelly is finally moving on with her life (without Ashley), and now it's time for you to do the same. I'm sorry, but I just can't shake the feeling that Ashley has been stringing both of you along all of these months until she finally felt pressured into playing eenie-meenie-miney-moe. Noone deserves to be treated like that (whether intentional on her part or not)!
My advice as far as boundaries? Harden your heart girl, do whatever it takes not to fall back into the old routine. If you choose not to eliminate her from your life entirely, it will be hard. You will never really know if you are her
(((((((Scarlet)))))))
I'm so sorry to hear that things have come to this.
Pieces of My Life
{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}
~Ginny~ <-- Click to send me email
((((((((((Scarlett))))))))))))
I am so sorry sweetie. AlL I can say is "never settle" You can do better.
I know this must be so hard for you, but please look after you first.
Sandr
Ya know Hon, you have been kinda letting it go as
C >^. A .
This could be right on. It is possible that she new Kelly had enough and wanted Kelly to end it so she knew for sure it was over and she could feel guilt free to be with scarlett. Very astute observation Lee.
Of course you always seem to know people's hearts so well.
Laurie
co-cl of Lesbian Life Message Board
Email- didoangst@comcast.net
http://messageboards.ivillage.com/iv-bhlesbianlif/
http://homepage.mac.com/lauriedav/PhotoAlbum1.html
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