What would you choose?

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-24-2004
What would you choose?
20
Thu, 08-04-2005 - 2:36pm
If you woke one morning with your fairy godmother standing over you giving you a choice to be re-born again - being able to plan your life out step by step - would you? What would you plan for your life to be like? Or would you stay in your life as it is now? If you planned to stay...WHY?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-24-2004
Fri, 08-05-2005 - 12:59pm


I'm very sorry if I have offended you in any way. I didn't reply to offend anyone. I also have been in a straight relationship. In fact I've been married. And at that time I had two children. That wasn't a easy time for me at all. In fact it was a very trying and sad time for me. But everybody's life is different. And no matter what at some point in time they go through it.

I didn't and wouldn't say you said that (I've never typed that someone gay is in a lower class.) I just know from experience that there are people out there that feel like that. That if people (friends) cannot except you for you - then you do not need them.

You just sounded sad to me. (and I hate to see people sad) You never know what life will bring to you (right ****:) Any way - love will find you when you least expect it!! And you best is all that should be expected from you.

Again sorry!

Hugs!

Angel

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-04-2005
Fri, 08-05-2005 - 1:00pm

Great question and fun to think about!

If you woke one morning with your fairy godmother standing over you giving you a choice to be re-born again - being able to plan your life out step by step - would you? What would you plan for your life to be like? Or would you stay in your life as it is now? If you planned to stay...WHY?

I would certainly be reborn. I would plan it so that I would start doing my stand up right after highschool. I would not listen to everyone else and do what they wanted me to do. I would not worry about pleasing everyone else, I would do more to please myself. I mean as far as living my life in the direction that I wanted to go not the way other's wanted me to go. By now I would be having and/or writing for my own sitcom. Do I ask for to much?
I would still be a lesbian.

Hugs,
Laurie
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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-24-2004
Fri, 08-05-2005 - 1:11pm


That's a thing I'm trying to work on myself at the moment. (listen to everyone else and do what they wanted me to do). It really hard. I think that would be one of the things I would ask for. And no if you have the chance you better ask for even more. LOL

Angel

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-04-2005
Fri, 08-05-2005 - 2:49pm
Yessss, it is time for you and I to take charge! Of ourselves!
It seems in my case it would be career or relationship everytime. G/F's do not like me traveling and being away as much as I need to be when doing stand up comedy.
So, this time I chose the g/f. I can't seem to have both. And the parents always asked, "When do you plan on getting a real job."
Oh, but I'm not bitter. lol.
Hugs,
Laurie
Check out my new blog.
co-cl of Lesbian Life Message Board
Email- didoangst@comcast.net
http://didoangst.blogspot.com/
http://homepage.mac.com/lauriedav/PhotoAlbum1.html
Hugs, Laurie Check out my new blog. co-cl of Lesbian Life Message Board Email- didoangst@comcast.net http://didoangst.blogspot.com/ http://www.4-lesbianlife.com/
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-29-2004
Fri, 08-05-2005 - 5:54pm

If you woke one morning with your fairy godmother standing over you giving you a choice to be re-born again - being able to plan your life out step by step - would you? What would you plan for your life to be like? Or would you stay in your life as it is now? If you planned to stay...WHY?

I would not change anything in my life. From the moment I was born, I was destined to be exactly where I am and I do not regret what I've been through. Every experience has molded me into the person I want to be. I believe that every time I feel (dé cha vue)sp happening around me, that is a sign that I am exactly on track with the path my life takes me. I have actually used those moments to change the outcome because I recognize and know what is going to happen next! lol This time I am making better choices and growing daily.

Girl friends/husbands have never controlled my destiny...That's not to say that I am pushy commanding or controlling, I believe that if you are not satisfied or happy with your life and what you are accomplishing with your life, then no relationship is going to be fulfilled no matter who you are with. I have never been in a relationship where someone has dictated to me what I can do or not do! Never compromise who you are and you should never allow your partner to settle for less and you should never stop them from pursuing their dreams! Life happens only once and girl if you're not taking advantage of the time you have available to do what makes you happy, then that is sad.

Thanks for the question.

hugs
halo

hugs

halo

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-29-2004
Fri, 08-05-2005 - 6:00pm

RJ,

If you want the good fairy/godmother, whatever, to change your life then go for it. :) Just make sure when she makes you straight that she takes that desire to be with a women away from you! lol Even living as a straight woman for 12 years, I wasn't able to shake that feeling when I saw a girl that caught my eye! lol You are right it's easier to be a straight person, especially if you don't have those emotions tugging at your heart and you don't have society snubbing their nose at you. Being gay and living straight in a heterosexual relationship is dang difficult. So have her take those feelings away as well, and honey if that's what you would like to happen, you have my total support and understanding. ;) Albeit, this great wonderful Lesbian world will lose one gorgeous smart loving person named RJ! ;)

hugs
halo

hugs

halo

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-03-2005
Fri, 08-05-2005 - 6:45pm

I must have mistook her question. I took her question as one of you choosing to stay the way you are or choosing a different life. If I were to be reborn straight, then yes I would want to have desires for a man if I were a woman or vice versa. I personally was thinking more along the lines of being reborn as a straight man. I'm not interested in giving birth to a child. But, I think it would be nice to have a family.

I was married for 6 years. I could not remarry a man now because I know that I'm a gay woman. And, that's not going to change. I don't plan on trying to change myself. However, if I were to have been given a choice before birth, knowing what I know now, I would probably choose a white straight man's life.

I think I'll avoid questions like this from now on. LOL

rj

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-03-2005
Fri, 08-05-2005 - 6:51pm

I apologize for the confusion. (((((Angel)))) there's no need for an apology from you. I didn't want people on this board thinking that I thought gay people are of a lower status. That's why I commented back on that.

In the ten years I've been divorced, I've had more men than I can count on both hands ask me out. I've had zero women who've had an interest in me. So, that's why I don't have my head in the clouds thinking Ms. Right is just around the corner. After that long of a period of time, you begin to lose interest and hope. You know, if I can just get my career on track, get a dog, a house, and some friends, I'll be more happier than I am now. So, that's my real focus at the moment.

take care,

rj




Edited 8/5/2005 7:25 pm ET ET by andie_grrl
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-29-2003
Sat, 08-06-2005 - 2:43am
Well I read all the posts

 C  >^. A .

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-30-2005
Sat, 08-06-2005 - 5:46pm
I would not be reborn, and I would not want to live my life over.

Carol,  In love with the most beautiful woman in the world.

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