OK I'd like some input.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-18-2004
OK I'd like some input.
10
Sat, 10-08-2005 - 3:13pm

I had posted here last winter/spring, my screen name was bpd_stef, I love the writer's nook ;)


OK, long story short, I was always attracted to women, my earliest sexual memory was exploring bodies with a girl my age, we were 9. I have only had relationships with male partners, 3somes with women, I consider myself bi,

Stephanie

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-01-2005
Sat, 10-08-2005 - 3:20pm

welcome .......

and well just my 2 cents ...I have known I was a lesbian since I was 23....I am now 31....I have never completely been with anyone yet...male or female....

for me well I was never comfortable around guys and well even though I can find attractive features in almost anyone,I was never attracted to men...
also I was never comfortable or at ease with any man....

with women well my girlfriend drives me crazy....her giggle...her smile...the first time I looked into her eyes....her heart....her everything....

the first time I kissed a woman I knew....
I felt all the emotion I only thought happened in movies.....
and well i am sure the first time I make love it will be mind blowing....

so well my answer ,yes you can feel you are bi- or gay without having sex for I knew the first kiss I had and well I know I have no doubts on my sexuality....

hang out for awhile.....see how you like the boards....Jo

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-15-2004
Sat, 10-08-2005 - 3:22pm

Hello Stephanie, How are you? It's good to see you. Well, to tell you the truth, I believe that you can be a lesbian without having sex with a woman. For me, being a lesbian means that I can love women, hold them in high regard, adore them, and have a woman to be my choice of my love and affection. But, in my opinion, and that's all that it is, I love making love to a woman, but the sexual part of loving a woman is not all that there is.

So, only you know for yourself what you are. It's ok to question yourself about your sexuality. So, hang around, and have fun, and continue to ask questions. Of course, there may be more answers coming that I can give you, as everyone has their own opinion.

Hugs!

 


Hugs,


Sebastian


 


http://www.facebook.com/sebastianbruce

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-18-2004
Sat, 10-08-2005 - 3:26pm

Thanks, I plan to stick around. I love your writing by the way.


:)


Stephanie

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-18-2004
Sat, 10-08-2005 - 3:28pm

Thanks, I appreciate your kind words, I plan to be a regular!


Stephanie

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-15-2004
Sat, 10-08-2005 - 3:43pm


Thank you, Stephanie. :)

Hugs!

 


Hugs,


Sebastian


 


http://www.facebook.com/sebastianbruce

Avatar for nursepam2000
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-30-2003
Sat, 10-08-2005 - 8:09pm

>can I be a lesbian, without ever having made love to a woman?


Absolutely Stephanie.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-23-2005
Sun, 10-09-2005 - 6:48pm

Hi Stephanie! Always nice to see you.


I agree with all of the input you have received thus far. To me, there is only one definition for the term "lesbian", and that is an unconditional love for the female gender.


I was asked once if I was a lesbian because I hated men. My answer was no, I am not a lesbian because I hate men. I am a lesbian because I love women. There is a difference.


I hope you enjoy the bar next weekend. Do return and let us know how it went! Also best of luck with the mommy group.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-18-2004
Sun, 10-09-2005 - 7:09pm

Thanks Pam, I hope to find, but I have to get off my butt, and leave my little bubble to get what I need IRL, I have been isolating myself, and with good reason, but now it's time to reach out, I have BPD a mental illness, and it causes relationships to be complicated by my fearful heart, I am finally ready to venture out and test the waters.


Thanks,

Stephanie


Recovery, as we currently understand it, means growing beyond the catastrophe of mental illness and developing new meaning and purpose in one’s life. It means taking charge of one’s life even if one cannot take complete charge of one’s symptoms…. Recovery is a deeply personal, unique process of changing one’s attitude, values, goals and skills and or/roles.

Stephanie

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-18-2004
Sun, 10-09-2005 - 7:10pm
Hi Beth, I'm glad to

Stephanie

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-04-2004
Sun, 10-09-2005 - 10:20pm

What counts is what is inside of you, not your life experience. If you are just admitting to yourself now, out loud, that you are attracted to women, of course you could be. You are the only one who can answer the question, providing you dig deep and don't try to fool yourself. Follow your heart...


*hugs*

So much stays unknown 'til the time has come,
Did you ever imagine you could feel so strong,
And what you fear just turn into relief,
Yes see your doubt become your own belief



Pass In Time