Thursday Thoughts... Kids w/ 2 Moms.....

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2006
Thursday Thoughts... Kids w/ 2 Moms.....
29
Thu, 03-08-2007 - 7:33am

Morning Everyone!


Wow, Last week's thread was awesome! It took off like a rocket, so thanks everyone for your input.

 PPCLSIG.jpg picture by CalyD44

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Avatar for why1040
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
Thu, 03-08-2007 - 6:43pm

Well, I don't have kids, and I've never dated anyone who has kids. I'm not really fond of small people, I prefer furbabies! I'm not sure how much I can add to this conversation, therefore.

I do know of friends who have kids. One has teens and the other smaller people. The one with teens has made it very clear to her kids that she's gay, and has then left it up to them how they deal with it themselves, though they know she's always there for them. I suppose it helps somewhat that the daughter is also a lesbian...lol

The one with younger children hasn't really told her kids. She had a gf for a while, and their kids used to play together, but they never really discussed the relationship as such. When one of her kids asked why the gf was staying over in her bed, my friend asked if she should've expected her to sleep on the floor...LOL

I don't know how much of an issue it would be at school and such here. Since there is some legal protection, I suppose I wouldn't be as worried as I might be in other situations, but at the same time, bullying in schools here is not always very well dealt with, so it would worry me more that there would be an extra reason for that, I suppose.

Hugs,

Chris

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-05-2006
Thu, 03-08-2007 - 9:55pm

Hey...


Good question. To be honest I have no idea how I am going to approach this. I worry about this happening also. We have not explained our relationship to my son...but he thinks of us as a couple but really doesn't understand what he knows.. I guess.. I have been leary of discussing with him yet due to I know that he will talk to his Dad about it... I really do not how to do this... I would love to hear how others have approached this. If it wasn't for his Dad I would have this conversation with him and help him to understand.


Thank you for starting this thread....


hugs,


Brenda

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2006
Fri, 03-09-2007 - 7:08am

Hi Chris!


Thanks for your input.

 PPCLSIG.jpg picture by CalyD44

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2006
Fri, 03-09-2007 - 7:10am

Your welcome Brenda and I will add my thoughts to your questions tonight, Hehehe we have to get the Girls to school this morning! LOL


Talk to you later

*Hugs


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 PPCLSIG.jpg picture by CalyD44

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-15-2004
Fri, 03-09-2007 - 7:50am

Rose and I each have two children.

Jules

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-24-2003
Fri, 03-09-2007 - 9:58am
I think the cruise idea is great! How awsome that will be. You will have to give us a full report on that when you return. The kids should have a great time with it too.
Hugs,
Laurie
Laurie

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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-24-2003
Fri, 03-09-2007 - 10:12am
We do not have any kids of our own, but Sheila has 11 neices and nephews and they all know.
We have been together for 10 years now. two of the kids are in college and the others range in ages from 8 - 19.
She is Go mother to the youngest and the oldest.
They all seem to treat us both like they do the other aunts in the family and I like that.
I do regret not having kids of my own now, but my biological clock has run out. Plus Sheila has never wanted to have children. They make her nervous. We do love kids but just do not have our own.
So not sure I fit this discussion very well.
I do think I would want my kids to know as early as possible so they would be used to it by the time the reached that teenager stage. I think the younger they are the more accepting they are. That does not mean I would flaunt it in their little faces. I would just want them to know who their two mommies are and that they live as a family just the same as if there were a dad in the house etc. I would also want them to know so that both parents would have the same respect when it came to dicsipline (sp) etc.
However, I am not sure how I would go about it if there was a real father in the picture as I have been gay all my life and never did get involved in any serious guy relationships.
Not sure I am making any sense or should be even participating here. Just writing my thoughts.
Hugs,
Laurie
Laurie

My web pages
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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-16-2005
Fri, 03-09-2007 - 10:23am

From the first time you posted, I could tell that you and Rose are both great moms. Sounds like you are on target with how you've handled this with your kids, and I think it's great that you were friends for so long, which gave your kids a chance to get to know Rose and vice versa.


I hope you guys have a wonderful time on the cruise!


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Registered: 12-15-2004
Fri, 03-09-2007 - 4:09pm
Thanks Ting.

Jules

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Registered: 02-15-2004
Fri, 03-09-2007 - 5:07pm

To the the newbies that may be lurking, please just read. Thanks.

In one of my past relationships, I was a "dad" for a short period of time. Of course, I would have enjoyed raising our daughter. Of course, at some point she would have been curious as to where her biological father is, and we would have been more than happy to tell her.

Of course, if I became involved with a woman that does have kids, I would make sure that they understand me, of course, kids and teenagers are well aware of different sexual orientations these days. I feel it's always best to answer questions as honestly as possible, but appropriately. But I have been involved with a woman, before my transition, that has a son. We had to become comfortable with each other, and after a really bad incident, he respected me, and I respected him.

He's still cool with me, but unfortunately he followed his mother's footsteps.

Great topic,

Hugs,

Sebastian

 


Hugs,


Sebastian


 


http://www.facebook.com/sebastianbruce

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