Thursday Thoughts......the Workplace....
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Thursday Thoughts......the Workplace....
| Thu, 04-05-2007 - 7:01am |
Well we have mentioned this is most of our previous Thursday Threads, I think its time to devote a whole Thread to it.
So what is it like where you work?

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As for myself, when I go and start building my dream career, I know that my outward appearance may be or may not be confusing. When I begin school again, I will be around a much more advanced generation when it comes down to accepting transexuals. I also know that there will be other gay, lesbian and bisexual students and staff.
There may be some hesitancy about the acceptance of my prescence, but I can't be concerned about that. I must focus on my studies. As far as instructors are concerned, to them I'm just another student. Now, when the time comes and when I'm comfortable with it, I will come out to my instructors. Of course, when it comes time for me to legally change my name, they will be aware of it, and I will assist them in remembering it.
When I finally reach my career, a Drug and Alcohol Counselor, I can't assume any instant acceptance, that would be unrealistic. But, with each new group of people that I come across, getting to know everyone and letting them get to know me, will be an ongoing process.
Great question, and I'm looking forward to the other responses also....
See ya,
Hugs,
Sebastian
Hugs,
Sebastian
http://www.facebook.com/sebastianbruce
As you know, it has been an horrific month for me. I came out to my best friend with whom I work and was in love with, in front of her husband. This was awful. Almost in the same breath, I came out to two other co-workers that are close friends. That went well. My love(friend) outted me to another mutual friend and I was horrified, although the friend was fine. I'm having dinner with her tonight. I think I have mentioned this before, but I am not permitted to speak, email (home or work), call, or text her(the love). I have gone far enough through the greiving process that I am sometimes angry, but still so hurt by this that it reduces me to tears.
I can't come out, yet, generally, because I think my husband derserves to know before the WHOLE world knows, except you you guys.
We have one out bisexual on staff and since the faculty thinks I am "safe," I hear all the little comments and innuendos about her. I can't face that right now. I have asked my friends who know on staff not to change anything or tell anybody else to stop their behavior because they know and I might be offended. I would rather know who the bigots are up front than wonder what people are really like. Boy, will they be surprised.
Sorry for the rambling. Really good thread, though.
As a nanny, I really don't think I have the option of not being out unless I want to be totally secretive about my personal life or flat-out lie about a lot of things. I believe it's CRUCIAL for me to have an open, honest, friendly relationship with my employers for the sake of the child(ren). I had a past position where I did not have this kind of relationship (not due to anything regarding my sexual orientation, I just didn't like the parents) and it was really hard on me emotionally. I dreaded going to work and I never felt like I could trust them.
Therefore, when I interview for jobs, I'm always upfront about my sexuality. I make sure to bring it up at some point during the job interview process (usually during the face-to-face interview, which is generally the final step -- by that time I know if I'm interested). I know it's possible that it might cost me a job at some point, but not a job I could be happy with, so the sacrifice is worthwhile. So far though, I've never interviewed for a position and not been offered the job, so it doesn't seem to be a problem.
In fact, my sexual orientation was a BONUS for my current employers. They are a same-sex (male) couple whose son was conceived via an egg donor and a gestational surrogate. They had extremely high standards regarding experience, education level, references, etc. And on top of that they needed to find a nanny who was truly comfortable with their family. Not just someone who was tolerant, but someone who truly accepted their family. Because they knew it would be difficult to find exactly wha they wanted, they started looking for a nanny before Henry was even conceived. When I sent them my resume, they were impressed. When I told them I was a lesbian, they were beside themselves with joy. They made it clear that they wanted me and would do whatever they needed to do to get me. The salary negotiation phase was hilarious because rather than countering any of my requests, they gave me MORE money and benefits than I asked for. They let me choose my start date. They gave me an ungodly amount of paid-time-off during my first month of employment. etc. etc. etc.
We are a perfect match, and this is by far the best position I've ever had. They are wonderful employers and I'm sure they'd have treated any nanny wonderfully, but I know they are particularly pleased to have me. People in this area are generally very accepting, but they do have to tolerate some ignorance, like the pediatrician who repeatedly referred to Henry as adopted. I know what that stuff happens, they find comfort in coming home and venting to me and just knowing that I understand completely and I don't need them to explain why they are frustrated.
As a bonus for me, I've learned a lot about the legal process involved in using donor egg/donor sperm and second-parent adoption, etc. Most of it is stuff I've read about already, but it's different when you are living it day-to-day. So I feel more prepared for my own journey into parenthood once Jamie and I ready to start our family.
I'm home with our youngest, but my wife is out at her work (teacher).
Ramblin is good Blue.
Hey Annie, Thanks for your reply.
I myself have ended up with a fairly unique situation at work.
Thanks, of course, it's constant self acceptance and knowing that no matter what, I have to be me.
Hugs,
Sebastian
Hugs,
Sebastian
http://www.facebook.com/sebastianbruce
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