coming out..

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-01-2007
coming out..
5
Wed, 05-02-2007 - 12:06pm
iam a 39 year old woman and lesbian and am still the closet in way..Which means i have to do everything secret cuz, of where i live..Most ppl who know me or see me know what i am and tolerate me cuz i have done anything like, hold my girlfriend's hand in public..I really can't hide who i am..as you look at me you know what i am..Iwas thinking of coming out but i don't know if i should risk it..By coming out i mean going out with my girlfriend and holding hands..what do you all think? Should i risk it..?
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-24-2003
In reply to: twomoods
Wed, 05-02-2007 - 1:28pm
I would not risk it if it is possibly dangerous where you live. I would keep the public displays behind closed doors.
You seem to already be out if ppl already know. I would say play it safe for now.
You have to think of your g/f too and her safety. I would not want any trouble from anyone.
Laurie

My web pages
http://homepage.mac.com/lauriedav/PhotoAlbum1.html http://hometown.aol.com/didoangst/myhomepage/photo.html
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-16-2005
In reply to: twomoods
Wed, 05-02-2007 - 1:38pm

Welcome, twomoods! So glad you posted! Your situation is difficult. Caly (my co-CL and partner) are in the same boat, although she is out to most of her co-workers. I think you need to follow your instincts. We live in TN, and homosexuality is not accepted here for the most part. I have two DDs in school and am very careful about doing

Photobucket


iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2006
In reply to: twomoods
Wed, 05-02-2007 - 5:45pm

Hi and starrywelcome.jpg


It does sound like you are very much like me.

 PPCLSIG.jpg picture by CalyD44

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2007
In reply to: twomoods
Wed, 05-02-2007 - 8:58pm

Hey, twomoods. Welcome. I, too, am way in....a few people have found out recently, due to extenuating circumstance. Of course, everybody here knows!! I have worked a long time in my job and made many contacts and relationships that could be harmed by coming out. I am also married, so that is another issue. I do not have a gf presently, but I am holding out hope for the future. You are lucky to be with somebody you love!

Examine your work, social, family, and other contacts. Are you really ready for them to know. If you are, then go for it. Think about the reaction of all those you love around you. Are you ready to accept the repercussions of your actions (both good and bad)? Your friends will stay, others will not. Protect your partner. What will happen with her situation. Is she ready for you to be out and thus possibly outing her?

Good luck and hope to see you back.

Blue

BLUE DIA
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
In reply to: twomoods
Thu, 05-03-2007 - 12:03pm
I say if you feel up to it, why not? Why let a lovey dovey moment with you girl slipped away? Anyway, you did say "as you look at me you know what i am..", How does your g/f feel about holding hands in public? *smile*