How do I unhook?

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-05-2007
How do I unhook?
72
Thu, 06-07-2007 - 6:29pm
How to I let go. I am getting bogged down in too puch pain. I think i need to watch it or I will be in not a good place by October. Any tips. I go from denial (holding on to the idea she will come back) to grief to confusion. I feel I need to talk to her. It is driving me crazy. She asked for NC. I should honor that? Do email her BFF who knows it all and ask for a phone call? Do I just decide it is over? Can you tell I am confused and hurting. Ugh. What do i do?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-05-2007
Sun, 06-10-2007 - 3:47pm
Oh yeah I need my head straight! Heart mended. LOL! What did i say...lol! Cant remember, hope it was good!
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2007
Sun, 06-10-2007 - 4:25pm

Yes, it was, thank you very much.

Cooling off, now. Literally and figuratively. lol

Great weekend.

Blue

BLUE DIA
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-05-2007
Sun, 06-10-2007 - 4:54pm

I am glad you had a great weekend. Mine was worked packed. Some of it stressful. I did not relize how much pain i am carrying around. But staying busy keeps it in a little box.

I wonder if she thinks about me. I wonder if she is relieved it is over or if she's moving towards me. Or if she misses me? Blah blah blah, yada, yada, yada. I was talking with DH today about it and said, sometimes you just feel that energy, when someone special pops in your life and you were meant to have a significant connection, you get that feeling. That feeling of "this is a special conncetion" ---not neccessarily romantic per se. I had that feeling early on with her. I think that is why it is so hard to let go.

So tell about yours. Your weekend....if you want.

hugs

Roxy

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2007
Sun, 06-10-2007 - 6:02pm

Roxy, I posted most of my weekend on another thread that I can't find. Came out one of my best friends of 20 years. Had a major crush on her in my 30's. She's as straight as the night is long, however.
She was driving when I told her and we are lucky we didn't crash. Drank a little too much last night, but didn't compromise myself in any way. My friend left early this morning, before I had a chance to say goodbye. She was driving to NC (that's North Carolina, not no contact lol)
She had asked me if I was happy and I told her that I was happier than I had been in years. Then I asked her if there was anything I could say that would ruin our friendship. She said only if said I had been sleeping with her husband. I cracked up and said THAT would never happen. Then I told her. She asked me questions on and off while we shopped. I asked her not to tell her dh or any of our girlfriends 'cause it was my story. I think she had a mindfreak on the way home and I am planning on calling her tonight. Then I'll know if it really makes a difference. I am coming to terms with the fact that I might lose some friends in this, but I am gaining so much more.
Never did get to the beach, but I am okay with that. Not much of a tanner or swimmer. Walked around town for awhile, but Bethany Beach is not the gay haven that Rehobeth is. Nobody special caught my eye.....

Thanks for asking

Hugs

Blue

BLUE DIA
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-05-2007
Sun, 06-10-2007 - 7:05pm

Thanks for sharing... i am going to see if I can find your other posts. I hope your friend handles things fine. I really do. You are right to have expectations that you will win some and lose some. The good ones will stay with you!

Hugs
Roxy

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-24-2003
Sun, 06-10-2007 - 7:42pm
You see, you two, I am not the only one to see what is developing here... between roxy and Blue. Even if it is just for fun for now you never know one day... at least it might take your minds off of the other women who are doing you no good.
Right, Cat?!
Plus you need some fun and excitement.
Hugs,
Laurie
Laurie

My web pages
http://homepage.mac.com/lauriedav/PhotoAlbum1.html http://hometown.aol.com/didoangst/myhomepage/photo.html
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-24-2003
Sun, 06-10-2007 - 7:53pm
I feel bad for you for that. It is like no excitement there for you in that relationship. I think men are just like that until they are going to lose something. They get so blah about it.
I think you look great! And you will have a fun time in lesbian land, haha.
Hugs to you!
Laurie
Laurie

My web pages
http://homepage.mac.com/lauriedav/PhotoAlbum1.html http://hometown.aol.com/didoangst/myhomepage/photo.html
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2007
Sun, 06-10-2007 - 7:57pm

Well, you guys can always use your imaginations.... ;) I think you enjoy the fun and excitement vicariously. NOTHING wrong with that, baby!!!
But, you are right, you never know what will happen. Long distance things can be tough, but Caly and TiNG prove that it is not impossible. Just a good time right now.

I am done, I tell you, with the other one. Done, finished, and I am working up a hate, which takes a lot of energy, BTW. Hating is not for the faint of heart. I have only hated one other person in my life, and that is long past. It's just too much work and they don't care, anyhow. There is only this little niggling in the back of my mind that says, "What if she crooked her finger,and said 'come on over here'." Would I go or stay put? Today, I would stay put, maybe. Oh, heck, I don't know what I would do, but at least I would hesitate. She has really pissed me off!!!!! At least I am in a good place right now.

Hugs to all,

Blue

BLUE DIA
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2007
Sun, 06-10-2007 - 8:03pm

Our relationship has been way too easy for him all his life. To be honest, it was convenient for me at the time. Movin' on up to the big time......

Lesbian land??? Is that like Candyland, Disneyland, New Zealand, Auckland, Fantasyland??? Do I need tickets or just get the wristband when I enter the park? I'm not much for the rides that scare the crap out of you. I like the ones that get you wet, and the ones that are just fun to be on. Amusement parks are not my style. Please tell me it's more like Candyland....Chutes and Ladders would be okay, too. Fantasyland would be my ultimate choice, however. ;)

Hugs and Laughter

Blue

BLUE DIA
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-24-2003
Sun, 06-10-2007 - 8:14pm
Blue,
Lesbianland is what you make it, it is up to you, that is the cool thing about it. The rides depend on your partner some too, lol.
It sounds like you had a pretty good weekend after reading your other posts. Good to hear that.
Sounds like you arecoming along pretty well in ref to the Ice Princess.
I hope you would choose not to go to her, she would freeze the life right out of you.
I would say a few other things, but I must keep TOSS in mind. Haaa haaa.
Hugs and laughs,
Laurie
Laurie

My web pages
http://homepage.mac.com/lauriedav/PhotoAlbum1.html http://hometown.aol.com/didoangst/myhomepage/photo.html

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