Update on my K

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-05-2007
Update on my K
16
Mon, 07-16-2007 - 3:24pm

So my friend (My K)...i call her my friend now. She may be looking at a separation. Her H gave her a talk last night and said something has got to give. She cried, i cried. I am so worried for her.

We wont have contact for a while again...i am okay with that. I want her safe. I just realized how deeply i love her...i dont want her to hurt..about anything. I suggested couple's counseling. I am so, so worried for her.

Nothing to do but pray and pray.

(worried) sigh

Roxy

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2007
In reply to: roxy_blue
Wed, 07-18-2007 - 9:20pm

Sometimes, sweetheart, you just have to protect yourself. You can do it consciously or unconsciously. You were pretty broken up before, if I remember. Try not to get caught up, although, I know that is hard. Be patient....

Hugs

Blue

BLUE DIA
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-05-2007
In reply to: roxy_blue
Wed, 07-18-2007 - 9:22pm

Thanks so much Blue. Wise words. I am a bit more detached. Work is keeping me busy. My heart feels a little numb. I really appreciate your sweetness.

Roxy

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-24-2003
In reply to: roxy_blue
Wed, 07-18-2007 - 10:02pm
Awwwww (((((Roxy)))))
That is sweet of you. Maybe you have protected your heart so that you won't be so hurt anymore.
I think you deserve to protect yourself. If your feelings change for her then that is ok because maybe eventually you can become friends.
If they don't change and remain romantic feelings, maybe she will come to you after she realizes things won't work with the dh.
You will have to give this one some time and give your heart some protection.
Hugs,
Laurie
Laurie

My web pages
http://homepage.mac.com/lauriedav/PhotoAlbum1.html http://hometown.aol.com/didoangst/myhomepage/photo.html
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-05-2007
In reply to: roxy_blue
Wed, 07-18-2007 - 10:12pm

Thanks Laurie!! But secretely...I HATE that i am protecting my hear! Yes i know, goes against logic, but i dont want to harden up. I want to have a soft big compassionate heart. I hate that I am feeling shut down a little. I am confy with feelings, even sad one. I dont like myself feeling luke warm. You know I do care about her. We will always be friends. I think she loves me. I see it now. Maybe I am scared and dont feel worthy...I cant quite get a handle on why i feel this way...and that is bugging me.

....Or maybe it feels bad to be out of touch again...and have no control over that and I am protecting myself...I dont want to grow J A D E D.

Feelings and the ability to have the courage to be VULNERABLE and OPEN and fearless of heartbreak are important to me somehoe.

Well see what happens...maybe I am just scared. She has two little ones under 12...Yikes. That is a lot of responsibility. I chose not to be a mom...well porbably because I am a female GAY person..he he he...(meaning, i could not see me getting pregnant by a man)...funny how my biological clock tick around butches...weird, Huh?

Roxy...

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-24-2003
In reply to: roxy_blue
Wed, 07-18-2007 - 10:34pm
Lol about your biological clock ticking around butches.
You can protect yourself and still feel feelings just not so deep that you can't function at work etc. You know when all you do is think about that person and situation that everything else becomes a chore. That is just not good to have to go through.
I hope you don't shut all the way down, but I really think you are just protecting yourself for this round because you were hurt so bad the last time.
Hugs,
Laurie
Laurie

My web pages
http://homepage.mac.com/lauriedav/PhotoAlbum1.html http://hometown.aol.com/didoangst/myhomepage/photo.html
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-05-2007
In reply to: roxy_blue
Wed, 07-18-2007 - 10:53pm

"I hope you don't shut all the way down, but I really think you are just protecting yourself for this round because you were hurt so bad the last time."

Oh yeah, that is it 100%...I dont want to get hurt...i was on the floor rolling around crying. Geez..I am such a girl...LOL!

Hugs

Roxy

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