letting go of family life

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2007
letting go of family life
16
Fri, 07-20-2007 - 5:28pm

So, this weekend is the annual camping trip we always take with several other families. We've been doing this for years, and have so much fun together, watching our kids grown. So my dh decided not to go. It's a good idea we don't go together. I've decided to take the older two kids and leave the little one with him.

I need to get away and I know the kids will really have fun. However, I'm not ready for everyone to ask where dh is. I will have to lie. I can't say "Well everyone, sit down by the fire and let me fill you in on my life. I'm a FGP and my marriage is over. Pass the marshmallows". No, can't do that. So lying it is. However, I'm a terrible liar. On the drive over the hill to the beach (I'm looking forward to that) I will be practicing my lying face. Because I'm so raw, I figure everyone will know. But I'll probably pull it off.

Also, I'm feeling sad, as I just realized for real that our family life is over. Or at least for now. Maybe someday we can come together as a family for somethings. But for now, it's no longer. It is a great loss, I can't pretend it isn't. I'm trying to hold onto the greater picture, but it can be hard. So hard to see the future. Where's my crystal ball?

AAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!

Just a good scream. Gotta get packing more stuff into the truck. Thanks for listening FGPs and gentleman. We need a good acronym for Sebastian. If he wants one.

Hugs and smores,

Passion

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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-16-2004
Mon, 07-23-2007 - 9:29am

Passion,

It is going to be a long ride of ups and downs but you will make it. I left my marriage 3 1/2 years ago. I wont go into all the deatils ( unless u r interested) but here we are now and our relationship is great. He does attend any functions that involve the kids and all of his family attends as well...we work hard on that part! My partners family has not been so acepting however...talking about giving up family life! She has had it rough and it breaks my heart to see her suffer and the way they treat her. We never know what to expect from them one day to the next....bottom line, our relationship will "NEVER" be ok. She is finally fed up...the hurt is gone and the anger has set in. It has been over a month since she spoke with her mom ( the longest ever) and several months for some of her siblings and they live 10 minutes from us.

So....the moral of this story...do what makes you happy! You cant spend your life worried about everyone else. We have wasted a lot of time trying to do that. Love your kids and and they will love you back, no matter what!

Daronda

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2006
Tue, 07-24-2007 - 7:09am

Hey Daronda!!

 PPCLSIG.jpg picture by CalyD44

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-16-2004
Tue, 07-24-2007 - 7:39am

Thanks Caly...I am trying to come around more. I have a lot going on right now and am having a hard time dealing with it...good days, bad days, ya know?? I know I should come around more cause you guys always make me feel better, its just that I get tired of being a downer all the time so I try to pop in only on those good days...I am usually always lurking though.....:-)

Daronda

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-16-2005
Tue, 07-24-2007 - 9:52am

Good to see you, Daronda! Don't worry about not being positive all the time. You can pop in anytime, no matter how you feel. We've got lots of hugs to give out.


Take care!


Photobucket


iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2007
Tue, 07-24-2007 - 11:02am

Hi Daronda. Thanks for relating your story. Why can't families just love us? So darn stupid. I would love to hear more about your story sometime. I can't even envision a "partner" right now. It's all so cloudy. All I can do is breathe-and barely that.

So busy right now. I'll check back in later

Hugs,

Passion

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-16-2004
Tue, 07-24-2007 - 11:31am

Passion,

I would love to chat with you sometime off list if you like. I dont want to fill up this space with stories everyone has already heard...LOL!! So...if ya want drop me a line and we can chat!!

Daronda

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