I Live A Reality Show

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2007
I Live A Reality Show
53
Mon, 08-20-2007 - 7:05pm

The big day, as you know was, Friday a week ago and the weekend was just horrific and yet it was great. A weight has been lifted from me. I was so worried about my ds. He is speaking to me and cares a great deal. He is out in CO with dd and I am sure they are doing what they need to do to come to grips with a lesbian mom and the changing of the family as they know it.

Since then, the whole family knows, my dh outed me to his entire worksstaff AND all of our couple friends that were originally his friends. My family is good, his is not, but they are not that bad either. My mother in law told everybody that "she has known for years." She's always like that and always will be, so I just let those things tug at me for the moment and then move on.

I have come out to all of my bosses and the last one is kind of where I am with her own husband, without the lesbian thing, I think. We have lots in common. She is about my age and is experiencing similar things like she loves her husband, but is not IN love with him. She asked me what I told my husband and we spent an hour in her office BSing.

My dh came home today and told me he had taken wire cutters and removed his wedding band, his mom wants my wedding band back and she is entitled to it, but it feels bad, and he is talking about getting an apartment as soon as we sell the Florida home, possibly in about 4 months. I would, of course, be responsible for "not my damn dog" until my ds can take him. I would need help for this.

This is really hard as many of you have said. There is not much community here, but I have made some pretty good contacts and will keep going. It's going a little faster than I had anticipated. Dh is the driving force. I guess in my head I thought this would all play itself completely out after I had retired, but it looks like other forces will be intervening.

Goddess love all my friends who have been checking up on me, some of you here at the board, either by phone, email, or postings. I am sad right now, but I think that is to be expected as you move through these kinds of events.

Many hugs all around

Blue Sue

BLUE DIA
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-17-2007
Tue, 08-21-2007 - 7:29pm

Your sharing your journey helps me be aware of decisions around the next curve on my road. Those decisions are a long way off right now, and I'm just getting started. Your support and that of all the other incredible people here is a great gift and blessing!

Knowing how much time you spent carefully exploring yourself and figuring out what you wanted before making decisions, helps me to be careful, too. To be sure of myself first and what I want out of the rest of my life.

Even with all the trepidation I feel right now, there is this little bit of secret happiness and a glimpse of positive energy glowing deep inside me. Big breath. One step at a time. ;)

ML


ML Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-29-2003
Tue, 08-21-2007 - 7:44pm
Het Eastie...

 C  >^. A .

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-17-2007
Tue, 08-21-2007 - 7:45pm

*waving Thank you! Hello back! :)

ML


ML Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2006
Tue, 08-21-2007 - 8:13pm
You may 'give up' some things but I truly feel you Gain soo much more... 8-)

*Hugs


Caly_moon2_a.gifpentagram


 PPCLSIG.jpg picture by CalyD44

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2006
Tue, 08-21-2007 - 8:15pm

How about having a thread like a soap opera?
each one pick up as the last one finish posting a message?
what story we can tell and share with each other. *L*


We did something like that once before and it was fun.

 PPCLSIG.jpg picture by CalyD44

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2007
Tue, 08-21-2007 - 9:19pm

Sorry :( You are too funny, though. You make me laugh and I need a whole bunch of that right now.

Hugs

Sue

BLUE DIA
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2007
Tue, 08-21-2007 - 9:22pm

Yeah, one step at a time. I find taking 15 steps at a time really hard. lol
I'm Phys. Ed., so I suppose I could do it, but what throw my back out??!!

Just injecting a little lame humor here, ML.

Go at your own pace. Welcome to putting your toe out of the closet. My toes hung out for a long time. I say "Hang Ten!"

Hugs

Sue

BLUE DIA
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2007
Tue, 08-21-2007 - 9:23pm

***Raising my glass to salute you!"""

Hugs

Sue

BLUE DIA
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2007
Tue, 08-21-2007 - 9:28pm

Start benign, babe. My mind can twist the simpleist stuff. I also know from you being gone and the poles coming out, there are many people on this board with similar thought patterns. I was such a baby and a newbie back then. Rogue, Cat, Storm, Laurie, Rowan, SEB, and all the rest who were there then raised me up right!

Hugs

Sue

BLUE DIA
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2007
Tue, 08-21-2007 - 9:30pm

Geez, that was supposed to read "Why throw my back out." I can't even make a joke tonight. Laurie, you better take over in the comedy department.

Blue

BLUE DIA