I Live A Reality Show

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2007
I Live A Reality Show
53
Mon, 08-20-2007 - 7:05pm

The big day, as you know was, Friday a week ago and the weekend was just horrific and yet it was great. A weight has been lifted from me. I was so worried about my ds. He is speaking to me and cares a great deal. He is out in CO with dd and I am sure they are doing what they need to do to come to grips with a lesbian mom and the changing of the family as they know it.

Since then, the whole family knows, my dh outed me to his entire worksstaff AND all of our couple friends that were originally his friends. My family is good, his is not, but they are not that bad either. My mother in law told everybody that "she has known for years." She's always like that and always will be, so I just let those things tug at me for the moment and then move on.

I have come out to all of my bosses and the last one is kind of where I am with her own husband, without the lesbian thing, I think. We have lots in common. She is about my age and is experiencing similar things like she loves her husband, but is not IN love with him. She asked me what I told my husband and we spent an hour in her office BSing.

My dh came home today and told me he had taken wire cutters and removed his wedding band, his mom wants my wedding band back and she is entitled to it, but it feels bad, and he is talking about getting an apartment as soon as we sell the Florida home, possibly in about 4 months. I would, of course, be responsible for "not my damn dog" until my ds can take him. I would need help for this.

This is really hard as many of you have said. There is not much community here, but I have made some pretty good contacts and will keep going. It's going a little faster than I had anticipated. Dh is the driving force. I guess in my head I thought this would all play itself completely out after I had retired, but it looks like other forces will be intervening.

Goddess love all my friends who have been checking up on me, some of you here at the board, either by phone, email, or postings. I am sad right now, but I think that is to be expected as you move through these kinds of events.

Many hugs all around

Blue Sue

BLUE DIA
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2007
Tue, 08-21-2007 - 11:28pm

I too like local brews. We have some local breweries here. Actually, at the mall just across the street from my apt there's a brewery/restaurant with great beer. I like the blondes-beer not babes.

Hugs,

Louise

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Wed, 08-22-2007 - 1:14pm
Run with it if you want, Cat.
It will be interesting to read what you come up with or expend on it. *cheshire cat smile*
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Wed, 08-22-2007 - 1:17pm

Rogue, Cat, Storm, Laurie, Rowan, SEB, and all the rest who were there then raised me up right!

==========

I still have tears in my eyes knowing our little girl is grownin up so fast in this world. *grin*

Is she in school or did she gratuated, Ladies? ;-)

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-16-2005
Wed, 08-22-2007 - 2:16pm

Yep! I think she graduated with honors!


Photobucket


iVillage Member
Registered: 06-24-2003
Wed, 08-22-2007 - 3:17pm
< Yeah, one step at a time. I find taking 15 steps at a time really hard. lol
I'm Phys. Ed., so I suppose I could do it, but what throw my back out??!! >

Ok, blue, you are doing fine in the comedy department but I will give you a little advice... Since you sort of asked me to take over and I don't feel taking over is fair...
When making a mess out of a joke, also known as a "bomb". It is best to either let it go and quickly move past it or if you want to go back and redo it redo it a bit differently.
like so...
OH MY!! That last joke was supposed to read, "I find taking 15 steps at a time really hard, I am phys. ED., but why break my bum?"
The word bum being a funnier word than a$$ because it is not used as much and is more of a surprise word than a$$.
Say the word bum... c'mon... say it... it feels funny doesn't?
Bada boom bada bing!
Hugs
Laurie
Laurie

My web pages
http://homepage.mac.com/lauriedav/PhotoAlbum1.html http://hometown.aol.com/didoangst/myhomepage/photo.html
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-05-2007
Wed, 08-22-2007 - 8:25pm

Just checking up and catching up. I am so proud of ***YOU**. You sound amazingly strong and centered. Wow!!! I think you are taking all this better than i thought.

I had to clear my cookies and for the life of me could not remember my pass word...HA

Glad to be back.

BIG HUGS (((BLUE)))

Roxy

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2007
Wed, 08-22-2007 - 8:35pm

Thanks, Roxy. I have missed you.
Sometimes I am really strong and centered and sometimes I am just awful. Being out is such a relief and so terrible all at once.
Tonight is one of those nights where I just need to be held tight. Yesterday sucked. Today was fine, but tonight I am sad inside.
My dh is amazing me. He has gone from don't leave me ever, we can live like brother and sister forever....to....I'm working on the finances, we're selling the FLA home(I was counting on that for next spring for my umping in FLA), and I'm moving out as soon as I can get things in order and find an apartment. Get the divorce started. It's all just a little too quick for me.

I'll live. Life is an adventure and I am on the Mr. Toad's Wild Ride or whatever that Disney thing is. lol

Hugs

Blue

BLUE DIA
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-05-2007
Wed, 08-22-2007 - 10:05pm

Awwww ((((BLUE))) Consider yourself hugged and held tightly...(((blue)))

"Being out is such a relief and so terrible all at once" Yes... it will get better, worse and better and better still.

Your DH sounds normal considering...expect him to be all over the place.

I am sorry you feel sad tonight. Get rest, get enough good food, (i dont have to say exercise). Take vitamins...this is such a stressful time.

I am going to try and get caught up some more.

You hold on to you! It will be okay...in the end.

Hugs
Roxy

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2007
Thu, 08-23-2007 - 7:28am

Catching up with all the new threads and people will take some doing. My advice is to check a few and let the others go. You didn't know there were even hear when you weren't posting...

Today is a new day with new adventures. I was wondering out there if any of you felt differently with other people after you came out. I have begun to have a different sense of how I fit into everybody's world now that they know. I think this will pass in time (lots of time as this plays out), but I was wondering if it s a natural reaction.

Hugs and glad you are back.

Blue

BLUE DIA
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-05-2007
Thu, 08-23-2007 - 8:00am

Good advice to just the things be and not try to get caught up!

Yes, i felt different after i came out. Especially after I came out to H! After 2 weeks or so, i felt free. I could breath. Of course H was very loving and accepting.

My hope for you is that you have gentle people around you to support you and love you thru this. I wish everyone in your life was supportive.

Hugs

Roxy