some progress..

Avatar for mschiffven
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-25-2003
some progress..
13
Sun, 08-26-2007 - 11:44pm

Finally!! We got the school to come up with what we have been asking for some time now. When my son was originally beaten on the school grounds he was unable to identify any of his assailants as he was knocked unconscious before he could get a look at them.

We have asked the school since then to provide us with photos of these boys so at least H has an idea of who to look out for.

He was assaulted again on the way home from school on Thursday, completely out of the blue so he didn't even see it coming. We have pressed the school once again for photos of the boys involved. I got flicked off to someone by the principals secretary so my GF tried and she was angry enough that she got to speak to the principal himself.
He agreed that it would be in my son's best interests to see photos of these boys and he forwarded them to me. (My son didn't go to school today as I was not home to drive him and he was too afraid to walk).
From the photos, both my son and I were able to positively identify the guy who assaulted him on Thursday as the same guy who was charged with his assault at the school.

This boy has a family group conference tomorrow where he has to face up to his victims -Hamish is afraid to attend, he has written a victim impact statement which my GF will go and read. He also committed burglary offenses and will face up to the victims of those.
The youth aid officer is pushing for a community sentence with strict boundaries but considering his assault on my son on Thursday, we will be pushing for a custodial sentence.

Off to feed dogs. Send lots of "lock up the little prat" thoughts tomorrow....


visit my web site

Pages

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-05-2007
Mon, 08-27-2007 - 6:29am

Good for progress...and feeling for your son. How awful to have to feel *so* afraid.
Can he get counseling very soon? I hope things resolve for your son very soon.

Can the police be involved so that his "identifying" the attacker is documented by officials and investigated? IT is puzzling...why is you son not being taken seriously since attack happened months ago? Why were photos or trying to ID who did this not happen soon after attack where your son's statements had more power?

Was second attack reported to police? "From the photos, both my son and I were able to positively identify the guy who assaulted him on Thursday as the same guy who was charged with his assault at the school." I am so afraid because you and your GF seem to be investingating yourselves...it might not the same have weight...as if the police had formalize the IDing process of the attacker. Were you present at the second attack were you also saw the boy....if you were, perhaps you could show up and give your testimony more weight since you son wont be there. I will be holding my breath...wishing good results. Let us know what happens.

Hoping for the best

Hugs

Roxy

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2006
Mon, 08-27-2007 - 7:05am

Yeah! Glad to hear it Ven!

 PPCLSIG.jpg picture by CalyD44

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-16-2005
Mon, 08-27-2007 - 8:25am

Glad you are finally making some progress on this. I haven't been around much but saw your posts about H. How horrifying. I hope he will be ok.


Hugs


Photobucket


iVillage Member
Registered: 06-24-2003
Mon, 08-27-2007 - 9:12am
Hoping the little brat gets locked up...
Hugs Laurie
Laurie

My web pages
http://homepage.mac.com/lauriedav/PhotoAlbum1.html http://hometown.aol.com/didoangst/myhomepage/photo.html
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-29-2003
Tue, 08-28-2007 - 3:35am
Why that bullie bratt Prat!~ *Smiles.. Here's wishing he gets what he deserves..
I am glad you and g/f have gotton thus far and of course ~H~ is leary of going out and to school.. Just please keep yourselves safe and yes as another poster asked? How come the school didn't notify you sooner of this?.. That stinks..
You all be careful..
((((Hugs across the miles))))


 C  >^. A .

Avatar for mschiffven
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-25-2003
Tue, 08-28-2007 - 6:16pm

thanks Roxy- my son does have counselling available at school though at this stage chooses not to take advantage of that. I will give him a few more days to process what has been happening this week and then talk to him again about what counselling can do for him.

We called 111 on Thursday when he was assaulted. He was dropped home from school by someone who witnessed the assault- a woman unknown to any of us who happened to be driving by. As soon as he got home and gave me a description of the guy, I got in my car and set out to track him down. I found him about a block away from where it happened and followed him in my car. The guy crossed the road in front of me on two occasions and I got a really good look at him. I was following him, expecting a police car to be sent out so I could flag them down and say that's him just there... but no police showed up. He took a short cut through an alley in an area I am not familiar with so I lost him after about half an hour. I don't believe the boy knew he was being followed. It's not that he is not the sharpest knife in the drawer- he is more like the spoon in the knife drawer!!

When I lost track of him, I returned home only to be told that the police were sending out a car in another hour or so. Two young cops attended and I got the feeling they were not serious about following this up. The general assumption seems to be that living in a decile 1 sort of neighbourhood, you learn to live with violence. We mentioned several times that we needed to know if this incident was related to the boy that assaulted H at school. They left without even giving us any contact details.

The family group conference was yesterday morning. The point of it was to see if some conclusion to the situation could be agreed upon between the families. His mother wanted my son to apologise (duh!), blamed my son for everything that had happened, blamed my son's friends for not stopping the assault before my son was seriously injured -he was unconscious for at least 5 minutes and was in and out for at least another 20 or so minutes (double DUH!), both mother and son feel the boy was in the right.
My girlfriend got a bit angry at this but kept her head and pointed out that at each interaction with her family members- THEY approached my son, not the other way around. My son got up to apologise for the incident with the younger brother the day before and was knocked out before he could say anything. As far as we are concerned, the apology expired at about that point!
During the course of the conference, my GF tricked the boy into admitting the second assault on Thursday. The police representative present was appalled at the way the incident had been handled by the police. The boys admission cannot be used as what goes on during the family conference is confidential but both my son and I gave a fairly accurate description of him before we knew who he was and there was also an independent witness who should have no trouble picking him out if she was shown photos. This assault cannot be taken into account at this time, but he will be facing further assault charges.

The outcome of the family group conference was that no agreement was likely to take place between the families due to the hostility of the offender and his mother- the boy appears in court again on Friday to have bail conditions set. He lives 2 blocks away from where we live, so it's going to be difficult to impose restrictions so he avoids my son. Following his bail hearing, there will be another family group conference. I think the second one is to work out how the boy should be punished- as a custodial sentence for a 14 year old is highly unlikely unless he actually killed someone.
Then of course, he goes back to court to face charges of a second assault. Will keep you posted...


visit my web site

Avatar for mschiffven
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-25-2003
Tue, 08-28-2007 - 6:46pm

We have laid complaints with the Education Review Office over how the whole incident has been handled. When this happened, the school should have called the police and an ambulance. They didnt. My partner and I were out for lunch- my phone rang but we were in a noisy cafe and by the time I heard it, they had hung up. They then phoned my girlfriend but her answering service picked it up before she did. We both had to go outside to hear the messages we had been left (my caller id told me it was the college ringing) and all they said was that my son had been in a fight, he will probably need to see a doctor and if we couldn't come and get him, don't worry, they will arrange something.
They phoned the parents of the boys involved with the view of getting them off the school grounds as quickly as possible. Before they left the school, the all wrote statements- sitting at the same table in the same room!
We arrived at the school, were walked PAST these boys to get to the medical room. I was expecting to see my son with maybe a black eye and a bleeding nose. One whole side of his face was bruised and swollen, one eye was swollen shut (and stayed that way for 4 days), he was dizzy, his speech was slurred, his lip was cut, his nose was bleeding profusely - they had put his arm in a sling and his shirt was covered in blood. I took him to the hospital and my partner went to police station to lay assault charges.
The police were horrified the school had not called the incident in. A similar event occurred at another school earlier in the week, the police attended, the offenders arrested and held in custody which expedited the court hearing. I think as the college (college=high school where we live) has a new principal, he tried to avoid that kind of publicity.
The police went to the school but of course the offenders had been sent off elsewhere. They took statements from those present and then had to go off and find the others. They couldn't interview my son until he was coherent enough- which was the following day.
This all slowed down the process so much- then as the main offender is only 14 years old- the whole thing was transferred to the youth justice system and when we chased it up, we were told it takes time with an "historic" assault. That made me angry- it's only historic because they have taken so long over it!!

The school refused to provide us with photos of the offenders originally. I think they were worried they were in breach of the privacy act. They may also have assumed that my son knew who they were- he only recognised one of them who he thought was the one who had hit him first, but apparently he wasn't. It's only since we have complained to ERO about the incident and expressed concerns about my son's safety at school that they sent us the photos. (once again, I think the new principal is trying to avoid negative publicity)

Anyway, all this happened back in May. My son was off school for 6 weeks. He had multiple hospital visits for his broken nose and broken clavicle, he had to be assessed by the concussion clinic, he has had multiple police interviews, dental visits for loose teeth, vision checks... yet he remains fairly upbeat about it all. I am very proud of how he has coped through it all. He is determined to remain at the school until he graduates, he wrote a very strong victim impact statement and is working hard to catch up on his school work. I am confident he is going to be ok.


visit my web site

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2007
Tue, 08-28-2007 - 7:01pm

As I have been following this thread and the other, I am so angry and shaken. I can't believe all this is happening and it is just so weird. I am pissed at the police, at the school, at the other family. I don't know what to say. This is a bad thing from the beginning to the end and I am so sorry that your ds and your family has had to endure this. I'm thinkin' about ya.

Hugs

Blue

BLUE DIA
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-05-2007
Tue, 08-28-2007 - 8:17pm

Lost my longish post to you!!! Aww i am sorry you did not get better results...the mother sounds C R A Z Y !!!

No wonder the kid is messed up.

Hugs

Roxy

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-05-2007
Tue, 08-28-2007 - 8:53pm
Gosh Mschiffven! How frustrating! Ugh!!! Hope it will sort itself out for you!

Pages