It's hard not to feel guilt

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2007
It's hard not to feel guilt
12
Thu, 09-27-2007 - 2:59pm

So you all I know I came out to my mom this week.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-15-2004
Thu, 09-27-2007 - 4:06pm

 


Hugs,


Sebastian


 


http://www.facebook.com/sebastianbruce

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-16-2005
Thu, 09-27-2007 - 4:12pm

(((((((Amy)))))))))


It will take some time, but it sounds like your parents love you unconditionally and because of that they will come around. They WILL see how happy you are and realize the effect that has on the kids. Give them some time and space. I know it hurts, but I truly believe it will all be ok.


Big hugs to you


Photobucket


iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2007
Thu, 09-27-2007 - 4:47pm

((Amy Louise))


Yep, you are right. They need time to process. You are now an official FGP and they need to come to terms. It's not really about them, this is all about you. I know that they need to make themselves "right" with it and they will. They should grieve about the end of your marriage. If you put anything into it at all, it is like a death. Hell, I'm grieving about mine. Then they will grieve for the "old" you until they come fully to know the new you.


Don't feel guilty, however. Sometimes I feel more guilty about the life I led in the closet, than in the life out. I consciously fooled a lot of people along the way. I felt that I did it for my own protection, because of the time, place, and situation I was living in, but I still sometimes feel the guilt about that. I wish, in this case, that I had been born about 10 years later than I was. It might have been easier, but maybe not. Who will ever know.


Major hugs holding you close


Thelma Sue

BLUE DIA
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2006
Thu, 09-27-2007 - 6:37pm
I agree with everyone and I think they need time.

 PPCLSIG.jpg picture by CalyD44

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-22-2003
Thu, 09-27-2007 - 7:37pm

You can not feel guilty for who you are, just for things you have done...coming out is nothing to feel guilty about. Being who you are is nothing to be sorry for and allowing your children to know who thier mother is, is not bad.


It sounds as though your parents love you and they will realize that no matter what, you are the daughter they love.


I came out later in life and my sexuality is never the subject of conversation with my parents...not because they have a problem with it...just because it isn't on the forefront of any of our minds. They love me, I love them and thats all there is to it.


I wish you luck and hope that you learn to lose the guilt for being who you are.


Nora

 
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-24-2003
Thu, 09-27-2007 - 7:57pm
((((( Amy ))))) You are out and some people will take time to process this. It usually gets better with time as they realize that you are the same person they always new. Just be you with them and they will see. You might have some changes that come with your freedom. But all in all you are still you.
And now you are not living a lie to those you love and know and now they know the real you through and through.
No more secrets or lies. That should take some of the guilt away.
Just give them time to process.
Hugs,
Laurie

My web pages
http://homepage.mac.com/lauriedav/PhotoAlbum1.html http://hometown.aol.com/didoangst/myhomepage/photo.html
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2007
Fri, 09-28-2007 - 9:18am

Thanks so much Sebastian.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2007
Fri, 09-28-2007 - 9:23am

Hi TiNG.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2007
Fri, 09-28-2007 - 9:28am

Thelma Sue-you are such a sweetheart.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2007
Fri, 09-28-2007 - 9:30am

Hi Noralouise.

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