Sounds like your marriage ceremony was beautiful, Picture. Caly and I did something similar, just the two of us on the beach. It was beautiful. We have had vows that we say to each other periodically. They are very special to us and mean so much.
Like you, I don't think it's reasonable to assume that when we're given the right to marry, divorces won't happen. We're no different than heterosexuals. We have feelings, emotions, and many of the same issues that they do. It's bound to happen.
My present thoughts are that ALL people should have legally binding civil unions that last unconditionally for 25 years. The only way out of this one is to prove some kind of abuse, unfaithfulness, danger that exists for children, or a gender identity/orientation issue. Disinterest doesn't count. You made your legal bed, now lie in it. After 25 years, you can then renew the contract on a one or two year basis. If you do not wish to renew, both people knew in the beginning that the deal would only last 25 years and they should be able to part with no animosity. Shoot, you don't like 25 years-take twenty then. I chose 25, because if there are children, this will take most people to about the end of raising the kids.
Marriage, on the other hand, should be a spiritual ceremony. It can be, but certainly doesn't have to be, performed in a church or temple. It can be on the beach, in the woods, in your bed, in a reception hall, whatever or however you feel.
Now, you know I haven't worked this all out in my head. It's just the musings of a confused lesbian on life's journey. I do know that I want to be committed to somebody in my future, make it legal, say the vows, and live happily ever after with my princess. My lawyer, on the other hand is all for gay marriage. It will mean more money for him with the divorces that will follow. Lawyers---it's all about the money.
I do believe that all couples should have the same rights when they commit themselves to each other. But, I don't care what you call it. Civil union, domestic partnership, marriage........in my mind it's all the same principle. I'm thankful that Shelley and I were able to register as domestic partners but it still burns me up that it's not recognized anywhere else. Here in CA starting this year domestic partners have to do state income taxes together. I'm curious to see if that will ever flow over to federal. Not anytime soon I don't think because then they would have to recognize gay unions in some form. I do believe I will see that in my lifetime.
When Shelley and I became domestic partners it was wonderful. No ceremony, no big to do....but it was a special moment for us. Did it change us? Not really........we both already considered ourselves married before we were. The only change is we have some legal protection as a couple now.
It depends... it can be a cop out, or it can be a first step. I helped write our union policy on same sex marriage, and we debated this very issue. A couple of legislators stopped by to say the votes were there in the legislature for marriage, but the governor would not sign, given the political pressure from
"What I'm sadden to learn is that the people that fought for the rights to marriage are getting divorce after a few years."
But that is the point..or so i thought...that gay and lesbians can have the same rights as hets. That they have the right to make the same darn mistakes...and consequences. And
Pages
Sounds like your marriage ceremony was beautiful, Picture. Caly and I did something similar, just the two of us on the beach. It was beautiful. We have had vows that we say to each other periodically. They are very special to us and mean so much.
Like you, I don't think it's reasonable to assume that when we're given the right to marry, divorces won't happen. We're no different than heterosexuals. We have feelings, emotions, and many of the same issues that they do. It's bound to happen.
It's very complicated, that's for sure.
Hugs,
Sebastian
http://www.facebook.com/sebastianbruce
Really good question.
My present thoughts are that ALL people should have legally binding civil unions that last unconditionally for 25 years. The only way out of this one is to prove some kind of abuse, unfaithfulness, danger that exists for children, or a gender identity/orientation issue. Disinterest doesn't count. You made your legal bed, now lie in it. After 25 years, you can then renew the contract on a one or two year basis. If you do not wish to renew, both people knew in the beginning that the deal would only last 25 years and they should be able to part with no animosity. Shoot, you don't like 25 years-take twenty then. I chose 25, because if there are children, this will take most people to about the end of raising the kids.
Marriage, on the other hand, should be a spiritual ceremony. It can be, but certainly doesn't have to be, performed in a church or temple. It can be on the beach, in the woods, in your bed, in a reception hall, whatever or however you feel.
Now, you know I haven't worked this all out in my head. It's just the musings of a confused lesbian on life's journey. I do know that I want to be committed to somebody in my future, make it legal, say the vows, and live happily ever after with my princess. My lawyer, on the other hand is all for gay marriage. It will mean more money for him with the divorces that will follow. Lawyers---it's all about the money.
Hugs
Blue
Oh, yeah. When I
I do believe that all couples should have the same rights when they commit themselves to each other. But, I don't care what you call it. Civil union, domestic partnership, marriage........in my mind it's all the same principle. I'm thankful that Shelley and I were able to register as domestic partners but it still burns me up that it's not recognized anywhere else. Here in CA starting this year domestic partners have to do state income taxes together. I'm curious to see if that will ever flow over to federal. Not anytime soon I don't think because then they would have to recognize gay unions in some form. I do believe I will see that in my lifetime.
When Shelley and I became domestic partners it was wonderful. No ceremony, no big to do....but it was a special moment for us. Did it change us? Not really........we both already considered ourselves married before we were. The only change is we have some legal protection as a couple now.
Shannon
I understand some in our community feels like second class citizens when it comes to the issue of marriage but I don't feel that way.
It depends... it can be a cop out, or it can be a first step. I helped write our union policy on same sex marriage, and we debated this very issue. A couple of legislators stopped by to say the votes were there in the legislature for marriage, but the governor would not sign, given the political pressure from
worlds undone
"What I'm sadden to learn is that the people that fought for the rights to marriage are getting divorce after a few years."
But that is the point..or so i thought...that gay and lesbians can have the same rights as hets. That they have the right to make the same darn mistakes...and consequences. And
Pages