Help--what's wrong with me?

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-03-2003
Help--what's wrong with me?
3
Thu, 04-03-2003 - 6:48pm
I'm a 26-year old woman and for the last 4-5 years, I have been having these bouts (anywhere from one to several throughout the day) where I feel tense, restless, and just plain irritable. Most recently it's been right around 3pm. I'm a receptionist and right around that time, usually until I leave at 5pm, every time the phone rings, I feel so annoyed I just want to fling the phone through the window. I don't even know why. It's not as if the people that call are rude, most are perfectly polite, but I just don't want to deal with anybody at that moment for some reason. Then yesterday, I was expecting a package, nothing urgent, just something I had ordered from the internet. It didn't come and I got so mad I started cursing and threw a shoe at the wall. I don't get it. I called UPS today and found out the person who sent it didn't put down my apartment number. It's being delivered tomorrow and everything's fine. There was absolutely no reason for me to get so angry. It happens over the most ridiculous things. As far as my job, I'll admit I don't like it, and would like to get into something else but college in this state is outrageously expensive, plus I just moved to this state and have to live here for at least a year to be considered a resident, or I'd have to pay about 10 times the normal tuition. I feel so stuck. I have been doing office work for several years now and the work I did before was low-paying and worse than what I'm doing now. Sorry I'm rambling about my job. I just don't know what's wrong with me. Sometimes I'll just be out shopping or something and it's like BAM! I'm suddenly unbelievably annoyed. And absolutely nothing will have triggered it. I do take a martial arts class 5 times a week, and it really reduces my stress, calms me down, etc., but unfortunately, 4 out of the 5 days, the class is in the evening, and by the next morning when I go to work again, of course the effect has worn off. Before anyone asks, nothing traumatic happened in my childhood, it was in fact very uneventful. My mother suffers from depression, as does my older sister. I know it's genetic, but I just don't feel like that's what it is. I don't have trouble getting up in the morning. I don't feel sad or worthless. I haven't lost interest in life, and I certainly haven't thought about suicide or death. I have taken those "Are You Depressed?" screenings a million times, but the descriptions never fit me. I've also done the anxiety ones, but I don't have the symptoms of that either. The racing heartbeat, the sweating, the feeling of dread or that you are going to die, the constant worry. None of it. I just get very tense and irritable, and out of nowhere. I will be perfectly fine all morning usually, and then for some reason, it hits me in the mid to late afternoon. And like I said, nothing really triggers it. It just happens all of a sudden. Something else that has been happening is, I lose my train of thought really easily. My boss will be explaining something to me, and I'm listening, but then when she's done talking, I can't remember anything she's said. And it's nothing complicated, even something like asking me to mail one piece of mail to one of our offices, and the other piece of mail to another one of our offices and then I'll say okay, but as she's walking away, I'll have to stop her and have her tell me again. Have to write alot of very simple things down so I'll remember sometimes. I just feel really spacey sometimes, can't think straight. Sorry I've gone on and on and written such a long post. If anybody has any ideas/advice for me, I would greatly appreciate it. :-)


Edited 4/3/2003 8:05:14 PM ET by kravinqueen976
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Fri, 04-04-2003 - 1:13pm
Hello,

I know exactly what you mean. It sounds like you have a few things going on in your life. I am pretty much the same age as you, and found myself in almost the same situation. Your not quite as happy as you would like to be, and other things are stressing you out. Or shall I say, you are letting things stress you out and get to you. I cover the phones sometimes at my work, and I feel the same way. I laughed when you made the comment about wanting to throw the phone out the window.

Unlike you, I do have anxiety and panic sometimes. But, my doctor put me on Zoloft 25mg (lowest dose) and I haven't had any bad PMS! It's been almost a whole month, and I haven't wanted to strangle someone and my gosh it's really helped. You may want to consider something like this.

Good luck,

Amanda

Amanda

When someone tells you that you can't go any farther, just tell them to look behind you and see how far you've

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Sat, 04-05-2003 - 3:18pm
Do you think its possible you could have PMS? The symptoms sure sound like it. When I have it, I suddenly get so irritable that I feel like blowing up. And this just happens out of the blue. Especially in grocery stores - I can't stand having people come up behind me with their shopping carts, or getting anywhere near me. And repitious noises like phones ringing, etc. drive me nuts. Part of my problem is the anxiety, and I realize that, but I'm convinced that part of it is also PMS, since it does happen most often at that time of the month. Just a thought. . .Maybe your doctor will have some ideas on treating it.

Randi

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-03-2003
Sat, 04-05-2003 - 7:28pm
Is it possible to have PMS all month long? LOL