New at this

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-26-2004
New at this
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Sun, 12-26-2004 - 3:02pm

Hi,

My name is Cheryl and this is my first time writing in. I'm 40 years old and though anxiety/depression problems run in my family, I've never had any serious problems with either, except for being a worry wart. A few months ago I had major surgery on my neck. I never told anyone, but I was scarred to death that I was going to die during the surgery. After the surgery I thought I would feel relief that I made it and all was OK, but it seems like my life has gone down hill since then. I would worry over ever little ache thinking the surgery wasn't successful, I got insomnia, crying a lot, digestive problems, and sinus headaches. I started taking Zoloft (50mg) but it was like the Zoloft made everything 10 times worse. I started having SEVERE insomnia, nervousness, panic attacks, I thought I was going insane. After only 2-3 weeks on the Zoloft I quit taking it. Though skeptical at first, I started seeing an acupuncturist/herbalist. I also started walking everyday and eating better. In just a few short weeks my insomnia was gone and I only had very mild anxiety. Like a fool, once I started feeling better I quit walking everyday and wasn't taking my herbs on a regular basis. Now the anxiety and nervousness is back, but I also feel some depression too. I have insomnia again, nervous stomach, and I feel foggy headed or like I can't concentrate sometimes (it's hard to explain). Recently I started having "ringing in my ears", and I don't know if that's from the anxiety or not? I've heard of people with depression not wanting to leave home or be around other people, but it's like I have the OPPOSITE problem. I'm fearful of being alone. I have no children, and I'm currently not working due to recovering from surgery. When my husband leaves to go to work in the morning I get really nervous and depressed. I MUST leave my house and try to stay gone until the afternoon when I know my husband will be home soon. I haven't been professionally diagnosed and I don't know if my problems stems more from anxiety or depression, or both. I'm just so confused!! Has anyone out there had similar problems/situation?

Some feedback would be soooo great!!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
In reply to: cgworrywart
Sun, 12-26-2004 - 4:14pm

Cheryl,

i have been on paxil for 4 years with great results.

i started with zoloft and it gave me incredible insomnia
and a bad stomach, needless to say i didn't take it long.

even though they are the same family of drugs, SSRI's.
they will work differently on different people, maybe you should
try another med...who prescribed it?

are you sharing with the people in your family
that deal with this, they can probably give you some
good insight and comfort.

i have heard anxiety problems arising during a major
life event...eg surgery.

i also want to run out of house and see people.

and from what i read it seems like your
anxiety came first.

hope this helps,
kris

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-02-2004
In reply to: cgworrywart
Sun, 12-26-2004 - 4:27pm

H Cheryl. I am 29 and have recently been diagnosed with anxiety disorder. I have always been a major worrier, ever since I was little. I was always afraid of getting a disease like cancer or dying. I had periods in life when it did not seem so bad but others when it was. I also have always had OCD, again though, it came and went. I have had little bouts of depression here and there through life but never anything major. I am married and do not have kids. I recently had what I now know was an anxiety attack when my husband and I were on vacation and hiked up a mountain and were staying all night in a cabin. Up to that night, I was feeling fine mentally. Ever since then though, I started having depression and fear and worries that have totally consumed me for almost 3 months now. I was very depressed at first for weeks, fearing another attack and scared that I had some awful disease or illness. Then I saw several docs and had many tests done to rule out everything you can think of and the doc said I had generalized anxiety disorder. She said some people just have isolated attacks here and there through life and the next day they are ok. But, she said sometimes we have an attack and our mind never really lets go of it and it becomes "generalized" and you are always feeling uneasy fearing the next attack and depression usually sets in and it is just a terrible cycle. She put me on Zoloft. I was on 25mg for 1 week and saw a minor improvement but not much. Then I was on 50mg for 2 weeks and started to improve more. Then I was on 100mg for 4 weeks and was doing great - almost totally back to normal. Unfortunately, last week I had a major attack. For several days before it I was feeling little feelings of uneasiness again, almost like it was warning me it was coming. Then it hit me like a ton of bricks. Now for the last few days I have been depressed as can be and scared. I am still on the Zoloft though.

I have days when I worry myself sick over every pain I have, assuming the worst. I hate that. It really makes me feel terrible. I also have days when I feel just uneasy, like I am never going to just be my old self again. That is the pits too.

I went to therapy and still go every other week. That has helped some.

Unfortunately, Zoloft can make you feel weird at first I hear and I can attest to that. It takes 4-6 weeks to really work. You might have to stick it out but talk to your doc and maybe they can try another med. Or maybe try therapy. I hear both med and therapy is the best though. Especially if you have tried fighting this on your own and still feel bad. I did that for 6 weeks or so and could not take it anymore.

This is a rough road, and I struggle with it a lot. I am really discouraged right now but I keep telling myself that it will get better. It did before and it has to again.

You are not alone though, and please come here and post anytime. I try to get on here everyday. It really helps me to know I am not alone.

Oh and I know what you mean about not wanting to be alone. If my husband is gone, I go drive around or go to a store to kill time until he comes home. I have only been able to spend one evening alone successfully in the last 3 months. Being around people helps me too so I know what you mean. It must keep our minds occupied or something. Today has been rough. We got 22 inches of snow this past week and it is very cold out and we have just been home all day and my mind is a mess. I am trying to do stuff like play card games with my husband and stuff like that to keep my mind on something. It is real tough though.

Kim

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-11-2004
In reply to: cgworrywart
Sun, 12-26-2004 - 5:35pm

Hi,Cheryl & welcome to the board! It's a pleasure to have you here. I can relate to your fear of surgery. I put off having my gallbladder removed for 3 years because I didn't think I would awaken from the anesthesia. As for surgery causing a bout of anxiety, that can happen. Any severe illness, trauma, accident, surgery & even the birth of a child(usually after the second child ? go figure) can be a trigger. Share your fears with your doctor. Get a confirmed diagnosis. Find out what is causing the ringing in your ears.

 

 


 



iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
In reply to: cgworrywart
Mon, 12-27-2004 - 7:06am
HI,
I'm wondering if you have post traumatic stress disorder - if this all started after major surgery.
I think you should go to your dr and talk to him about this. Is he/she the one that diagnosed the Zoloft?
Also - if the walking and the herbs were working for you - then DEFINITELY go back to them. I would make an urgent apt with the herbalist.
Good Luck
Love Sarah
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
In reply to: cgworrywart
Mon, 12-27-2004 - 11:28pm
Welcome to our community!

Blessings, Suz   Posts in this Community   

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-26-2004
In reply to: cgworrywart
Tue, 12-28-2004 - 5:33pm

Hi Kim,

Sorry for the late response. I really appreciate you e-mailing me back. Even though I'm sorry you're going through this anxiety/depression mess too, it helps to know I'm not alone and there are people out there who understand what I'm going through. Hang in there. If you haven't already, you will get through this. I'm not a real religous person, and I don't know what your beliefs are but I do believe in God & Jesus. I went to Christmas Eve service and though my anxiety didn't go completely away, I felt much better. I went to Church again the following Sunday night and after a few minutes of being there I felt this calm come over me. I slept like a baby that night and on Monday I had only very mild anxiety and no feelings of being scarred or depressed. I could have easily stayed home by myslelf that day, though I didn't because I took my nephew to the movies. The insomnia came back last night and I did feel a little anxious this morning, but once I got up and got busy I was feeling fine again. I'm home today by myself with no problems (no depression or scarred feelings). I'm not saying everything is perfect now and I'm not trying to push my beliefs on to you, but I really think my praying and reaching out to God has helped. I also know that exercising everyday for at least 30 minutes helps me too.

Take care,

Cheryl

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-26-2004
In reply to: cgworrywart
Tue, 12-28-2004 - 5:36pm

Hi Jan,

Thank you for your good advice and words of comfort. It means a lot.

Happy Holidays!!

Cheryl

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-26-2004
In reply to: cgworrywart
Tue, 12-28-2004 - 5:40pm

Hi Sarah,

I was wondering the same thing about having PTS. I will talk to my doctor. I had run out of my herbs and then they were back-ordered, but I get them today. Yeah!! Thanks for the advice and words of comfort.

Happy Holidays!!

Cheryl

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-26-2004
In reply to: cgworrywart
Tue, 12-28-2004 - 5:41pm

Suz,

Thank you!!

Cheryl

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-02-2004
In reply to: cgworrywart
Wed, 12-29-2004 - 10:34am

Hi Cheryl. You are welcome. Glad to share. It sure does help when you know you are not alone, I agree. Would you mind sharing what type of herbs you found helpful?
I have been exercising everyday for 30 mins and that is helpful.

I am not dedicated to any specific religion, but I do believe in God. I pray a lot and find some comfort in that at times. I have went to church some of the time and gotten that feeling of calmness that you described some of the times. My faith is something I know I need to dive into deeper and make it more solid just to help myself to understand some things better. I have thought of that many times. Glad you have found some peace with it. I hope to as well.

Kim

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