My First Real Anxiety Attack.. HELP!

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-02-2003
My First Real Anxiety Attack.. HELP!
6
Sun, 03-13-2005 - 5:36pm

Hi ladies,

I need some help. I had my first real anxiety attack today. We are going to Flordia in 2 1/2 weeks and I'm freaking out. I scared of the plane, I'm scared of being suck in Flordia and not being able to come home. I'm afraid to get back on a plane to come back home. My husband doesn't understand. My mother is a help. She wants me to try. She has been agoraphobic all of my life. I don't want to be her. I had a similar reaction once before but I thought it was because we left my dd at home to attend a funeral in another state. I thought I was upset because I couldn't get to my dd. Now, I think that there is something else going on. My mom has giving me some xanax and will give me more for the trip. But is there anything else that you could suggest. She told me to stop eating sugar immediatly! But what about vitamins? Please anything would help. I don't want to not go but the fear is so overwhelming I don't know how I could.

Thanks,
Lisa

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-11-2004
Sun, 03-13-2005 - 5:58pm

Welcome to our community, Lisa. You are not alone. Many of us have travelling related anxieties & I know first hand the fear of flying. You have some time before the trip to work on this. Firstly, you should see your family dr. ASAP. Xanax is a good drug for anxiety, but it might not be for you. Besides, it's against the law to use meds prescribed for someone else. When you call for the appointment, be honest & say that you have anxiety you cannot handle. You don't have time for long term therapy, but your dr. will give you some suggestions & clear you medically, which will bring alot of relief.


Practice breathing & relaxation exercises. Eat a well balanced diet. Cutting down on sugar never hurt anyone, but that rarely gives immediate results. It might cause more anxiety. There are some vitamins, particularly the B family or multivites for stress(check with your pharmacist) that may help. They are not miracle drugs. Exercise & get plenty of sleep.


To get on that plane, you must be determined to do some work. Take a deep breath. Write a list of all the positive reasons for the trip. Think positively. Focus on what is realistic. You are safer in the air, than in a car. You will more than likely NOT be stuck in Florida. Even if your flight home was cancelled, you would get another flight or a bus or a train or even rent a car. Back up all your plans in your mind. There are many things to keep your mind occupied when travelling. Whatever relaxes you @ home, use these methods. Don't go on this trip because someone else *wants* you too. Do it for you, Lisa. Others will post what has worked for them. Good luck! Sending P&PT's your way. (((hugs))) jan



 

 


 



iVillage Member
Registered: 04-07-2003
Sun, 03-13-2005 - 11:03pm
Hi and welcome!
Jan gave you many good suggestions as usual!! =0)
Be as positive as you can! Build yourself up from inside
to the outside. You can do this and when you do you will
realize that you don't want to miss out because of fear!
See your regular MD is a must! Many people are afraid of
flying!! It is a safe way to travel- statistics have shwon
that- being scared and anxious will not harm you it will
make you feel uncomfortable but you can control it!!
I live in Florida and I will tell you IT IS WORTH THE TRIP!!
Good luck and keep us posted as to how you are doing-
Take care, Judy
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-21-2003
Mon, 03-14-2005 - 5:25pm

Hi Lisa,

I am new to this board, as my only anxiety/panic issue is flying, so I don't encounter it often, and I'm not on any medication. Ok, that's not true about my only issue; tall buildings and the elevators within freak me out. I used to be nervous about flying and elevators (heights, really), but I had a bad plane experience in November of 2001 that made me avoid flying at all costs. It happened during takeoff, and the rest of the flight was uneventful, but I spent the entire flight close to tears. I later flew from Michigan to New Hampshire to visit my sister, about an hour flight, which was very bumpy, and had a giant panic attack when I went to fly back to Michigan. I was hysterically crying in the airport and rented a car. Of course I cried even harder then b/c I gave into my fear. It took me 18 hours straight to drive back home in a snowstorm. Not a smart thing in retrospect, but I was really scared, and I still understand it.

I have not flown since I flew out to NH that one time. That was in December 2001. I drive everywhere, even long distance. I like long distance driving, but still. And my boyfriend's dad flew in the Air Force for 20 years and for Delta for 12 years, so my bf is all into flying everywhere and doesn't really understand. My father is a physician, so he said he will prescribe me some Xanax when I have to fly, but I told him I wish I could just be put out, as in completely asleep as if I were having surgery, for the flight.

Anyway, my sister decided to have her wedding in Mexico this August. She asked me first if I would go, and I told her it was her wedding and her decision. When she solidified the week we'd be there, I nearly broke down in tears out of fear. Now I just think about having Xanax and being sleepy and out of it, and it isn't so bad. My fear is not actually a problem with the plane but my anxiety itself; it used to be control. I do worry, though, that I will worry the whole week I'm there about the flight back.

So think about it: is your fear the plane itself, control, or the fear and anxiety you feel? I feel better when I think that the fear is my fear and not the flying. Plus I really want to go to Mexico and go to my sister's wedding. My bf is flying with me, which helps, since I would be much worse on my own, but I am pretty much relying on medication to get me through. I'm going to "experiment" with it a week beforehand on a weekend to see the effects it has on me, but I really hope that's what it's about.

But I want you to know that many, many people share your fear and understand COMPLETELY how scared you feel. I know it myself, and I'm not telling you not to be scared. When people tell me "there's nothing to be afraid of" or "it's safer than driving," I want to tell them where to shove their advice. No one understands! But there are people who do. When I was on that bad flight and the one last flight afterwards, I found that imagining myself NOT on the plane helped. I was just imagining I am in the back of a car, and the noise and movement is from the car, and I felt fine. Then I opened my eyes and freaked out again.

I really hope you find something that helps you relax. I totally understand that just the thought is terrifying. Don't you wish you could be "beamed" somewhere like in Star Trek? Can't planes fly at a few hundred feet? Can't I just be put out completely during the flight? I just want to wake up and be there! I actually envy people in earlier times where train travel was the luxurious way to go! But unfortunately that's not the society we live in, and people like us are forced to suck it up and fly. You know in the back of your mind that the flight will be fine, but your own anxiety comes up with worst-case scenarios that will never happen (you're more likely to win the lottery). Just tell the flight attendants your problem and hopefully they can help you out, as well as whatever you can take to help you.

Also, my sister had a fear of flying (which caused panic attacks in other areas of her life that are now under control) and has more or less overcome it-- she is still a little nervous about it but will fly anywhere now. She found that doing internet research and educating herself about flying helped her overcome her fear. I tried it, which didn't help much since I know my fear is not really flying but my fear of it. (The only thing I have to fear is fear itself...)

Sorry to ramble; just kind of stream-of-consciousness writing. And I do apologize for lurking, as this is actually the first time I've visited this board. I hope just knowing someone completely understands how you feel helps you. Reading your message helped me chill out a little since everyone dismisses my fear. But try explaining your fear to your husband. He doesn't have to give you a solution or even say anything, but when I explained to my bf exactly what I am afraid of, at least it gave him something to try to understand and be sensitive to, and I felt better not trying to hide it.

Good luck, and have a nice trip. Try to envision the good time you'll have there.

Becca




Edited 3/14/2005 6:30 pm ET ET by beccalinda

Becca

On the Beach Since September 8, 2008

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-02-2003
Mon, 03-14-2005 - 8:56pm

Thank you everyone for your kind words. To answer Becca's question is yes, I'm afraid of the fear on the acutal plane. If I could fly the plane I would be fine. It's the control or lose of it. I'm also afraid to freak out and be stuck.

I did take your advice and saw my MD today. He gave me to things. The first is Lexapro. This is for the long term (I been needing something for a couple of years for depression and irritably) and Xanax for the anxiety before the flight and during my trip. He was so nice. He asked me some questions (Can I drive on the freeway, Go up North by car) and this was his plan.

I'm not sure about this trip. I hate to not got but I'm not sure I will be able to. I hope that the Lexapro will work. I have 2 weeks. I figure I have until the day before to decide. I'm going to try somethings to relax and wish for the best.

Lisa

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-21-2003
Mon, 03-14-2005 - 9:50pm

It will be nice when summer comes, and Up North is bearable (and beautiful)!

Best wishes from Ann Arbor... I really do know how you feel. Let us know how the medication works.

Becca

On the Beach Since September 8, 2008

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-07-2003
Mon, 03-14-2005 - 9:52pm
Lisa Sounds good to me! You went to your doctor who understood and helped you out!
It is great that you faced your fear instead of making excuses not to go!
That is something I often did when much younger-
The xanax will help you- hard to believe but it very relaxing!
Good idea to try it first and any relaxation you do will help you also!
Good Luck and let us know how it goes! Take care, Judy