Anyone?

Avatar for ariesgirl26
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Anyone?
4
Wed, 05-25-2005 - 12:39pm

I have a question, I believe I have a rare phobia, this phobia is so rare i believe that many people think I am just too starnge, what is the word for fear of shopping, or i should fear of spending money? It's very real, for an example, 3 weeks ago, my husband was heading to Israel for 14 days to visit a friend of his, so he waned to buy some clothes for his trip. he got a GAP credit card, because he didn't want to spend any money out of our checking account. So we go to pay for it, and I start freaking out when I see how much each item is. I was like OMG!!! HOw can a shirt be this expensive?! and I was freaking out I almost had a panic attack. My husband was so emabrrassed, because people were staring at me like I was some lunatic, i had to stand somewhere else. This is why when he buys me clothes, i have never bought clothes for myself, or alone, because I get upset at the fact of spending money, that he doesn't tell me how much the clothes actually cost.

i am constantly asking him how much we have in our account and if it's okay to go spend and buy something for myself. Not only do I have social anxiety disoreder, now I have the fear of spending money and I'm a woman. So if I want a shirt or a pair of jeans for myself, sometimes i will not buy them because of the fact they expensive to me, and this is at Old Navy, or Gap or even discount stores. i usually have to have someone come with me and sometimes i even call my husband so he can ssure me it's okay to buy that item. I am getting worse, I deliberatly don;'t get my hair cut until my husband says please go cut your hair, I only buy for the kids, and I assure myself it's necessary, they need the clothes or shoes. Sometimes if i want to get take out, i call my husband up and say how much do we have in our account? He says enough, he is not aloud to tell me the number because I become emtional if I think it's too low, I'm very strange!! SORRY. Then he gives me the okay to order take out. I have lost friends because they don't understand the situation and think my husband is controling, they won't me explain I have a fear of spending money!

paying bills, is something I have to do or my husband will forget to pay them. By the time I am done, i am literay shaking to death, sweating profusely, and I have to take a breather!

Is anyopne like me at all? or am I really this ordinary. I have never met anyone like this, and like I said my ex firends didn't take it lightly at all.

Please anyone?!?!?!!?!?!?

Jessica

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-17-2001
In reply to: ariesgirl26
Wed, 05-25-2005 - 1:45pm

Hi Jessica,
I'm sorry that I can't say that I know what you are going through.
I have anxiety and panic issues.

I am not a medical Dr but I do suggest that you make and appt. with your physician. Phobias are REAL and they can affect your life in a major way.

Their is effective treatment available and that may be what you need at this point. That could include therapy and or medication.

I did look up phobia on webmd and I will post the link.
It seems as though what you are going through is considered normal behavior with someone with a phobia.

Check out this link and I suggest that you call your physician. Their is no need for you to suffer with this.

P&PT and let me know if I can help in any way...
((HUGS))
Heather

http://my.webmd.com/content/Article/49/39670.htm?pagenumber=1

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-12-2003
In reply to: ariesgirl26
Wed, 05-25-2005 - 2:32pm

Hi Jessica,
many people with anxiety disorders experience phobias. Although yours may be rare, it is by no means strange. Perhaps money is a trigger for you for some reason, which is understandable. Finances can be an extremely stressful thing for people.
I agree with Heather that you should meet with your doctor, or perhaps a therapist in order to work on facing your fears.
I hope things get better for you, and keep us updated :)

Mia

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-11-2004
In reply to: ariesgirl26
Wed, 05-25-2005 - 2:38pm

Hi, Jessica & welcome! You are not alone. Others have posted about fears/phobias that may not be the common ones we hear about. Below is a website you can go to & see if your phobia has a name. Maybe knowing that will relieve your anxiety a bit. For now, we can offer you support as we have all sorts of uncontrolled fears. There is help. There is hope. There are meds that can help

 

 


 



iVillage Member
Registered: 10-02-2004
In reply to: ariesgirl26
Thu, 05-26-2005 - 12:42pm

You know, there is a disorder that people have where they spend like crazy and are shopaholics, so why wouldn't there be people out there like you that are just on the opposite end of the spectrum? Don't worry that you are alone. We all have phobias and issues that we think are odd. I have a terrible fear of cancer. It crosses my mind all the time. I have no idea why. I have never had it, no one close to me has either, but I have a terrible fear of it. I get myself very sick just thinking about it when I really get worried. Many people that I tell that to ask me why. I cannot explain it. I just have that fear. They tell me there are many worse things to fear but I cannot seem to let go of it. I know there are worse things. But that does not help.

Kim