Why are mornings so very hard?
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| Wed, 06-22-2005 - 10:30am |
First, thanks everybody for your encouraging words - I need them right now.
I'm sure many of you experience the same thing, but why are mornings so hard? I can't seem to kick the feeling I get when I wake up - my heart is beating so fast, I start to sweat, and I imagine that the entire day is going to be like that. It feels like I'm doomed from the beginning. I can't seem to get rid of the general feeling of anxiety that wakes me up.
I'm really concerned that this anxiety is going to start to affect my relationship with my boyfriend. I used to feel safe and secure around him - now, I seem to relate him to feeling anxious too. I think, looking back a couple of weeks ago, I started to feel the way I do now - just very anxious in general - and it kept going even when he and I were together ... Now, I seem to be looking back on those times and the feelings of anxiety don't go away when we hang out ... I can't tell what is the truth and what the anxiety is telling me ... I hope with all of my heart that my feelings haven't changed towards him ... I love him so much and don't want this to come between us.
Please help.

Hi there,
I am so sorry to hear that you are having such a tough time.
I am not totally familiar with your story. Are you newly diagnosed, have you recently started new meds?
I am newly diagnosed, just 8 weeks ago.
In the beginning I woke up every day and I was shaky right away. It was so awful, I was afraid to go to bed because I was afraid of waking up like that. Evenually it went away and I don't wake up that way anymore all the time, some days I do but its not as bad.
All I can really suggest is that as soon as you wake up you start your belly breathing and positive
Thank you so much. Sometimes, I think it helps knowing that other people feel the exact same way as me ... that I'm not really as alone as I think.
I guess I've been "diagnosed" with anxiety for years now ... it goes through waves - good times and bad times - and I guess this seems to be one of the bad times. There is a lot going on in my life, and I don't react well at all to changes of any sort.
My boyfriend and I are both going through some major changes and stressful times right now. He just graduated from college (I'm older than him) and went through the whole medical school application process. He hasn't yet been accepted and is on the waiting list at one school - he has no idea when he will hear from them so it is hard for us to plan for the fall. I have applied to law school and have been accepted - I'm waiting to decide where I'm going to go based on what happens with my BF ... we want to be together. I've never moved far from home before - for the past 7 years or so I've lived about an hour away from my family and that scares me to death. All of these uncertain times have caused stress in our relationship. Even though these things aren't in the forefront of my mind on most days, I think it is the underlying fact that they exist that is really causing my anxiety to peak right now. I think, and am hoping, that this could explain why I am associating spending time with my BF with anxiety and stress ... We have been together almost exactly a year ... The infatuation period has passedd and I think we've settled into more comfortable times where other things in life have caught up with us. I can't imagine that my feelings for him have changed. The fact that I am not able to express them so passionately is what's bothering me. Somewhere the idea got planted in my anxious mind that since i'm not constantly looking at him each day thinking "god, i love this guy" that my feelings have changed ... I don't have the same sex drive, which would seem to make sense since my mind is filled with so many other stressful thoughts and this makes me worry that I don't feel the same about him, too. Then the anxiety kicks in and runs away with those negative thoughts, creating a massive story in my head ... I hope this makes sense to somebody out here ... Any advice or thoughts on this would be so appreciated. I am thankful that I found this message board and community ... I want more than anything to be okay and to love my BF in every way possible.
((((Hopelessly)))