I think I'm feeling better ... but

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-28-2005
I think I'm feeling better ... but
Wed, 06-29-2005 - 11:00am

Well, like I said yesterday, I'm taking a lot of steps to try to help myself and I think some of them, along with the support of the board, are helping me. I feel more like myself today.

The thoughts about my boyfriend and relationship are slowing down - they are by no means gone, but I feel more controlled and that I understand them more. I haven't been waking up as anxious and had a good meeting with my counselor this morning. I'm pretty much convinced that I'm just going through a bad time and my negative thoughts about my BF are as a result of the anxiety - but, at the same time, I'm allowing this to happen - I have to keep my mind in control and stop myself - stay busy, focus on more positive things, exercise, etc.

Me, my BF, and his family are going to Connecticut this weekend for the 4th of July. I'm a little worried about this. Worried about getting anxious while I'm away and feeling stuck. I feel like there will be nobody there that could help me if I get upset and that will understand the anxiety. I know I will have my boyfriend there with me and that he will at least try to help me if I need him. I'm trying not to feel as anxious around him and to understand that those associations are untrue and meaningless. I was looking forward to the weekend and hope that I can do so again. I just want to be okay and have fun. I'll be a little depressed when we come home, as I always am after a vacation, but I know that that too will pass and everything will be okay.

Has anybody felt the same way?