Can't calm down...

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-28-2005
Can't calm down...
6
Wed, 07-13-2005 - 11:26am

Hi ... Hope everybody is doing well ... I haven't been around in a couple of days ... I didn't have computer access over the weekend and have been trying to focus more on my work while I'm at work ... instead of the anxiety.

Last week, I thought I was doing so much better ... everything was looking up ...

But I'm back to where I was before ... My heart is beating out of my chest right now. I feel so uncomfortable and lonely. I'm not very busy this week and it is driving me crazy. I'm scared to be alone and to have to much time to dwell on the anxiety. This probably sounds weird - for most being busy probably causes more anxiety - but for me it is the total opposite. I get so anxious when I have nothing to do. And I'm still directing all of my anxiety, frustration, and anger on my boyfriend - which is so unfair to do.

All I want to do is go home to my parents house - which is an hour away from where I live. I feel like that is running away, though. But I dread sitting home alone in my apartment tonight with the anxiety.

Help! I hate when I get these little attacks at work ...

Avatar for atober
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2004
Wed, 07-13-2005 - 1:07pm

I am the same way. If I have work to do the day goes fast and I usually don't even think about the anxiety. Mine is the worst when I have nothing to do, which has been a lot lately for me, unfortunately. I have left my last couple of jobs over this issue and was very clear that I needed a "challenge". I was assured that I would be busy and challenged and am frustrated finding out that that is not the case now.

Anyway, I have to stick it out, but my anxiety at work is like yours, never worse than when I don't have anything to do.

Hope you can find something else to concentrate on. I usually spend most of my day on the boards here, sometimes posting, sometimes just reading.

Alison

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-18-2003
Wed, 07-13-2005 - 4:09pm

I'm the same way. I have to keep my mind busy all the time to avoid the anxiety. Even if I'm just reading a good book it helps. I don't think going to your parents house would be running away. I used to find comfort there, I think you should ask your boyfriend to go with you and maybe it will help you both. If he resists, go yourself & see if you feel better. If you keep taking your frustrations out on him, it will hurt your relationship and you may not be able to fix that. Your anxiety can be helped. You need to be in a place where you feel safe & can rest. I hope you feel better soon :)

Hugs,
Sheri Ann

Sheri Ann

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-31-2005
Wed, 07-13-2005 - 7:43pm
hi my name is ana and im sorry u are feeling this way. we all do at times so more then others. RElax i know thats hard to do. especially with our panics.. i get over whelmed about many many things, im just like u i have to keep myself busy so i dont start thinking bad thoughs and that i have kind of diseases and worry myself sick. Try to read a book watch a movie go hang out with your friends. my boyfriend usually stays with me at all times besides when hes at work and hes been getting off 3-4 hrs earlier to be with me which helps. i dont like being alone eithers its lonly feeling and gives your self time to worry even more,sometimes when i get scared i take a sleeping pill and go to bed. i feel much better in the morning. maybe u could join a community group or something take a evening night class or something that gets u around people and keeps your mind busy. i live with my parents but am at my b/f house 99.9% of the time.. so like when i feel lonly or down or im worried sick i run home to my mom which is about an hour away. and the drive helps me cool down too. maybe you should make it a routin to go down/up there when u feel that way and theres not one around because and can be very fraustrating. i hope u get better. best wishes and luck,... ANA have any ?'s i will try to answer them the best i can.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-11-2004
Wed, 07-13-2005 - 7:50pm
You have faced many fears head on, Maribeth & came out on top. From your posts, I can hear that you're doing much better. You should give yourself alot of the credit. You have worked hard to get where you're @. Try not to let the anxiety @ work get ahead of you. Put it behind you @ the day's end. As for wanting to go to your folk's, well we all have our safe places & safe ppl. There's no shame in that. I wish you well. Keep in touch. We care! (((hugs))) jan



 

 


 



iVillage Member
Registered: 05-12-2003
Wed, 07-13-2005 - 10:09pm

Im sorry to hear that you're having this set back, but you'll get through this, just like you've faced your anxiety in the past!
it's perfectly normal to feel more anxious when you're bored or not busy. In fact, my therapist always asks me to keep my self busy and set a schedule for my self. it's something about having things to look forward to and obligations to keep that gives us less time to think about our anxieties.
as for going to your parents' house, you should do whatever makes you feel comfortable, and you certainly shouldn't feel that's you're failing yourself in any way. My first instinct whenver i get bad anxiety is to go home, but my parents live very far away, so it's not feasible. I try to get through those times by calling my mom a lot and talking to her on the phone, or talking with my boyfriend, or just a friend that I trust. Where is your bf if you dont mind me asking? could he spend the house at your house?

Mia

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-28-2005
Thu, 07-14-2005 - 12:18pm

THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH! It means so much to me to have this board and so many people that understand anxiety. I hope that I can help all of you too...

Today is going much better...I think because I'm trying harder today to be happy...I kinda gave in to the anxiety the past couple of days...Still don't think I'm doing enough for myself though.

I had a great night at home last night (glad you guys understand why it is such a safe place to me and don't think there's anything wrong with that)...I was anxious when I woke up this morning but the Xanax did help me to calm down a little (at least my body)...I'm at work now and trying to stay busy and not to focus on the anxiety. I still struggle with trying to get rid of the need to feel an urgency to make my boyfriend understand what this is all about...I think that's why I feel anxious around him...I have to ignore the anxiety and not feel like I have to be talking to him about it all the time. I want to enjoy his company again and focus on his great qualties...not my problems all of the time.

Please let me know how you are all doing today...I hope everybody is having a peaceful day. Take care all!

With much thanks,
Maribeth