Help! I don't know what to do!

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-25-2004
Help! I don't know what to do!
4
Wed, 08-10-2005 - 11:54pm
I was seeing a psychologist for my OCD but I didn't feel comfortable with her so I stopped going. Now I regret it deeply because my anxiety is starting to ruin my life. I can't sleep at night and I wake up several times, my hands shake, my heart races, I have continuous headaches and nausea, and I feel constantly on edge. I feel completely helpless. I am terrified that something bad is going to happen. It has been building up slowly over the last few months but has reached a peak recently. In two weeks I start college for the first time and I am completely petrified. I now avoid all stores that sell stuff for dorm rooms and college life. I visited the college and almost had a panic attack in the showers because I thought someone was going to walk in on me, even though no one was there. I'm paranoid that someone is hiding in my room or standing over me with a knife, waiting for me to sleep so he can hurt me and I don't know how to stop it. I feel like I'm going crazy. I have always been jumpy but now even the slightest noise scares me terribly. My parents have no idea this is going on and even enjoy scaring me! I've developed a phobia of spiders and webs which is really bad because I have long blonde hair that startles me several times a day when I mistake it for a web. When I was seeing a psychotherapist, she suggested medication but I would have to see a psychiatrist which was almost impossible as she should have known because I'm also a social phobic. I'm thinking of seeing the doctor on campus and taking the medication anyway, but I'm scared at how I will react to it. Does anyone else have the same problems or know how I could deal with them? I feel like I'm all alone in this because no one else I know seems to understand. They think I'm either crazy or making it up.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Thu, 08-11-2005 - 12:08am

Hi adair!

Blessings, Suz   Posts in this Community   

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-11-2004
Thu, 08-11-2005 - 12:28am

Hi! It's nice to have you here. Others in our community suffer from fears similiar to what you have described. As Suz said, we can't diagnose you. That must be done by a medical professional. It's in your best interest to see a medical dr. to have any conditions ruled out that may be causing fear & anxiety issues. Once that is done, then get the help you need.


It will be such a relief to tell someone about how you're feeling. Don't hesitate to let

 

 


 



iVillage Member
Registered: 10-25-2004
Thu, 08-11-2005 - 11:16am
I was able to go to the therapist because I knew her outside of the office before I went. She was the mother of someone I knew so we had met before. I don't know any psychiatrists. Also, I have been keeping it from my parents because of how they reacted when I told them I thought I had OCD. They didn't believe me and only scheduled an appointment with the doctor to humor me. They are of the belief that people should solve their own problems and deal with the ones they can't solve. They said I just needed someone to talk to. That's why I don't know what to do. I already told my mom that the therapist didn't help my OCD, and if anything it got worse while I was seeing her. She is also staunchly against medication, although I'm 18 and don't need her permission to take them. That's why I don't know what to do. Sorry if I didn't clarify enough my situation.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-11-2004
Thu, 08-11-2005 - 11:54am
That's a bummer about your parents): One of the most difficult issues we must face is the lack of support. Coming here is good, but *real life* help is the best. Since you're 18, make an appointment with your family dr. If you can't do that, as soon as you get to school get to the student health center. See the dr. there & follow the treatment plan. They will get you in touch with a psychiatrist. If you feel you must do something, now, & only you would know that, call your local mental health center listed under government. Usually in the States it's under county. They operate on a sliding scale & since you probably won't be holding a full time job as a student, you