thought i was ok, please help

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-29-2003
thought i was ok, please help
14
Thu, 08-11-2005 - 7:46pm

Hi there,

Today has been such an emotional day for me. I was feeling great. Made sure all my ducks were in a row. No one was mad at me, I didn't say anything to hurt anyone's feelings, I felt "ok." Then BOOM, one thing happens that sends me in a talespin. I said something to a friend (Jen), and her reaction seemed like she was upset. We just found out our kids are in the same pre-school class, and it is a great class. The kids are wonderful. I was just a little sad that this one little girl, Sarah, wasn't in our class. I felt like I hurt my friend's feelings by telling her i was sad that Sarah wasn't in the class. Stupid... I know. This must sound so silly to a total stranger reading this. This girl (Jen) is not an overly sensitive person, and she probably didn't think twice about it. I just feel awful that maybe she thought I wasn't happy that our kids are together. I don't know what to do. I know I need to ride these things out, but I am going to be up all night worrying about this. I am also upset that Jen and Sarah's mom made plans without me. I feel so lonely and left out. I just feel like dissapearing. I don't feel like I have a soul in the world to talk to. No one wants to hear my BS anymore.

Thank you to anyone reading this. I could really use some positive words right now. I don't know how much longer I can take this anxiety. It comes and goes so quickly, and just a few small words can make all the difference. It is so sad that my life is based on people's tones and such. I am such a loser. It's amazing I have two small children.

JD

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-11-2004
Thu, 08-11-2005 - 8:26pm

I don't know if you'll consider this a positive thought or not. But, STOP IT! Noone is allowed to call themselves a loser on this board. Ppl with anxiety are a sensitive lot. You're calling all of us, losers. You need to accept yourself & your anxiety. You cannot change it, but you can learn to cope with it better & not allow it to rule your life.


You are a good person. You have worth. You matter to others. You are needed & loved by family & friends. Remind yourself of all these things when the unreasonable fears & negative thinking overcome you. Especially when you look @ those 2 children who depend totally on their mom. Good luck & God bless you! Can you make chat tonight, Jolie? Allow the others to pump you up a bit. (((hugs))) jan



 

 


 



iVillage Member
Registered: 05-13-2003
Thu, 08-11-2005 - 8:26pm


Sweetie,

You are not hopeless. You are just sensitive and tough on yourself!! I can so relate to you. I can be very sensitive and I get my feelings hurt quite often. Don't be so hard on yourself. Life ebbs and flows. Some days are bad but some days are good too! I hope you have a better day tomorrow!!!

S.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2004
Thu, 08-11-2005 - 8:53pm
Hi JD, Glad to hear from you. #1 You are NOT a loser, in any way, shape or form. You are just sensitive to other ppl's feelings. I do not feel you said or did anything wrong.
Sometimes I worry about something till I get myself so worked up, then come to find out, the other person hadn't a 2nd thought about what I was worrying about! So keep your chin up, and SMILE! :0) You are a wonderful person! We Care! Post anytime! hugs,shasta
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-27-2005
Thu, 08-11-2005 - 9:27pm
You are not a loser. You're reacting to something that may not have even happened--someone being mad at you. You're catastrophizing, and that's dangerous. Don't worry about the unknown, OK? You have plenty of worth. Just remember that.
Kendra
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-18-2003
Thu, 08-11-2005 - 11:16pm

I agree with Shasta 100%. Often time I get myself so worked up over someone not liking me or not being included in something & you know what? They're never mad & I wasn't left out on purpose, they just made plans and didn't even think about inviting anyone else. Maybe you could plan a playdate with the other 2 moms at your house or at the park. Give yourself a chance to get together with them. Don't be so hard on yourself. You seem like a very sensitive, kind & caring person:)

Sheri Ann

Sheri Ann

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-02-2004
Fri, 08-12-2005 - 9:12am

I know what you mean about feeling fine, then BAM, it hits. That really gets me down. I will be doing just fine and suddenly I get that horrible feeling. Sometimes I do not even know why. Sometimes it can be a memory of some other day or just something minor. Any way that it happens still makes you feel miserable. I know my husband is tired of hearing about it too. I even get sick of talking about it to him sometimes. I get so frustrated of not knowing when "it" is going to attack. I feel your pain, trust me.

Kim

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-29-2003
Fri, 08-12-2005 - 9:53am
I know I am just panicking. I made it worse by trying to smooth it over, and now I think she thinks I am annoying and "stalkerish." Have you ever had these feelings? By reading your email it sounds like you haven't. I feel like I am coming out of my skin, and i wish I could borrow some of your strength. UGG.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-29-2003
Fri, 08-12-2005 - 9:56am
I am still panicking over this. I made it worse by trying to smooth it over. I am overthinking everything, and my stomach is in knots. I can't enjoy anything because I am so worried about these two moms. I do feel like a complete loser and failure that I can't control my emotions enough to be normal. I just want to crawl out of my skin. HELP ME!
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-17-2001
Fri, 08-12-2005 - 10:38am

You are NOT a loser. Believe me!


I understand about the anxiety coming out of nowhere. I think that we all get that.


As far as your friends go...


Last friday a friend from church had a Pampered Chef party and their were 2 of us that said we were going. Well I was the only one that showed up.


So Sunday at church I asked the other girl where she had been, i was worried about her. She has anxiety and thought maybe that was acting up.


So, she said where she was and we all ended up going about coffee hour afthe church. SHe ended up flipping

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-29-2003
Fri, 08-12-2005 - 2:12pm
Thanks sweetie. I don't mean to call anyone else a loser. I look at everyone on this board as strong and tough. I just can't do it myself.

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