waiting for the other shoe
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| Sat, 08-20-2005 - 2:11pm |
HI everyone,
I thought I could post while my anxiety was not at an all time high. My only problem is that I feel like I am waiting for the other shoe to fall. The anxiety is always there, it is just laying a bit dormant right now. I still feel the knot in my stomach, and I am waiting to explode. My son has two more weeks off of school, and I feel like no-one will call me for plans, and i am going to be the one who has to initiate. I don't mind doing it, if I didn't feel like I do it all the time. I feel like no one wants to be with us.
I am so lonely because I feel like I am by myself a lot. My husband has been trying to get a new business started and running for over a year now, and he is working 7 days a week. LITERALLY. I am with my kids, other than one day a week, and I feel like I am burning out. I hope someone calls us, at least I will feel wanted.
Thank you to anyone who is reading this.
Love and hugs, JD

Sorry to hear that you're still having thoughts of being excluded. The wait for the other shoe to drop is something many with anxiety can connect with. My gramma always called it *borrowing trouble.* Boy oh boy! Was I ever good @ that! LOL
I hope you get your call, but if not, Jolie, do NOT suffer. Step right up & make your own call. You deserve to be kinder on yourself. Many of us hold ourselves up to standards we'll never achieve. Go out & make your own fun. Give yourself a big hug from me. I think you need one. We care. We want to see you living a good life & it is possible. Good luck! jan
Jan, you are the sweetest person. I always want to take your messages and tape them to my bathroom mirror. This way, everyday I can get your inspiration. Your words are amazing, but they never sink into my brain. That is my problem. I can never hold on to the good advice, because my anxiety takes over. I am so scared to "make the first move." I know these girls well, and I am sure they are not thinking anything negative about me, however, my rumination tape keeps telling me different.
Thanks again for your kind words and comfort. I truly appreciate it! You are very special. Love and hugs, Jolie