been a little bit, sorry

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-16-2005
been a little bit, sorry
4
Thu, 12-22-2005 - 4:24pm

Just wanted to post a QUICK UPDATE ON US.............

Dh has been home from his over the road job since the 2nd of this month, he doesn't leave back out until around the 20th of next month (he's a travling boilermaker). It is very hard with him here, I love him, but he and our DD just don't mesh very well. They are like two siblings instead of father and daughter, most times.

I have been going tt a regular councilor, i really like her. I have never been this comfortable with one before. We really haven't started working on anything, just lettign me talk. I have yet to leave her office without crying. I told her that was one of my goals now! LOL

I have started DD with a councilor as well. We have only had the first (background) meeting so far, so I don't know how good it will be yet. DD really needs help with her anger problems, and her boundry issues(she has none!)

We are still dealing with my depression every day. DH is such an enabler, that it is a little hard for him. I haven't felt like doing anything the past few months, and when he got home he has had to take the roll of house cleaner, cook, and maid. I feel aweful that after working as hard as he does at his job, he comes home to this!!

He is a huge support for me, but because he loves me so much he also enables me to be this way. I really don't know what I would do if he stopped it, I DO know that I would be mad for a while, because he's always been this way.

I have been spending alot of time in bed, and not doing too much else. everything has suffered for it. I am on meds, and I take them everyday. I know I feel a LITTLE better, but I know I should be feeling more.

I haven't been able to keep up with everyone, so I hope all is doing well, and that the Holidays are going favorably for everyone.

<>,
Diana

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-16-2005
Thu, 12-22-2005 - 5:24pm

Diana so good to have an update on you and your family. Glad to hear you have found a therapist that you can talk to. Hopefully that will be a big help to you. And getting DD into therapy is a great idea. They may be able to come up with some ways to work comprimises between her and your husband. I know constant bickering can be very stressful for everyone involved. Perhaps you could work on accomplishing something small everyday until you can again take over the house work and cooking. Maybe set a day aside to clean one room or cook one meal. By pushing yourself to do something constructive you should start feeling better about yourself and work your way out of the depression. I know it usually works for me when I start feeling like I'm not contributing to the good of our family life. Good luck and just think in small steps and before you know it you'll be taking giant steps.

Keitha

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-11-2004
Thu, 12-22-2005 - 7:13pm

That was a great update, Diana. In spite of the fact that you're still depressed, you're doing all the right things & you recognize the problems & have some goals & plans in place to make things better.


I suffered a severe depression in the early 90's & what you described is almost textbook symptoms. I never left the couch. I didn't clean or cook or launder or take care of the kids the way I should have. Keitha has the right idea. I had to start doing my regular chores in the smallest steps possible. My concentration wasn't good & all that inactivity made me weak. I literally began cleaning out JUST a CORNER of a room each day. You CAN do it. You WILL do it when you're ready.


Please take care & keep well. Wishing you happy holidays too! Keep in touch. We care & want the best for you. (((hugs))) jan


 

 


 



iVillage Member
Registered: 03-22-2003
Thu, 12-22-2005 - 8:24pm

Diana, you sound really good in your post.

Sheri Ann

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-11-2004
Fri, 02-03-2006 - 9:43am
Hi, Diana! After your last update, you sort of dropped off the radar. I am hoping that you're doing well. Am keeping my fingers crossed. We care about you & you're always welcome, here. Good luck & GBU! Missing ya, friend. (((hugs))) jan