OMG! This is peculiar!
Find a Conversation
| Tue, 12-27-2005 - 7:37pm |
I was feel the anxiety all day long as I typically do lately. Well, we went and did some post X-mas shopping. I had this urge to go to the McDonald's nearby even though I'm not crazy about the food. (I was a manager there for quite sometime so I got sick of the food). Well, we went through drive-thru and I saw one of my old co-workers/friends there. He manages that restaurant now. (it's a different McD's from the one we worked at a couple years ago). Then I saw another one of the crew people that used to work at our store. It was so familiar to me. I talked to them for a few minutes and it was just wonderful! It made my day.
What's peculiar about it is that my anxiety went away completely. I remembered working with them and I miss my job sooooooooo much. I miss all of them soooooo much. I guess I'm still so attached to some things in my past before all these changes in my life took place. Sometimes I wish I could go back in time. Even though I was a single mom raising three kids and lived in a crappy apartment barely making ends meet, I felt good then. I miss feeling good.
DH suggested that once I'm well on the road to recovery that perhaps I should get a job there. My friend would hire me on the spot; that I know. The only problem is that this store is 35 minutes away from my house. Kind of a jaunt for not making so much money. But it at least gives me something positive to think about anyway! :)

I see that this experience fits in with what Sheri Ann suggested. Look for the positive in every experience. You felt comfortable around friends. You had the support you needed. You were able to focus on something other than the anxiety & when it no longer had power, you felt relief. Maybe this is the direction you need to take in your life. Everyone needs to find their comfort zone. Good luck! Glad to hear you're feeling better. (((hugs))) jan
I'm glad that you had that experience. I know what you mean about missing the days before living with anxiety (though I am 32 and have had panic attacks on and off since I was hit by a car when I was 17 so sometimes I have trouble remembering what it was like). The toughest thing for me about the panic disorder is how it has changed my life. There are things that I just can't do anymore. After I have a bad period I have to ease back into work and I absolutely hate losing any functionality. I am single and, although I am blessed with an amazing family and truly great friends, I am very much a career woman. I worked very hard to get where I am and am very proud of my position so it really hits me hard when I can't work.
You'll get there. While I still have the occasional attack, therapy and medication have made my life as close to normal as it will ever be and I am so thankful for that.
That is soooo great!
Sheri Ann
Yes, there is a comfort in my keeping the possibility of getting a job there in the back of my mind. I don't know that I'll actually do it or not, but just knowing that I could if I need to is of tremendous help to me. :)
I keep thinking about seeing him last night and it really was comforting. He was so cheerful and genuinely happy to see me! And the other crew person, well, she reminds me of her mother who was the store manager at my old restaraunt. She has her mother's eyes and I was such good friends with her mother. So seeing her reminded me of better times and it was just so amazing! :)
Jennifer
"Oh, that you would bless me indeed, and enlarge my territory, that Your hand would be with me, and that You would keep me from evi