Horrific night, I'm really scared
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| Wed, 01-18-2006 - 9:42am |
Hi all-
When I was younger (teen years) I would get sudden onsets of panic; this stopped several years ago. Recently, however, I have begun having a very different, more physical type of panic attack--or what we believe are panic attacks. There was one back in November, and several since I came to NYC on school break 4 weeks ago--at least 4 in the past week. I'll have either one or two "skips"--like a strong startle response by my heart--or my heart rate will speed up for no reason. Then nausea, lightheadedness, cold hands, and freaking out over the fact that my heart is racing for no reason. Sometimes there is a numbness/tingling feeling in my fingers, feet, and the back of my head.
The first attack was almost certainly due to a prolonged period of extreme stress, lack of sleep, and excess caffeine. Another that occurred in the middle of the night was almost certainly from too much alcohol.
The rest, though follow a rough pattern of being stuck in uncomfortable social situations--housebound with someone else's rambunctious children, or at a party or dinner with my DH's colleagues who I don't know and talk about things and I can't leave.
Last night was the worst. After dinner (two glasses of champagne included) I went to bed and could not sleep ALL NIGHT. My heart started racing whenever I moved, and I was absolutely terrified. At 5 am my DH wokeup and talked to me for a few minutes, which seemed to help, but this morning I am still not over it. My pulse seems ok, but my fingers and legs are tingling and I "feel" like my heart is racing even when it isn't. I should have slept more, but I was afraid to be home alone when I feel this way.
I am scared to death that:
a) there is something more serious and threatening going on being dismissed as anxiety
b) when I return home from break in two days, I will not be able to calm down without my DH there
c) I will not be able to handle the stress of my Cornell MBA and will have to leave school
d) I will not be able to handle the stress of having children, which has always been important to me
PLEASE...if anyone can say anything to help, I really need it right now. I'm trying really hard not to cry at my desk or run myself over to the ER. I've started obsessing over my heart rate, randomly checking it, which I'm sure is contributing to my ongoing anxiety state and tachycardia.
Edited 1/18/2006 9:58 am ET by lily_rose_fae

OK...so I'm talking to myself. I'm at work, can't talk to anyone else....
I know I am textbook for this. It is coexisting with hypoglycemia and ADD, and I had problems with depression as a teenager. Various family members on both sides have had problems with substance abuse, depression, and anxiety. Furthermore, I've always been the nervous type--they really shouldn't let people like me read about freak accidents or medical conditions.
I also know that these late night episodes appear to be directly correlated with too much alcohol, and possibly foods that destabilize my blood sugar. Aside from the first one, which had a whole slew of physiologicalal triggers and passed within 30 minutes, the rest have a pretty clear environmental pattern to them. Plus, this morning, I am having the other anxiety symptoms without the tachycardia.
I have research heart conditions online and know that my symptoms indicate, at worst, a mitral valve prolapse, and most likely just ideopathic tachycardia and palpitations.
BUT...nobody's looked at my heart yet. These never happen at a convenient time (ie- when I have acces to the health center), and when I'm not having an attack it is pretty clear to me that I have developed an anxiety disorder. But the lack of a cardiac exam keeping tugging at the back of my mind. DH is a radiologist and says that once his employment is full-time (he's a part-time fellow) he'll get me in for an unreferred MRI paid out of pocket to keep it off my insurance record, just for peace of mind. I know it's probably overkill, but it would be something tangible I can hopefully ground myself with to stop thinking that I'm going to die when this happens. I nearly woke him at 3 am to go to the ER, but I knew that it would not help and owuld just cost a fortune and sitting there would probably make me feel even worse.
I'm starting to feel a little better, I think. But this is all new to me...it's come on so quickly! I quit caffeine three weeks ago, and it looks like alcohol will have to go too.
Edited 1/18/2006 10:49 am ET by lily_rose_fae
Would you like to chat for a few minutes??
Sheri Ann
Hello & welcome to our caring community. I wish we could meet under better circumstances.
You are NOT alone. Many of us with anxiety have experienced these or similiar
I'm glad you found us :)
Sheri Ann
Those are the exact same symptoms I have. The heart racing everytime I move. The skip of my heart every once in awhile, just out of the blue. I had an EKG, my heart is fine. I am convinced it is anxiety. Just knowing that it is anxiety keeps me under control.
Hope this helps you...
Thank you, everyone.
The chat with Sheri Ann and Heather helped A LOT. It was very reassuring to hear that the scariest parts were actually "normal." I feel fine now, and am getting back into my work now.
I'll see a doctor when I get back to Ithaca. I've been on winter break in NYC, so my student insurance only covers emeregencies.
Thank you!!!
Hi,
I'm a little late here but I wanted to help support you as well.
Jennifer
"Oh, that you would bless me indeed, and enlarge my territory, that Your hand would be with me, and that You would keep me from evi
HI Lily! Have you been diagnosed with tachycardia? If so, have you been prescribed any meds? I was diagnosed with tachycardia when I was 24 years old. I have been taking 80 mg of Inderal ever since. Yes, it can be pretty scary sometimes especially if you suffer from anxiety or panic disorders ( which I was just diagnosed with). Have you spoken to your primary care physcian about your suspicions? Taking Inderal has helped it alot over the years but I still sometimes experience episodes where my heart feels like its going to jump right out of my chest and do the kiever on the floor. Ive come to learn that deep breathing and calming thoughts will sometimes help it go away and return to normal. I would speak to your doctor if you havent already ...... and try the deep breathing stuff......hope I could help!
Angel
Hi Angel-
I haven't been diagnosed with anything. I'm a student, so I don't really have a PCP. I used 'tachycardia' in the generic sense, simply referring to rapid heartbeat as opposed to a standalone diagnosis.
This only started a few weeks ago, and I've been away from school and therefore unable to access health services. I go back tomorrow night, though, and will be trying to see someone after my return.
Amy