Jane.....UGH......Did I mention......UGH
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| Fri, 01-27-2006 - 5:33pm |
First let me start with the new dr. He was nice, Dh & I didn't like him as much as the first dr but he is going to petition the ins. co for the pychiatric testing set up for next week. He is more than willing to pass it on to my other dr if things do not click with him. Overall he was a nice guy so that went well. Now on to the chaos of the day!
I am so MAD!!!!!!!!! Jane was so horrible with me. She was totally fine until I told her that not only was I seeking a second opinion about the BP dx but that I'd stopped taking my lithium.
She claims that she'd downgraded my dx to BP2 which she never informed me of but then goes on to say that I need to accept that I have a "serious chronic mental illness." She also pulled the "i know more about meds" card than you do which annoyed me. It is true, she is "supposed" to be the expert but nothing like making me feel stupid. She claims that buspar will do nothing for me. She is stuck on the fact that lithium is the drug for me even though it's never controlled my anxiety. She went on to further say that she has a "hard time" giving me xanax if I refuse to take the lithium. I tried to tell her that I'm more than open to trying a med that is more for anxiety that is not xanax but she didn't want to hear it. She was totally stuck on the lithium (period). She now wants me back on the lithium and when I see her next time, If I go, She will add risperdol to my meds to help with the anxiety. She is so stuck on the numbers in my blood level and not what I feel. Also, Dh brought up a very good point, If she were the know it all why didn't she do the psychiatric testing!?!? Part of my point to her is that I hate taking so many meds and I hate that I am stuck to them like glue, they run my life. Lithium 12hrs apart, No exceptions otherwise it makes me sick and without the right food it will make me sick. Being sick from lithium is no joke if you've never experienced it. Well, just the thought of lithium makes me sick. I do not think I'm going back to her. I'm going to see the first dr on Tuesday, I will report to him what happened and ask him for a referal to a psychiatrist because Jane has me very upset. She basically called me a stupid junkie and said that if I weren't willing to play by her rules that it was better I find someone else. UGH!!!!!!!!!!
~Danielle

Jennifer
"Oh, that you would bless me indeed, and enlarge my territory, that Your hand would be with me, and that You would keep me from evi
Thanks Jennifer, I agree with you.
Until the psych. eval is done I do not think I'm going to go back on the lithium. If at that time it is seen that I need it then I'll go back on or try something else but until then I am going to enjoy a bit of freedom from it. To tell you the truth I feel more human off of it and in a good way. My head feels so much clearer and my memory is better too which I really like.
Amazing how someone's true colors will eventually come through all on their own. I think she was there when I needed her but now it's time to move on. I felt this impass coming on a while ago and it finally has come to a head and I think she knows it too.
Dh knew something was wrong when I came out of that office, I had smoke coming out of my ears. He didn't even try to talk with me for at least 15 minutes because he knew that I was that mad. She really pushed my buttons this time and not for the good.
Hugs & Positive Thoughts Always,
Thanks Jan.
I didn't even know it existed until not long ago and I didn't even think to wonder why Jane hadn't done it until now. There just isn't much to say in regards to Jane at this point. She has shown her true colors.
Hugs & Positive Thoughts Always,
She sounds like a freak :)
Sheri Ann
I am sorry people are so rude and insenitive, but it sounds like you are keeping things together alot better than I probly could, Hang in there and know you are in my thoughts and prays ok..If you need to chat let me know even if you want to vent I won't take offence I know you need some to yell at someone sometimes so you can yell at me..lol really at least you could get it off your chest and then later when you feel better I won't be mad,because I know in the long run you needed to vent.
Lynn
I did get my xanax by agreeing to go back on the lithium which at the time wasn't an empty promise but it is now after a lot of thought and discussion with dh.
She didn't care about my other mother passing. She expressed her sympathies but made me feel that I was using her death as an excuse and nothing more. EVIL WOMAN!!!!!!!!!!
You're right. This is a learning curve as there arem any in life. I am not worried. I'll wait until Tuesday to talk with dr #1, see what he says and recommends. I'm not opposed to meds but I do not want one's that I DO NOT need and I do not want to be on xanax full time. I know it works and works well but if there is an alternative I'd like to choose that door. Personally my all time dream would be to go back to NO pills but I suppose at this poitn in the game it's not a realistic goal.
Hugs & Positive Thoughts Always,
Thank you Lynn.
Jane really had me angry this afternoon. To be honest instead of our planned shopping trip to the mall we went to lunch and I had a good stiff drink to shake it off. It helped and then venting to my other mother (step mother) really helped too. She has been very supportive in all of this and I trust her very much. Jane talked of team work but she is a dictator not a team player : (
Hugs & Positive Thoughts Always,