Bummed out
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| Tue, 03-07-2006 - 3:39am |
I was just off for a few days from work and have to go back today. Instead of getting ready I am sitting here because I truly do not want to go in to that place. I want to call in sick so bad. Plus I didn't get any good sleep. I tossed and turned and looked at the clock pretty much the whole night. I feel awful right now like things aren't right or that this is not really me. It still feels like I am dreaming sort of.
I know that I am not crazy and that I need to stop procrastinating and go to the doctor but I just feel trapped inside my emotions. Also I am kind of scared to go to the doctor to be truthful and I don't know why. Maybe I think that they will think I am crazy or maybe I am just scared to get better. All I know is that I don't want to feel this way any longer.
Thanks for listening.

Hello mrmet.
You're not going crazy.
Sheri Ann
LOL I am pretty sure that I am not your brother....or am I ;)
Actually right now I am feeling pretty good other than the fact that I am tired and really bored. My kids are watching toons and my wife isn't feeling good so she is laying down and resting.
I have been to the doctor for this, about 4 or 5 years ago though. I actually went through the employee assistance program that my employer provides. I recieved 4-6 visits with a psychologist (chiastrist) for free and it really made me feel better because it assured me that I wasn't going crazy. I also had gotten a prescription to Paxil which seemed to work real good for me. In fact, my PCP offered me up some Paxil when I explained to him what I was going through. Now I have a new PCP that I have not ever seen. Plus I go through days like today. Early in the morning I tell myself that I am going to make an appt. with the doctor today. Then I feel better later on when I get home from work and think that I am cured even though I know better.
I really don't know what my hesitation is to just go see the doctor. Maybe it is part shame or embarassment. I really wish I knew. I do know that like your brother, my wife doesn't understand what I go through. And I know that it bothers here that I have these issues.
I know that the only way to get better is to take matters into my own hand and simply pick up the phone.
Thanks for your support.
Thanks for your reply. I didn't make the appointment today as things were just non-stop from the moment I got home until about 6. Kids doctors appointments and stuff. Yes, I did go to work today and it was hell as usual. It is hard to go the whole 8 hours most of the times.
I am going to try and make the appointment tomorrow if I don't talk myself out of it. I don't know why I am so hesitant to just do it. I will let you know when it is for.
Again thanks to you and everyone else who honestly have amde a big difference for me.
:)
You ARE NOT ALONE in this.
I have had anxiety for a yr and this past weekend I came down with double ear infections and strep throat. Well that threw me into a major panic, that and my son is also having surgery tomorrow.
PLEASE know that we are here for you. Post as much as you need. We are all here for each other and all love each other. I venture to say that we have the best, most loving and kind board on IV.
Hugs,