Why don't I want to see my friend?
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| Fri, 04-07-2006 - 1:03pm |
I hate it when my depression and anxiety makes me not want to be around people. I have a hard enough time being around people as it is. Earlier in the week, my best friend asked if she could come over this weekend and I didn't answer right away because I really wasn't up to it. I moved into my new place at the end of February, and she wants to see it. Now I love her to death, but sometimes it can be exhausting for me to be around her because she's very inquisitive and I like my privacy. I know she will want to go over every inch of the apartment looking around. Seriously. I've mentioned what a nice tub I have, so I would not be surprised if she wants to pull back the shower curtain to see it. And all the questions. I was freaking out to begin with because my place has very limited storage and until I can buy some shelving and stuff, I still have boxes sitting around because I've run out of places to put things. I didn't want to have anyone over until it looks better. But then yesterday she was having a really bad day at work and sounded really down and she wanted us to go out Saturday. I said yes, but now of course that means she's coming over and I'm going to have to go on a marathon cleaning/straightening rampage to get my place ready. I'm the kind of person who wants everything to look perfect for company. All last night I thought about canceling, but I don't want to hurt her feelings. So I guess I'll just have to suck it up.
I know it's not normal, this intense need I have for privacy and to be alone. I just don't know how to deal with it. If I try to be around people (aside from being at work where I have to be with people, that is), then I get antsy.
Laura


(((Laura))) This is just my take on the subject. I am a very private person, too. But, I like to see my friends. If I'm anxious about them coming over, I tell them in advance(call it a little white lie or stretching the truth) that my time is limited because my parents or someone else is coming @ such & such a time. Then, I can comfortably get through the visit. If things are going great & I feel that I can take on a longer visit, I will say, *oh, did I tell you, the plumber can't make it until next week?* LOL
As for the house & having it in perfect order, forget it. I love to read those cleaning shortcuts in women's magazines & there's alot of good content right here on iVillage. I love Flybabies. I keep the house picked up by just walking through a room to answer the phone. I sort as I go. I clean a drawer or fold laundry while I'm talking. I have 2
make those excuses and little white lies
however I figure it this way GET IT OVER WITH!!
one less thing to worry about!!!
Your friend LIKES YOU not your things!
I know she is TYPE A but why worry yourself over that
it just doesn't matter--- or shouldn't-
Hope this helps a little and I am sure Jan's suggestions
will help you! Judy
Laura, how did it go with your friend??
Sheri Ann