I'm having a really bad night....

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-06-2003
I'm having a really bad night....
6
Mon, 05-01-2006 - 9:45pm

I haven't been here in a long time...things have been even busier than they were a few weeks ago, and I've been scrambling to keep up.

I was doing really great for a while, and then a week ago after another high-stress peak the attacks started coming again. I had had maybe two in the previous month, now I've had four in the past week. I've had a drawn out one since 6:00 tonight when I had some fluttering in my chest. Of course that got me obsessing about my heart, which was made worse by a couple twinges under my left breast when I took very deep breaths. Then of course I started taking my pulse while deep breathing...which only got me freaked out when my heart slowed down and I decided my pulse felt "squishy" in my neck.

I keep seesawing between almost fine and being hysterical. I started crying out of nowhere while washing my dinner dishes, and it's coming on again. My diet hasn't been very good, but I've been avoiding caffeine like the plague. I am so freaked out and frustrated right now. DH is in London, so I can't event talk to him because it is almost 3am over there and his cell phone doesn't work. Everyone else gets worried when this happens and I don't need more worrying....

10:30

This is really bad...I can't stop crying. Every time I get clamed down and think I can get on with my work, it starts agin. I keep having mild chest pains and I can't stop crying...really hard too. This hasn't happened before except when I was really sad or lonely. Maybe it's lonelinessl....I really wwant to tak to my husbands but I can't and there's nobody else who can calm me down wyen this happened. I emailed my therapist but it's late and I don't think she'll answer me tonight.....I really hate this and I don't know what to do to make it stop

If anyone is online, please let me know. I really need a chat.




Edited 5/1/2006 10:31 pm ET by lily_rose_fae
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-22-2003
Mon, 05-01-2006 - 10:49pm

I'll be right there :)


Hugs,


Sheri Ann

Image hosting by Photobucket

Sheri Ann

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-22-2003
Tue, 05-02-2006 - 9:16am

How are you doing this morning?

Sheri Ann

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-06-2003
Tue, 05-02-2006 - 10:11am

Thank you Sheriann-

I feel better today. Tired, but better. I decided to email my professors about what happened and so I'm not going to class today, just catching up on my work at home. My therapist will be calling in an hour or so and may have a last-minute spot for me this afternoon. DH says I'm scheduled for an MRI the day I get to Londond.

Thanks a lot for staying up to chat with me last night...it was a big help! Shortly after we signed off I went to bed and fell right asleep. Didn't get up until a half hour ago!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-22-2003
Tue, 05-02-2006 - 10:16am

Great!

Sheri Ann

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-11-2004
Tue, 05-02-2006 - 2:07pm
Sorry to hear that you've hit a rough patch, Amy. I am glad to see that you remembered us. Keep in touch & let us know how things go. Sending P&PT's your way. (((hugs))) jan




 

 


 



iVillage Member
Registered: 06-06-2003
Tue, 05-02-2006 - 11:46pm

Thanks, Jan...I'm better today, just tired and headachy. Hopefully another full night of sleep will help clear my head for the last push.

I'll be on more over the summer, I hope. It will be busy too, but I think a more sane kind of busy. This...I'm not really sure how to describe this. "Busy" doesn't seem adequate, but I don't know what other word to use....

Thanks for the support, as always.