Heather I wish I had the magic words to say to make things better for you. I do know that sometimes this disease trys to get the better of us. But as Jan told me when I first came here we have to take baby steps and to not question why we are this way but learn to accept it and work towards getting better. I know that isn't easy but take it one day at a time. And know you're in a caring community where we have all been there in our own way.
I feel so bad for you. I know you feel like a failure, but you couldn't be further from it. You are a wonderful mother to Tyler, and he is blessed to have you. Just think about how much you love him, and how much love you will have for your new little one.
It is ok if you don't feel connected right now. It might seem surreal to you. I suffered terribly with both my pregnancies with depression and anxiety. I thought I could never love my child. I thought I didn't want it, and now I have two. When I was pregnant with my second child, I felt horribly guilty that my first son would feel left out, and that I couldn't love anyone as much as him. It actually took me a long time to bond with my second, even once he was born. Now I have two beautiful boys who both, in their own ways, make my world complete. If I never had my second boy, then I would never have been able to give my eldest son the amazing gift of a brother. A sibling that he can grow old with, long after I am gone. It is a blessing to have a sibling, and you are doing Tyler a huge favor by giving him a brother.
Best of luck to you, and know you are not alone. I had very simular feelings, and I even went as far as taking lexapro while I was pregnant. I was so anxious, and I could not stand myself. After the first 15 weeks or so, everything evened itself out, and I was able to come to terms with my new life as a mom of two.
Heather I wish I had the magic words to say to make things better for you. I do know that sometimes this disease trys to get the better of us. But as Jan told me when I first came here we have to take baby steps and to not question why we are this way but learn to accept it and work towards getting better. I know that isn't easy but take it one day at a time. And know you're in a caring community where we have all been there in our own way.
Keitha
Heather, have you considered trying to love this baby?
Sheri Ann
Hi there,
I feel so bad for you. I know you feel like a failure, but you couldn't be further from it. You are a wonderful mother to Tyler, and he is blessed to have you. Just think about how much you love him, and how much love you will have for your new little one.
It is ok if you don't feel connected right now. It might seem surreal to you. I suffered terribly with both my pregnancies with depression and anxiety. I thought I could never love my child. I thought I didn't want it, and now I have two. When I was pregnant with my second child, I felt horribly guilty that my first son would feel left out, and that I couldn't love anyone as much as him. It actually took me a long time to bond with my second, even once he was born. Now I have two beautiful boys who both, in their own ways, make my world complete. If I never had my second boy, then I would never have been able to give my eldest son the amazing gift of a brother. A sibling that he can grow old with, long after I am gone. It is a blessing to have a sibling, and you are doing Tyler a huge favor by giving him a brother.
Best of luck to you, and know you are not alone. I had very simular feelings, and I even went as far as taking lexapro while I was pregnant. I was so anxious, and I could not stand myself. After the first 15 weeks or so, everything evened itself out, and I was able to come to terms with my new life as a mom of two.
You will be amazing.
Best wishes to you. Jolie