new to the boards...anxiety about my kid

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-28-2006
new to the boards...anxiety about my kid
2
Wed, 06-28-2006 - 10:17pm
Hi,
This is my first time on ANY boards...
I'm 26 and am married with 2 kids....3yrs and 5yrs. I've been dealing with anxiety since I was a child, but mainly for the past 6 years. I had a miscarrige before the birth of my oldest, which triggered panic attacks. The REAL reason for ALL of my anxiety is because my brother and my dad died by the time I turned 9 years old. I used to take Paxil ( for 5 years) and recently got off it and am doing relatively well except for an obsession with death ( as my doc. says). My children and I were involved in a car accident last September, nothing major, totalled my car, but we only had bruises, but ever since then, my fear of them dying is becoming increasing. I have catastophic thoughts about them at night when I go to sleep. These are not thoughts of me hurting them, but another car crash, someone breaking into the house at night, end of the world stuff, ect. Yes, I know, I have major post-tramatic stress. My obsessive thoughts are of how to protect them. Tomorrow morning, we are driving to Michigan ( 8 hours). Of course, this is scaring me. I haven't had a full blown panic attack for years, until today, as I was driving home from work. I actually started to cry....in traffic!! Thank god for sunglasses. It actually made me feel a lot better and I got through it. But now, after putting the kids to bed, I feel nervous again. My main anxiety comes during the stress of the day, which is why it's happening now, before my vacation...ironic, huh? I know that I'm not 'crazy' and that noone that has these issues are, but it's hard to remember that, when I FEEL so 'crazy' and when I verbalize these feelings, it's sounds even worse. My doctor said today that she is amazed at how normal and matter a fact I talk about all my childhood tradgedies and how 'well adjusted' I am....well...it's cause I've had LOTS of counseling thru the years!!! But I still feel 'crazy' on the inside. My question is: will I ever NOT be overwhelmingly obsessed about my kids safety? How can I stop the thoughts at night? Thanks for anyone who reads this, I feel better typing this all out.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-22-2003
Wed, 06-28-2006 - 11:21pm

Hi & welcome :)

Sheri Ann

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-11-2004
Thu, 06-29-2006 - 7:03pm

Hi, Bee! Nice to have you here. You are NOT alone. I used to have the intrusive/obssessive thoughts about my children's safety. It seems to run in spells. More than likely, the car accident triggered your current spell. I can assure you that it will pass. But, never soon enough for those of us with anxiety.


Please check out our *coping tips & tricks* folder below. With belly breathing & learning to meditate, I have a better handle on my thoughts. I use these techniques @ night to get to sleep. I also use imagery & have my alarm clock set to ocean sounds that run for an hour until I drift off. Have you tried any relaxation CD's? They might help you drift off, too. When the negative thinking pops into your head, bombard it with positive thoughts. Write out a list & keep it handy to read when you need too.


Please don't be a stranger. We care & want you to feel better. Drop into chat if you can. Post anytime. Good luck & GBU! (((hugs))) jan