icky feelings
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icky feelings
| Wed, 07-12-2006 - 10:33am |
does anyone else experience this? I have feelings of "unreality" where nothing quite feels solid or real.. and then, when looking at people i KNOW AND LOVE... all of a sudden.. its like im looking at a familiar stranger, but i know them! its scaring me. its been happening with my boyfriend, and im trying to tell myself.. this is the man you love. we have been together for two years. you KNOW him . quit being scared. yesterday, the same thing happened with my MOM.. I know who they are, I know who i am, but it feels very insecure. the same thing happened on july 4th with my brother as well. i really was looking at him and was thinking to myself.. man, hes gotten older! he has gray hair! and then that feeling hit me.. am i just losing it? it makes me panic.. feeling like i need to hide away because no one feels close right now.

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I've had this happen many times.
Sheri Ann
Thanks so much for writing. Yes, that feeling like you are not really you and you are not really here is very scary. For me, I have had passing thoughts before where I'd like look at my husband or dog or something and think are they really real? Or like are we all really here and are we for real and is this what life is all about? And back when that first happened it was weird, but I did not totally freak. I got bothered by it and talked to someone and they thought it was actually interesting and said they had thought that way before and felt it was just me being inquisitive and thinking too much.
Then I started doing it again last week a little more obsessively. Like I would not leave it alone. I kept analyzing it. I should have known that would have led to more problems (knowing would not have stopped it of course though). Then I turned it inward and started thinking that the feelings of thinking others were not real was no biggie but then maybe I was not really me and that really set me off big time. I ended up overthinking it to death yesterday and really paid the price. I felt so messed up. I was thinking I was certainly developing some terrible brain disorder and that I was doomed. I was jealous of everyone around me that could carry on and act normal and deal with normal life. And here I was feeling totally removed and like paralyzed mentally.
Kml,
i have bad anxiety as well and when i read your post, i realized im not the only one feeling this!...it was a big releif. i totally know what your talking about..i was out to dinner w/my family and felt the same feelings...like it wassnt real or like i was going crazy or something...does that sound familiar?...its scary, isnt it?
i dont really talk about my feelings w/my boyfriend because i dont think i could even describe what i feel???
(((Spingirl))) I know these thoughts are very real to us. But, you will NOT go crazy. I had my first PA when I was 17 & now I am 54. This feeling has been the hardest to cope with & it IS so difficult to explain. You will NOT be harmed by it. It takes 11 positive thoughts to overcome one negative thought. Try to focus on positives. Write a list & read it. Read Bible passages if you find some peaceful ones that help you. Listen to relaxation tapes/CD's. Learn to meditate or belly breathe. You CAN get through this.
We care & are so glad you posted. Drop into chats if you can. I'll post tomorrow evenings chat after midnight. Good luck & GBU! You are very welcome here. jan
I totally know how that feels and it's really scary. It questions everything you know and trust about EVERYTHING. Anything is scary when it doesn't feel normal, or what you're used to. I don't have it much anymore, but I'm on medication. Alot of good advice I've gotten from this board is to make sure that you are eating, drinking and getting enough rest and exercise. That helps me in ALL my anxiety and stress. '
HTH!
YES! Very scary. Especially when it is about yourself or people you are close to. That makes you feel like you are really losing it for sure. It is very disabling mentally. So scary...At least we can take comfort in knowing we are not alone.
Kim
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