bad news causing anxiety

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
bad news causing anxiety
7
Sun, 07-16-2006 - 12:55pm

Haven't been here for awhile but really need to talk to people who understand. My son, my ONLY son,( I have 4 dd's) has cronic lymphatic lukemia. He went through several weeks of chemo last summer and into the Fall. Prior to that he had been in remission for 4 yrs. At his last check up they found his white count was once again elevated, an indication the cancer is back. He can't have anymore treatment until it has been a full year. He will have to ride it out for a few months. I saw the fear on his face when he was telling me. This of course has thrown me into anxiety. In just a little over a year I have lost 7 close friends and relatives. One of them being my mom to cancer the end of Jan. Two of them were my best friends, women my age. One to cancer, one had an anurysm. These are the people I talked to about my anxiety! I am so glad for this board as I feel I have no one now.My dh absolutely refuses to acknowledge or deal with my anxiety/ panic problems so there is no help there. I know I just have to get through it and I know I will but I really needed to talk to someone.

I have been having stomach problems for a couple of weeks now. I know its stress related as I've had all kinds of tests. I keep worrying that I have stomach cancer though. Two days in a row I've had those painless occural migraines which always throw me into a tizzy! I hate spending 20 - 30 min. not being able to see clearly! With all the deaths in the past year,dealing with my mom's estate and now my son coming out of remission I am stressed beyond belief. That causes physical symptoms, then I worry about them! Its a vicious circle!!

For years I have had a dream that something, (I can't identify it), is after me. I wake up in a panic!! I had it last night and woke up with my chest hurting, sweating and panic just rolling through me. I got up and calmed myself down then I layed there trying to figure out what was after me. After all these years I think I've figured it out! Its panic!! Do you think I could be right? The dreams are always different but something I can't see or identify is after me.

Thanks fo listening to me. Sharon

GRACIE

Betty Boop Protected by Angels Sign

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-27-2003
Sun, 07-16-2006 - 3:51pm

hi sharon and welcome to the board.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-11-2004
Sun, 07-16-2006 - 4:48pm

WB, Sharon. I wish it was under better circumstances. That must be really tough for any mother to see her son's cancer return. What sort of alternative treatments can he have until the year passes? I have seen ads on tv for centers that provide a holistic approach. They promote dietary changes, as well as lifestyle. Would your son consider this? Does his dr. feel that might be an option?


You need to take some time for yourself & de-stress. Hobbies, interests, exercise, yoga, etc. are things that work. With all that you've been through & the uncertain future, new ways to cope are essential. I don't know much about dreams, other than research indicates we work through our daily stress through our dreams. I have had dreams of being chased, but I saw what was chasing me. These dreams usually appeared when I was troubled & had experienced extreme changes or losses in my life. Please keep in touch, Sharon. We care & want to be here for you. Good luck & GBU! (((hugs))) jan




 

 


 



iVillage Member
Registered: 03-22-2003
Sun, 07-16-2006 - 7:08pm

(((Sharon))) I'm sorry to hear you are facing someting else.

Sheri Ann

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-25-2005
Sun, 07-16-2006 - 7:19pm
HUGS AND HUGS SHARON!!!
I am so sorry for all you have been through!! Losing your
good friends is awful! I am glad you feel that you can talk here!!
I get the occular migraines also--- do you take any medications
for anxiety or stress?? I have a doc who does hypnosis with me
and I listen to a tape he made each day which helps me totally relax for
20 minutes it does help me.
The only thing that helps me with the occular migraine is to
take a xanax and go to sleep!! Sometimes I do get a migraine headache also.
YOU and your husband need each other now I feel so bad that
he will not listen to you!! Does he keep it all to himself?
If you go to a therapist would he be willing to go also??
What you are going through is tragic and you need someone nearby
to help you. I hope that your daughters understand???
I will be praying for you and your family and son!!! Judy
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
Mon, 07-17-2006 - 11:31am
I wanted to thank everyone who replied to my post. Its nice to feel like someone cares. In answer to some of your questions, I don't know if my son would try the Holistic appraoch or not.Thats a good suggestion and I will mention it to him. I do know he'll push for whatever they're willing to try. He has two little girls and wants to watch them grow up. As far as my dh, he just doesn't believe that there is such a thing as anxiety/panic. He doesn't have it therefore it doesn't exist. He doesn't want to be bothered with it at all. He gets very angry at me for not being able to do some things he wants to do. He sees it as me just not wanting to. But you all know how bad we would love to be able to do what some people take for granted!! He absolutely can not understand my inability to handle the stress I've been under. He has said "it hasn't been that bad". It hasn't been for him, I lost my friends, my son in law and my Mom. I don't want to complain about him, he just isn't understanding which makes me thankful for you guys. All of my DD's are very understanding about my anxiety. My oldest dd has anxiety/panic problems herself. There is nothing I can do for my son except, pray and be there. I have decided to get up at 5:30 am each morning and walk for 30 -45 min. I have some inspirational tapes to listen to while I walk and it will be a good oppurtunity to pray. I always feel better when I'm on a walking regimen. Hopefully this will help with some of the stress. Thanks again to all who answered my post. Sharon

GRACIE

Betty Boop Protected by Angels Sign

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-22-2003
Mon, 07-17-2006 - 6:50pm

Sharon, I LOVE the walking idea!!

Sheri Ann

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-16-2006
Mon, 07-17-2006 - 9:36pm
My heart goes out to you and your family.. I never want totake for granted the fact that my family is healthy. I cannot fathom the idea of what you are going through and have been through. Are you seeing a therapist for this? I think you should and maybe your family too. It is so much to handle on your own.