What would you do in this situation?
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| Tue, 08-22-2006 - 12:58pm |
I'm looking for opinions here. Obviously, I am in this situation right now. Here it is:
--There is a relative you don't like who will be having an out-of-state wedding and you are invited.
--While your travel/hotel expenses will be paid for, you will need to buy a formal dress, shoes, accessories, etc.
--You won't know anyone there except your parents, the bride, the bride's sister, and the bride's parents.
--Not going would make all of the above relatives mad at you and would incite massive guilt trips from your parents.
--Going to this wedding would make you extrememly edgy, depressed, and feeling inadequate as in: "You're still single? Don't worry--you'll find *someone*!"
--However, if you go, you have your bottle of Klonopin and/or the open bar at the reception to help you through.
Knowing all of the above facts, would you:
a) go to the wedding and make the best of it
b) not go to the wedding but send a very nice gift instead
c) other
~ Laura ~


Laura, I would not go.
Sheri Ann
Jennifer
"Oh, that you would bless me indeed, and enlarge my territory, that Your hand would be with me, and that You would keep me from evi
You know what is interesting to me is that I posed this question an another board I'm on, and most of the people there also said I shouldn't go. I don't know why I'm obsessed with it now anyway; the wedding isn't for a long time. But I also know how my family operates, and I have to admit that I'm scared to refuse to go. My parents will rake me over the coals for this (it's my dad's side of the family). My parents were visiting these relatives last weekend (my mom hates them, but she went out of support for my dad), and she and I talked on the phone and the subject of the wedding came up and to test the waters I made a joke about not going, and she said "You ARE going" in a very flat voice.
I am 27 years old, for crying out loud! I'll be 28 by the time the wedding rolls around. I really, really, really do not want to go to this, but I can see the handwriting on the wall. I will be branded a villain by the entire family. I have pretty much done everything my parents have asked me all of my life and never defied them. And they know that. They are very controlling (I'm an only child, so that doesn't help matters either). I get that this isn't some distant relative or anything, but come on. I am an adult and should be capable of making my own choices. Is it really so unforgiveable to skip an out-of-town wedding where I won't feel welcome?
You ARE right; you are an adult capable of making your own decisions.
Jennifer
"Oh, that you would bless me indeed, and enlarge my territory, that Your hand would be with me, and that You would keep me from evi
Thanks, Jennifer. I've been seeing a therapist for awhile now, and--shocker!--one of the things we talk a lot about is my dealings with my parents and how controlling my mom is. I am better than I used to be, but I still have a long ways to go when it comes to them. Before, it probably would not have even occurred to me that I could skip the wedding. I'm sure I'll end up talking to my therapist about this. It probably would be a good idea to bring it up in advance of when I'll have to RSVP so that I can prepare myself for the coal raking I'll get.
Laura
Laura, I think you know what the *right* answer is.
Sheri Ann
Its an open bar... any problems that do arise, can easily be taken care of!! LOL Just kidding. I have been in this situation twice. Once I went, it sucked, but I got over it. 2nd time I didnt go, and I still have relatives mad at me to this day about it. Its definetly not worth it to not go!!
Kindra