Is this normal or am I a freak-LONG

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-16-2006
Is this normal or am I a freak-LONG
10
Thu, 09-07-2006 - 12:05pm
I have been on this board for the past month or so and it has helped a lot! I have lots of anxiety which in turn makes for depression. For example Today I have my house cleaners coming and I am spending like 5 hrs cleaning up for them-have two kids and a husband who works from home so it is a daily mess. The cleaners do all the deep cleaning that I never find time to do anymore. Lots of guilt over hiring them cause I am a SHM but do work pt at night from home and one day in the office and drive older kid to school and back and all activities everyday and little one to prek 3days. Kinda busy! Anyways, I am in a tizzy and shaking cause I am cleaning up all over the house from room to room and doing laundry and etc. Any mom knows the story. Why am I shaking and so stressed? I feel like I cannot handle anything. I am getting it all done but then worrying about leaving at 2 to get my daughter who gets out at 3pm and worrying about making it to her school open house at 5:30 and worrying will I get this all cleaned up so the cleaning girls can walk in and do their job? Maybe it was the strong coffee? I feel like I am not normal for stressing out over dumb stuff. I am trying not to take a 1/2 xanax cause I have tried to stop them a few days ago but i am so shaky. I have had high bp readings every time I go to the DR. even on xanax and they seem not to think it is a problem and that it is just I am anxious. MY big fear is the reverse that I have high BP and it is causing me to shake and feel so bad and have palpitations and feel a little dizzy at times. Could this be true or is it symptomless? Can it just be anxiety. I am on effexor xr only 37.5 mg low dose-trying to wean off slowly so I cn get on something more mils. I sweat all night while I sleep and wake up with creases all over my body and then I think that I am retaining water-which is another sign of high BP i think? I feel like a hypochondriac! I am a mess. Not all days are this bad. I feel like a whiner typing this since there are people who have real problems to worry about and I am just creating mine! I started getting this anxiety only 5 months ago and it seems like I am dwelling on it and using it as an excuse to be lazy an let things go and relax. I need to forgive myself more and not live up to my high expectations that everything needs to be so perfect. I fell like a failure if I let things go.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-11-2004
Thu, 09-07-2006 - 12:44pm

Sending big hugs to you! I think you need them today. We all have a perfection streak & it seems your's is focused on your life & house. Noone can be perfect. It took me along time, but I learned to relax & NOT try to do it all. It's exhausting to even try. Can you focus on what you want out of life? Maybe change your priorities. Life is pretty short. Noone will remember you for a disorganized life or a

 

 


 



iVillage Member
Registered: 07-16-2006
Thu, 09-07-2006 - 1:43pm
Gosh -you are so nice and told me exactly what I need to hear. You are right about everything you said and I am going to do what you say! Now if you could just come live with me for a few months :> I wish I could afford a therapist. Any books that you recommend or any calming tips?
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-11-2004
Thu, 09-07-2006 - 6:01pm

Thx;) You can always check out the self help book list in our *coping tips & tricks* folder below.


I wish I could come & stay with you. I mean that in all honesty. Having panic disorder for 36 years, I have seen my share of lows & know that I would have done so much better if I'd only known that others felt just like me. Since I can't be there, lean on our community for support. It has kept so many of us going. Good luck! (((hugs))) jan





 

 


 



iVillage Member
Registered: 07-08-2005
Fri, 09-08-2006 - 4:17am

Well shoot, jan beat me! thats ok though, she's good at telling us what we need to hear! :)
But, I just wanted to tell you that I feel exactly the same as you. Being a mommy is stressful, but remember our reward for all our hard work in the end: well raised, beautiful children. I can understand about all the "i feel like a hypochondriac" feelings. I'm constantly worried as well about what my symptoms could be. I'm now trying to teach myself to calm down and not look so seriously and catastrophically at them. If my doctor says I'm fine, then I'm going to have to learn to trust his expertise. You really are not making up anything. Thats the thing with Anxiety and Panic, your mind truly believes something is wrong. And if your brain senses something is wrong, then its doing its job and telling you to pay attention to that symptom. There is no quick cure for anxiety. It just takes cooperation with you and your therapist or doctor. I have heard about various side effects from medications that do include night sweats. And I agree with Jan in saying that you should really talk with your doctor about weaning you off your meds, cutting cold turkey isn't a fun ride. Just remember, you are in no way a failure. I HTH! (((HUGS)))

Ashley

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-19-2006
Fri, 09-08-2006 - 10:00am
You sound like me before I started taking Lexapro. I was so shakey and in a panic zone all day. The anxiety never stopped. I also take .25 mg of xanax. It's not much but it takes the edge off. Why are you trying to wean off effexor?
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-22-2003
Fri, 09-08-2006 - 12:56pm

Jan already said everything that comes to mind, except the coffee- yes, the strong coffee could be triggering your anxiety!


Sheri Ann

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Sheri Ann

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-15-1998
Fri, 09-08-2006 - 1:11pm

Jan definitely said everything! But one thing to add to this-- I see a therapist once a month (started at once a week) and it is covered by my insurance. I pay a "specialist" co-pay on each visit, and I was approved by insurance for something like 50 visits a year.
Check with your insurance, maybe you can afford it! Our money is really tight, I could never afford someone to clean my house (though I could desperately use it! LOL) but my dh and talked about how much the therapist is necessary and helpful for me, so we agreed it was worth the $35 co pay.

Just MHO-- if that helps at all.
Karen

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-16-2006
Sat, 09-09-2006 - 10:12pm
Thanks, I am trying to get off Effexor because I have been reading the horror stories about how hard it is to get off. I took 37.5 mg for one week and then 75mg for two weeks and then I started reading how it was a nighmare and people go to the ER trying to get off of it, so I reduced back down to 37.5 mg and it was 3 1/2 weeks of nausea and dizziness and a dull migraine and blurred vision. All of this makes you freak out and have even more anxiety of course. So now I am taking out 10 pellets from the 37.5 mg capsule and then in a few days it will be about 15 pellets for a few days and so on until it is almost out of my system then I am going to start Lexapro which is so much easier to go off of when I need to. I just don't want to take the Efexor for so long even though it works ok because the longer you are on it the harder to get off. My father, a DR. even told me his own patients stories of being trapped on it and so on.. Scares me!
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-16-2006
Sat, 09-09-2006 - 10:25pm
I reallt wish I could get a therapist but medication will have to do for now.I have a husband who is self employed so we actually pay $600 a month for insurance that only covers the basics. I work pt and have no benefits. I would have to pay 100% out of pocket for a therapist and the ones I have been refered to are about 250-300 for the first visit and then about 180-200 after. That is so much for me to afford right now. Preschool has taken my last dime! My cleaning ladies are really really cheap and if I had to get rid of them I'd regret it later cause you can't find them this cheap anywhere! It is a nice luxury and I'd rather cut my own hair than give them up:)I guess this board helps a lot and I have been reading a good book called Panic to Power that is very calming. Oh well
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-11-2004
Sun, 09-10-2006 - 8:52pm
Some ideas on low cost therapy. HTH