What brought you to your Anxiety?
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What brought you to your Anxiety?
| Sat, 09-09-2006 - 2:02pm |
I thought I'd just ask. When my psychologist diagnosed me with Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD), he told me that he thought I'd had it all along, but for some reason, was able to suppress it during the school years. I read that this was brought on by stressful events in one's life. In my case, it was being in the Navy, transferring back from overseas, getting married, and now having a baby, and now making another career change.
Just started my first Pre-Nursing class for the 2nd Bacclaureate Nsg program..Pathophysiology. Hope everyone is doing great!
Yaddiya

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Hi there - Mine would be a mixture between the anxiety and the depression .. I've had so many "diagnosis" from different therapists and dr.s from OCPD (obsessive compulsive personality disorder), ACA (adult child of an alcoholic), GAD, and mild to severe depression. Although there was only one time where I was severely depressed to where I wouldn't leave the house often and that was about 4 or so years ago. It seems this most recent doc, the one who diagnosed me as having GAD made me think the depression was brought on by the anxiety, but I don't know if I agree with that.
I've had both for as long as I can remember, the most recent memories of actually being depressed in my teens, and my first full blown anxiety/panic attack about 4 years ago when I was severely depressed. So who knows, if one goes hand in hand with the other *shrug* ... I've just recently started medication about a week ago so we'll see how that goes!
Nice to "meet" you! :)
Good for you that you can talk yourself down from your panic attacks. I'm trying to talk myself out of the GAD feeling that I've been having!
I'm sorry what you're going through with your dh. I was in the military, and I know about those sudden deployments, etc. I haven't really ever been suddenly deployed, but I know a few friends who were. Believe me, it wasn't fun!
Wishing you the best, and my thoughts and prayers are with you/your family!
Yaddiya
Wow...this is a really good question. I have always been rather high strung. My dad's nickname for me was "shaky' cause i could never hold my hand steady and even when i sat my fingers or foot always had to be moving. This started when i was about 6. He had my IQ tested when i was in the 6th grade and it was 140 then. I think i pretty much kept the anxiety under control with the help of my dad who was bi polar and managed w/o medication quite well.
When i was 14 he died 2 days after my favorite uncle, we moved in the dead of night i was taken from my friends and my half brothers and sister. I was forbidden from seeing my fathers side of the family along with 9 of my half brothers and sister whom i had been with my entire life, living in a stressful 1 parent household with a mother i had just met all in the course of 6 months played a part as well. I was angry and defensive and anti social. That i believe was the beginning of the supression of my emotions which led me to this point. GAD and Bipolar II. My doctor says and i believe that i have lived in a crisis mode since that point, supressing my emotions to cope with my life. Finally the age of 26 i began to crack, just hairline at first then deeper and deeper. I was almost fired and went to a doctor. That was 3 1/2 years ago. only recently have i accepted this is part of my life and dealt with it. It will always be with me and i must constantly check my behaviour but i nolonger hide from myself. its still a bit foggy but i see the outline of what will be a beautiful day.
My panic attacks were horrible when my dh deployed.
Sheri Ann
Wow... what brought on the anxiety... bare with me - it's a little long with alot of info..
In highschool I was always care free and had a really great time.. I did what I wanted, when I wanted.. I was responsible with my actions, but so care free and "immune" to things like Anxiety.. my biggest worry was which club we'd go to first on saturday.. I graduated highschool and started college.. about a year into school - my best friend in the entire world was killed in a car wreck.. she had a baby girl that was 7 months old at the time.. (june 97) and my whole world just came crashing down. I had known people that died before, but it was never as gut wrenching as loosing Michele. When she died, I tried everything I could to be strong for her family and for other friends.. and little did I know I was doing more harm than good. I went into a major depression.. the first in my life really.. I found myself terrified to be away from the ones I love most in fear that I'd tell them good bye and get a call the next day to tell me they were gone.. my poor mother couldn't leave town without having to call me a million times to let me know that she was ok - and I was a nervous wreck the entire time she was away.
I began to put details into the terrifying thoughts I would have of something happening to someone so close to me again.. my mom.. my dad.. and my friends.. So I decided to take a semester off of college to regroup and try and pull myself back together.. It was like I couldn't stop grieving long enough to start accepting and dealing with what had happened. I began to live life very carelessly and made some really bad decisions.. I had no desire really to keep going.. I was basically just existing with this terrible pain inside me from the loss. I always thought it was just depression.. it was much later that I'd learn it was the beginning of anxiety also. About 6 months after her death, one of those bad decisions led to finding out I was pregnant. Unwed, 19, and terrified.. I was never the one that anyone would have ever thought would have a baby out of wedlock and before I finished college.. I was always too responsible for that.
I went through a rough pregnancy and suffered some health problems and a little over a year after her death I gave birth to a beautiful little boy. I put everything I could into being a good mom to him - but I was scared all the time.. not just the normal put your hand on the childs back once at night to make s ure they were still breathing - but more like 10 times.... then he got RSV and pneumonia and one night actually stopped breathing.. had I not been laying there watching over him, the hospital says that he would have died. this only made the problem worse.. when he was a little over 1 I moved to another city for a decent job and then found myself in a relationship with a man that I thought hung the moon! 1 problem.. his wife.. not an active wife.. but a in the process of divorce wife.. it was up and down emotionally dealing with the BS that it involved but I very quickly found myself deeply in love with him. about a year into the relationship he came home one day and out of the blue told me that I needed to move out and that we needed to break up.... That was the night I had my first panic attack.. he rushed me to the ER thinking that I was dying. I had them every night after that for a long time.. even though we got back together 2 weeks later and stayed together another year or so... I suffered from panic attacks sometimes 2 and 3 times a day the whole time.. tried different medications and therapy.. nothing seemed to make it better..
finally after we broke up for good, the dr. put me on klonopin which killed the panic attacks for me almost immediately! and about 3 months later we weaned me from medication all together.. life began to get better , I got married to my now husband.. and got pregnant with our first child together.. I suffered some anxiety/panic during pregnancy but nothing out of the ordinary.
so I went over 2 years with out medication and without any major problems.. then last fall work started getting hectic and I got a new boss that I just really didn't mesh well with .. i noticed over the course of a few months that i just dreaded going to work because I had to be around her and she just made me angry.. I wasn't having panic attacks but the anxiety was quickly building.. I finally agreed with the dr. to try effexor once I got to the point that I was just all together irritable and was always angry.. at everyone.. my hubby, my kids... that wasn't acceptable to me.. so I've now been on effexor for about 9 months and it's working out really well for me.. and the xanax helps me when I need it.. I changed departments to get away from the boss about 6 weeks ago and it's even better.. i haven't had to take a xanax since moving to the new group.
I still get panicy when I can't find my mom.. or I know that she is traveling.. but for the most part i am able to deal with those feelings and move past them.
Told ya it would be long.. but there are several things that happened to get me to where I am now... :) good luck.. and thanks if you actually read all that.
Valerie
DS - Devin 8/18/98
DD - Abby 2/24/04
DH - Tripp 36 (Today is our 3 year anniversary).
I grew up with a depressed mother who attempted suicide, a father who drank way too much, and a verbally and physically abusive stepmother. I joined the Army right out of high school and I've always felt like a strong person. At the very end of my 4 years in the Army, I had a baby. The birth, the anemia, the pain meds, the new baby, the new marriage I guess were too much. It all began about 3 days after my son was born. By the way, I was with no family support. I have always wondered how much of it was chemically triggered. And back in January of this year I was put on progesterone for some female problems and when I stopped taking it, YIKES! No fun! Mood swings were awful! Well, after the baby is born, progesterone drops like crazy. Maybe a link? Who knows. I've had panic attacks and anxiety off and on (mostly on) ever since. Fourteen years now. I would have my son all over again though despite the anxiety and panic. Maybe it would have happened anyway. Who knows.
I've noticed that my brother and sister have the same anxiety issues and now my son does as well. My son and brother both handle it without meds. My sister does most of the time but sometimes needs the help of meds. I do most of the time. I did go a whole year without medication and I have no idea why that year was any different.
Laura
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