I feel so pathetic, embarrassed, scared

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-08-2005
I feel so pathetic, embarrassed, scared
9
Fri, 10-06-2006 - 8:50pm
I'm totally embarassed about what happened to me today at the grocery store. While we were walking through the store with my husband, mother and my oldest; my most feared feeling hit me. Out of nowhere; I wasn't even anxious. All of a sudden, I felt like my heart wasn't beating, then I felt like either there was a weight on my chest or I just couldn't breathe. I got down on my knees and stretched forward, then it felt like my heart was beating harder than normal, and fluttering. I felt like I was going to pass out, of course I was terrified. My husband told me to stand up and put my hands behind my head and take a deep breath. Of course within 30 seconds to a minute of this beginning, it stopped. Leaving me confused, shaky, and very anxious that I'm going to experience this again. I can't believe this happened again; its been over 6 months sinc I've had that feeling. I feel like I've let myself down. It just troubles me so much that this thing comes on suddenly, is gone just as fast as it came, and my heart goes right back to beating like nothing ever happened; while I'm left wondering what in the heck was that, am I going to die, and shaking so hard that I can't hold a can of soup...please tell me I'm not alone feeling this. I just feel so pathetic that this happened in front of my family. The only thing out of the ordinary that I can think of was that I haven't been sleeping too great, and I've had all that stress from this whole legal ordeal with our apartment complex. So I suppose, this has been a total come from behind attack..if it truly was an attack. I'm just flat out...TERRIFIED!


Edited 10/6/2006 9:08 pm ET by porcelianblondie
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-27-2003
Fri, 10-06-2006 - 9:15pm

hi there...


i know those horrible feelings all too well:(

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-08-2005
Fri, 10-06-2006 - 9:19pm
LOL, its ironic, here I've been talking to you heather about me doing pretty well...and now you're telling me it will be OK!! That thought made me smile :)
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-16-2006
Fri, 10-06-2006 - 9:45pm
Maybe you had low blood sugar? Sometimes if I feel weird for a second it panics me immediately and my heart races. Sometimes if I haven't eaten this happens. Don't worry about it, you are ok and nothing bad will happen to you if it does happen again. Sometime I just sit down and ride it out in stores and I am always ok and yes, it really does shake me up too!
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-08-2005
Sat, 10-07-2006 - 1:23am
..bump..
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-11-2004
Sat, 10-07-2006 - 9:23am

(((Ashley))) That's a shame that you feel as you do. You are chemically different than others. You have a flaw in your chemistry. NOT your character. If you had diabetes & then an insulin reaction, would you feel so badly? I'm guessing not. For whatever reason, *nerve* problems aren't as acceptable to us.


Thank goodness you were with family. Panicking when alone is even scarier for me. I am sorry if your family isn't understanding/supportive. They should be. If you haven't told them about your anxiety/panic, you should. When I finally came clean & told my friends/family, it was a relief. Now, we even joke about it sometimes. They don't treat me like an invalid or anything. But, they know my limitations & don't push me if I'm feeling anxious.


This was just a small setback. Keep it in perspective. It was a blip on the radar screen of life. You have many good days ahead. Many good years. Don't allow the fear to rule your life. Everyone who posts here is attempting to find their balance. It is possible. Good luck & GBU! jan


 

 


 



iVillage Member
Registered: 07-08-2005
Sat, 10-07-2006 - 9:58am
Thanks jan. I'm just so frustrated with myself. Today we're going to a military celebration and I've been excited about it all week; but now I'm just scared to go. And that feeling I got; I can't recall if I've ever experienced it before other than 2 other times alittle over 6 months ago. So, thats really whats got me up in a bunch...not to mention last night had some rather disturbing dreams on my part. I'm sure I'll be fine in a few days, its just the anxiety AFTER the attack that pisses me off sometimes.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-22-2003
Sat, 10-07-2006 - 9:11pm

Don't be embarassed or feel pathetic.

Sheri Ann

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-22-2003
Sat, 10-07-2006 - 9:13pm

LOL, it made me smile, too.

Sheri Ann

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-22-2003
Sat, 10-07-2006 - 9:15pm

Absolutely, that is such a good point.

Sheri Ann