Question

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-16-2005
Question
17
Sat, 10-07-2006 - 7:05pm

My partnrer use to be so good at accepting my illness and at least trying to keep my self esteem up there where I at least felt good about her and I. Lately things have changed and she's making me feel not so good about myself but I'm suppose to act as if everything is fine or she makes me feel even worse. Does anyone elses partners do this to them or I'm I starting to stand on thin Ice. Is this the beginning of the end or is she just tired of me being they way I am. It's not like I'm not trying to get better, but I could sure use her on my side instead of knocking down what little self esteem I have.

Keitha

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-11-2004
In reply to: kywomyn
Sat, 10-07-2006 - 7:30pm

(((Keitha))) This isn't a good place to be in

 

 


 



iVillage Member
Registered: 09-16-2005
In reply to: kywomyn
Sat, 10-07-2006 - 8:10pm

Jan Mel does have issues of her own. Everytime she comes home from Indiana she's like a differant person for usually weeks. Her Ex and her girlfriend spoil her and buy her all kinds of things, things I couldn't buy her in my wildest dreams. There's the land dispute.

And she's never had any children so the boys get on her nerves though on the whole they are good boys. I tried to talk her into moving our bedroom to the RV for the winter so we could have a place to be alone, but she refused. Now it seems as if she's mad at someone all the time and no matter who it is I end up being the one it's taken out on.

I love her I don't want to lose her I've tried to talk with her about it but all she does is yell and blame me. What's a girl to do.

Keitha

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-27-2003
In reply to: kywomyn
Sat, 10-07-2006 - 8:19pm

aw keitha, i can relate:( my dh goes throught bouts where he is not so supportive and can be downright mean...i think he gets frustrated w/me and my anxiety and sometimes he lets me know this.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-22-2003
In reply to: kywomyn
Sat, 10-07-2006 - 9:05pm

(((Keitha)))

Sheri Ann

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-22-2003
In reply to: kywomyn
Sat, 10-07-2006 - 9:07pm

Keitha, it really sounds like displaced anger.

Sheri Ann

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-22-2003
In reply to: kywomyn
Sat, 10-07-2006 - 9:08pm
Weren't we just talking about this in chat? ;)

Sheri Ann

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-16-2005
In reply to: kywomyn
Sun, 10-08-2006 - 11:56am

Thanks Heather I just needed to know I'm not alone in this part of my journey. My girl use to never be like this but since she's come back from Indiana things haven't been real good between her and I. Just ups my anxiety and makes me feel like I'm walking on eggs not sure what's going to set her off.

Keitha

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-16-2005
In reply to: kywomyn
Sun, 10-08-2006 - 12:12pm

Sheri thanks girl I just think maybe I'm getting worn down to the point I can't even think straight. I know she's under pressure also but I don't treat her badly like she's been doing to me. I've tried telling her how I feel but it doesn't seem to help a whole lot. Her idea of settling everything is to move us up north to caretake a farm for her ex and her girlfriend. I wouldn't be so against the idea but I hate the cold and we are talking cold weather. But I'll go with her not happily but I will go because I do love her. It'll probably be a year before the land is settled and she thinks taking me away from here will make it all better. I know it won't it'll make it worse cause I'll have her ex in my face. Not that she isn't a nice person but her and Mel are way to close to one another and eventually the jealousy will raise it's ugly head and things will become worse not better. I guess I'll just trust in the Lord and see where he leads me.

Keitha

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-11-2004
In reply to: kywomyn
Sun, 10-08-2006 - 5:02pm
There MUST be some alternatives here. Moving will just *move* your problems somewhere else. Hmm... I know you love Mel, but you shouldn't have to sacrifice your hopes & dreams just to be with her. I think some sort of compromise can be reached. Is there anyone who could talk with both of you, K? I'll be thinking of you & sending PT's your way. (((hugs))) jan


 

 


 



iVillage Member
Registered: 11-25-2005
In reply to: kywomyn
Sun, 10-08-2006 - 7:38pm
Keitha I am sorry about Mel. When things get a little rocky
here I just step back and stay out of the line of fire!!
Whatever is bothering her she is not sharing--- unfair it is!
Hubby broods like this is very quiet but yet gets nasty with
his comments.... then I lay low! Somehow it works out but it
makes me feel hurt, angry and very lonely!! Some people will not
share their troubles!! I hope that soon she is back to her
normal self---- Take care!! Judy

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